• In no less than 30 words, would you explain to me the basics of particle and quantum physics, and how studies in these fields may affect human life in the decades to come?
  • If Jesus stole your candy bar, would you kick him in the shins?
  • What came first, Jesus or Dinosaurs?
  • Q:What do you think Barney is? A:Wrong. A tired old man it a purple dinosaur costume. Q:What do you think Bigbird is? A:Wrong. A tired old man in a yellow bird costume. Q:What do you think the Telletubbies are? A:Wrong. A bunch of tired old gay people in their normal garb.
  • You're getting nutty answers because you are giving no context. Typical questions: How did you break the lamp? And why did you skip school? Have you seen the car keys? Why don't you clean up your room. I did once ask a kid with a helium balloon how she was able to make it float. She was thrilled to think someone thought she was doing it. But, really. Give us a context.
  • Are you married? Will you drive me to the store please? Why does the sun come up in the morning? How do airplanes fly? Are you full of blood?
  • What is the best thing that happened today? What is the worst thing that happened today?
  • "Can you lick your elbow?"

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