ANSWERS: 15
  • My parents divorced 19 years ago, when I was only 2. Growing up I never had much of a relationship with my father but as I got older I began to see him more than twice a year. Since I graduated high school, I would have to say that my mother (who's been remarried for 14 years almost) and my father are the best of friends and that I can talk to both of my parents about anything and everything now, they are my best friends. My father still tries to make up for all the lost time and it's funny but great that he cares so much.
  • Yes, I am. My parents divorced when I was two because my dad was an abusive loser. And it really affected my life because my mother was unable to cope with teh life she had made for herself and her children due to mental illness that went undiagnosed for years. We lived in poverty and were shipped from realative to relative for years till she kind of got it together. And then it was one sucky step father or boyfriend after the other till she married my dad when I was 12. It has greatly affected my realtionships as an adult because I never really saw a good man till I was much older. Add to that my dad was dead beat who could care less about me and you've got disater. I made some realy poor decision because I didn't know any better. I thought all realtionships had to turmultious at best to be real for along time. Now I've learned they were bad examples and try to take from better relationships I've seen like my great grand parents.
  • No I am not, but I do believe that things would have been alot better if I were. Too much bs going on between them and only reason they stayed together was for appearance :)
  • I am, and I was an adult when they divorced, too. I wish they had done it when I was young. My parents were married 20 yrs, which was 19 years too long for everyone involved.
  • Never affected me at all its the best thing she ever did.
  • My parents seperated when I was 20. I was going to college in Portland Oregon, My parents showed up one random day and wanted to take me out to lunch. I knew something was up and wasn't right so after lunch they took me out to the car and I climbed in the back seat and my Dad sat next to me. They told me that my mom was moving out and I got so mad inside, I just wanted to go back to the college, so they brought me back and I told my roommate. After they left I broke down and got distant from everyone. Seven years later I was at my Moms apartment I was sitting in her spare room talking to her and I looked over and saw divorce papers. They didn't have the nerve to tell us they let us find out on our own. My Dad would always say to me I wish your Mom would come back home, one day I just said Dad don't talk like that to me please it doesn't make me feel comfortable. Everyonce in awhile I just break down and I don't understand, I don't know if it's just me but I'm not wanting to get married. I do but I don't cause I know so many people who have gotten divorced and it just hurts my heart. I talk to my friend about it every so often. I just don't know if anyone really knows how I feel. I just wish my parents would of explained more to us.
  • Yes. My parents divorced each other when I was 15 and while it was for the best, it was crushing to see my dad move on so quickly to starting another family. After almost a decade, my mother finally found happiness again with her now husband, and I love him like crazy! Their split still affects me by the way I've ended up in relationships with men who also cheat and take me for granted. I'm learning to get better : )
  • Yes, I am. I was 9 when my dad told us over a large pizza, that my mom wouldn't be around for a little while. She had left to be with a family friend whose kids were all the same ages as me and my brothers...we all attended the same little school, in the same little town and it was awful. My parents fought in custody battles for the next 9 years, until I became emancipated by joining the coast guard. Their divorce screwed me up when it came with dealing with life's issues as a teenager and young adult...my way of dealing with anxiety was by developing an eating disorder that I had to fix on my own b/c my mother didn't want to deal with it, either. My parents were selfish back then and they're still stuck in their own heads, now that it's been over 20 years. They argue about visiting with their grandchildren now and complain about each other still. I'm currently avoiding my mother (she "cut me off" again over something she disagreed with)and my stepfamily b/c my life is a lot easier without the drama and the phoniness. I hate my synicism towards the situation and I hate that my family is so dysfunctional. Divorce is a nightmare only when the parents are jerks.
  • I am 31 and was 9 when my parents got a divorce. It was hard to go through at the time, but i could not imagine them together. They got married young and i think that was the problem, i guess just make sure you are with the right person before you get married. I think it made me grow up faster due to the change in home and school, i have a great relationship with both parents and we all ended up living with my Dad! It in part has made me who i am;0)
  • Yes, but the divorce was final while I was still too young to remember. I didn't meet my father until I was twenty-four. I know I would have been [much] better off never meeting him at all. +5
  • My mom and dad got divorced when I was 6. I don't know what kind of life we would have had if they didn't. My dad was a big party animal and never helped my mom out. We hardly ever got to see her because she kept 3 jobs to take care of us and my dad hardly ever had one. And when he did, he would drink his paycheck away or use it for pot. I have a lot of issues with my father. He used to bring his girlfriends home to meet us while mom was at work. And I remember him beating the hell out of me and my sister and brother with his belt, just for getting loud. Hell we were kids. After they divorced I was diagnosed with a malformation in my brain which causes epilepsy and the doctor wanted both parents there, because there was a possibility of surgery if the seizures didn't stop. My dad thought that me being sick was going to cost him money, so he disappeared out of state for 3 months. I'm 24 years old and my dad is so far behind in his child support that he's still paying it...and will until I'm 32....but I let my mom have it because she raised me and paid for everything. My mom got remarried to one of her childhood friends. He is the best guy in the world. I call him Dad. He's amazing. I still love my real father very much. But he makes little effort to be in our lives. If the divorce has affected me in any way it has given me the notion to beware of men. And I've often ended up with people that are a lot like my dad.
  • I was pretty young when my parents divorced, but it didn't affect me so much because I don't remember, one time in my life, my parents ever being happy together. During their divorce there were way too many big things happening to me at the time for me to be able to make much sense of anything. We recently moved to Canada from France before the divorce, and stayed in two different hotels (Plus one convent, I'm totally serious.) until the house was ready, which means I switched to two different French immersion schools in like not even a year and had to learn to speak English if I wanted to communicate with just about anyone. When the house finally was ready, my parents decided they couldn't stand each other anymore so there goes the house, so it was more moving for me again. With all that crap I think that my mind went comatose and I simply didn't take in anything that was happening to or around me. Good thing I wasn't a teenager, it's apparently worse then. ;/
  • Drugs. Lack of ambition and focus in life. Low self-esteem. Two things more than anything else... 1. Growing up with an alcoholic mother. I can't say with certainty that the divorce caused or exacerbated the alcoholism but it sure looks like it played a role. 2. Lack of experiences. Where many other men had fathers who taught them and introduced them to many things in life, I relied on bosses for the most part. Perhaps one of the reasons why I’ve had good relationships with most of my bosses is because I end up viewing them as a role model and a father-figure of sorts.
  • My parents finally separated when I was 15 and were divorced by the time I was 17. They really should have done it a lot sooner. I really can't remember any "happy times" with my parents together during my childhood. When we went on vacation or to do anything fun when we were very young... it was with one or the other, not both. My father was horrible towards my mother for most of my childhood and it just got worse when she finally decided that she had enough and started to fight back. When that happened, he started taking his aggressions out on me and my brothers. I'm not sure that the divorce affects me still, but growing up in that situation definitely taught me that I never want that type of relationship. I will NEVER treat my significant other the way that my father treated my mother. And, I will NEVER treat my children the way that he treated me.
  • Yes. The divorce doesn't affect me as much now. Moreso when they were together. And right before the divorce and therafter, my Mom was an example of parental alienation. Basically, this means that through verbal and non verbal thoughts, actions and mannerisms, a child is emotionally abused (brainwashed) into thinking the other parent is the enemy (my Father). This ranges from bad mouthing the other parent in front of the children, to withholding visits, to pre-arranging the activities for the children while visiting with the other parent. She was so bitter in the marriage and after, my poor Father was hardly ever at home. So I'm actually okay with the divorce, but at the time~ it was sort of awful.

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