Yes. They weould have lost my trust.

yeah because i would never look at them with the same respect and trust as i did before.

It takes years to build a truly solid relationship. I couldn't let that go for one mistake without at least trying to repair the situation. When truly dedicated to each other for the long run, I think a couple can get through nearly anything.

Yes the trust has gone out of the relationship,i wouldnt trust them again.

If i truely loved them i would try to fight my wanting to break up with them but eventually i would probably come to mind that i would leave them

I would be so devastated and hurt and angry. the mistrust would eventually break the relationship down to fighting and mistrust all the time. there is no excuse to me. if you do it once, how do i know you won't do it again? no matter what it would be better to end it now. maybe they will learn not to do that again to someone.

YES, once trust is broken it can never be repaired

Yup, adios, I deserve better.

What was their name again? I've already forgotten. LOL ; )

yes, once a cheater alsways a cheater

yes, once a cheater alsways a cheater

He'd be gone so fast he wouldn't know what hit him. No second chances there.

yes , trust is the only thing that can sustain a relationship over a long period of time.cheating destroys that trust. if u want to stay with the person make them do a bunch of rediculous stuff(like streak a crouded restaraunt).this will prove they feel horrible and that they will do anything to regain your trust. plus u both would be able to gat a good laugh out of a situation that would otherwise haunt u both.

Probably! Because if you can't trust them then there is no reason to be with them!

Yes , the relationship will never be the same and I don't care what anyone says. I look on it as a massive betrayal and as the cliche goes 'there's plenty more fish in the sea '.

I'd ask questions. Then they would be gone.

For sure. And I would get rid of their genitals as well!

You have to make the decision to either get rid of them or not. The questions about the affair will only haunt you, you never want to know the details or the circumstances, whether you think you do or not...its best just to leave...unless you are married and have kids, then there might be the need for an attempt, but would that even be for the right reasons

You bet I would , YES

immediately

If we love, we always try to find exuse for such persons...

No.

If you can live with having NO control over whether he cheats or not (like the wife of an alcoholic having no control over whether the alcoholic's drinking), and being totally OK with that, then stay. If that's too much for you, it's time to consider other options.

I wouldn't. My boyfriend cheated on me but i have him another chance and i made him feel like SHIT about it!, now were as great as ever and i trust him alot more because i know he is truly sorry for what he did and he would never want to hurt me like that again.

ABSOLUTELY! I respect too much to let someone do that to me! It takes years to build up trust, and seconds to destroy it. Most people don't change so second chances don't matter.

Nope. Need to know WHY, and if we can fix the problem. (for Marriage, especially with kids... for BF/GF I'd still want to know why, and depends on how deep we were into the relationship.)

No. Call me a masochist, but I need to know details so that my mind doesn't run away with itself and make the issue bigger than it was.

No questions asked...just good bye.

Yep ...Yep ... Yep ...right away with no questions asked :-)

Yes, definately. I stayed with my ex for far too long, everyone is different but it will never be the same and you will have a hard time trusting him and in my experience you can become someone you don't like being as you will feel insecure. Move on and find someone that deserves you.

I would, and I will be honest I am the kind of person that I have eyes only for my man but at the same time we are human and imperfect therefore thier is always someone that would raize an eyebrow.....but you never cross that line of love and respect and because you know that the grass always seem greener on the other end but clearly never is...so who gives you the right to go ahead and cross the line and disrespect me!!! obviously if you did, I never meant that much to you.

Yes, because I trust completely or not at all. It's the only way a healthy relationship can work. Once the trust is broken it's over! Jack

I've never been cheated on as far as I know and I really think I need to be in the situation first to truly know what I would do. It's easy to say "Yes, I would so break up with him", but the reality is that a lot of the people who say they would wouldn't. Maybe I'm wrong.

no, thats not a way to go... its always time to get rid of them and why then keep asking the questions to yourself and wondering why they did it. To be honest i think it would never be easy just to get rid of the person you loved even if they cheated on us with no questions answeres. if you realize that dont have regrets or still lie to you about the situation then yes say 'bye' even if its heartbreaking... but at the same time,I beliEve that ANY problem can be overcome when two people willingly communicate and its never to late to start to communicate.

Get rid of them:)

Absolutely! I'm so done dealing with that crap!

Yes. You teach people how to treat you. If you take back a cheater, they learn it's okay and will do it again GUARANTEED. If you ask questions, you're wasting time you could be spending in a new meaningful relationship.

Yup, I've been cheated on before and I don't have time for the BS.

Well I am a very inquisitive person and therefore am inclined to ask questions... but I would also get rid of them right away.

I used to think it depended on the circumstances of the cheating, length of our relationship to that point, if they had cheated before, and other factors. If I really thought it was just a mistake and they were genuinely remorseful about it, I would definitely give them a second chance. Nowadays though... no 2nd chances, no matter how much I wanted them in my life. I have instituted a strict zero-tolerance policy on cheating from this point forward.

No doubt. There would be no point to wasting time with them.

Now I would, yes. I've been cheated on and screwed over long enough. Now I know I can't settle for less, and cheating is DEFINITELY less, and unacceptable.

That would depend upon how honest they were prepared to be in the aftermath. I'm going through this myself at the moment and all I can say is that I'm glad I didn't make any rash decisions as with each passing day I feel stronger in myself after the pain of the disloyalty, lies and humiliation and when I am stronger I will make a decision based on feeling secure in myself. I'm not really thinking about what he wants anymore. I'm putting myself first for the first time in four years. Take your time and when you feel stronger you will answer your own question.

Yeah. I think so. But I cannot know for sure as I have never been in that situation.

I always allow for second chances. Third chances as well. Though I have been fucked over before, I try to remain positive about individual people and push my view of people as a whole to the side.

Depends. On a boyfriend/girlfriend level, probably yes. On a marriage level, depending on how long the marriage is and what problems could have caused the other one to stray, maybe. If kids are involved, no. I would try to work past it.

Here in the U.S., there is a TV program: "Cheaters". The program is contacted by Husbands who suspect their wife is cheating on them. Wives who suspect their husband is cheating on them. Lovers who suspect they are being cheated on. Once in a while a sibling contacts the program for a brother or sister. The program uses "licensed detectives" to videotape and records the activity of the cheater. They have night-penetrating/sensitive cameras. They record telephone conversations. They have the client install very small motion-sensitive cameras in the home or apartment. Once in a while the client installs GPS devices on vehicles. Many times the cheater's identity is blurred or withheld. Once the evidence is accumulated, the host speaks with the client. Naturally, the client wants to confront the cheater. When the cheaters are first confronted, here are what the great majority of them say: "He/She is just a friend. "He/She is my friend." "He/She is my customer." When shown the evidence: "You're not allowed to do that!" ----- OH YES, they are!!!!! THE BEST ones: "That's not me! That's my twin!" "You (the client who called "Cheaters" and set-up the cheating spouse) were supposed to die or be dead! We love each other!" For anyone who ever saw it, there are ALWAYS Qs. I'm in the same boat with everyone else. I want to know "Why?" Some of the answers: "You're always working. You never have time for me." "You don't work. You have to grow-up and get a job." "I don't love you any more." "We don't talk any more." "He/She pays more attention to me than you ever did." "You're a drunk." "You're an addict." "I just used you. I don't need you any more." Bottom Line: Everyone wants 'to have his/her cake and eat it, too'. Many times it just doesn't happen that way. I only saw one episode when the suspected cheater wasn't a cheater. The grandson was bringing his girlfriend into his grand parents' home to do what comes naturally! What happens? Sometimes there is reconciliation - with counselling. Many times they permanently separate. Many times, the cheater appears on a later episode and presents his/jer side of the story. Thanks for asking your Q! I enjoyed answering it! VTY, Ron Berue Yes, that is my real last name! Sources: Because you asked.

I would not get rid of her. I would definitely try to understand what it was that led her astray and work through it with her. The love we have for one another has been built over more than a decade, but even if our relationship was new, I'd still want to show my support and forgiveness. No one is perfect and mistakes can be made. If the cheating has gone on for a while, I might still stay with her, depending on her willingness to stop doing it.

I have no idea how many times I have answered this question on Yahoo Answers and now on AB. There are many reasons for "cheating" some understandable some not. Women tend to have more problems with this because of their makeup. Men are visual creatures and will look and even desire a woman that they find to their liking. Affair rates tend to be about 70% women and 80% men at sometime during their marriage have affairs during their marriages. Cheating is a lie and not good, it would be much better to have an open marriage and remove the "cheating" term from the marriage. Some of you were just turned off by my statement. But read the following bit of information and maybe you will understand what I am trying to say... http://inkaboutit.homestead.com/affairs.html Here is a bit of information especially for those whom believe Biblical principles against this: http://inkaboutit.homestead.com/sharingwife.html I hope this helps with the many other answers given.

Now, I would. But a couple of years ago I was engaged to a man who cheated (A LOT). I did not end the relationship as soon as I found out--it took almost a year for me to call off our wedding. I'm slow, but I smartened up before it was too late. I consider what he put me through as emotional abuse.

NO way - it is unacceptable, I think any self respecting individual has got to turn their back and move on - the next best thing may be even better!

Nope. No one including myself is flawless yo...

I would cheat on him too, and make sure that he found out about it, them leave him and just move on with my life with nothing to regrete!

i am getting to old to play games - NEXT!

I would end it, the first time someone cheats is the hardest time on the conscious, also the one that cheated will develop trust issues with the other, it is never a good idea to keep going because once you cheat, your always a cheater.

nope...ill ask first WHY!!!

i was cheated on by my bf of a year and a half. turns out he had another gf before we even got together. he used to go see her now and again when i thought he went to visit his sister. i felt like our whole relationship was a lie. she had no idea about me. he told me he was really sorry and he has changed, but not before he saw her one last time and had sex with her. i told him it was over, but then i decided to give him a second chance. i still have lots of doubts and distrust however. he wants me to trust him again because he says he is doing the right thing, but its hard. i keep asking myself, if he were sorry why did he go back to see her. i want to trust him again, or else i feel it will end. its tough though. we're working on it. if he cheats another time and i find out, i wouldnt even begin to try trusting him again. its too hard as it is.

I would ask why first... I would definitely want to know about the circumstances that led them to cheat first. But then I would probably get rid of them afterwards.

hell yea, we dont love them hoes

I'll ask questions first, then get rid of her. I've done it before and I'll do it again.

No questions, and put lime where the body is buried.:0

no. I'd ask lots of questions. just for my own education, I would still leave.

I would most definetly, get rid of that person. come on now? I dont need to waste my time. I'll never be able to trust the person ever again. no matter how hard I try.

Yep, don't need nasty thoughts in my head.

Yes, cause I would never trust them again.

PLEASE DO NOT GIVE OR TAKE AWAY ANY POINTS FOR THIS "Answer" Thanks very much! Sorry, this wouldn't post as a "Comment" Hi! I do my best to provide helpful answers. I'm very happy you awarded that point. As you "climb" the AB Ladder and achieve the various Levels VERY gradually the ability to add more point to your ratings will increase. Thanks for boosting my spirit! You REALLY helped to make my day much better! :-) :-) :-) :-) Very Truly Yours, Ron Berue :-) :-) :-) :-) Welcome to AnswerBag! This IS THE BEST Q&A site on the web! You get points for your Qs. Without taking anything away from you or your rating, you are expected to give points for our answers. All you have to do is click your mouse on "+" sign or "-" sign above the "Rate Answer". I HOPE you enjoy your time on AB. By the way, when there are times when you might be a little bored or you want a change of pace, PLEASE visit the "Sillyville Club". Simply type s-i-l-l-y-v-i-l-l-e in the box next to the "GO" button. Click on the "GO" button and you'll be in Sillyville! Very Truly Yours, Ron "THE Official Spokesman of Sillyville"

yep!

Of course! Cheating isn't allowed. I won't tolerate it.

Oh I most definitely would...of course I would make sure I knew they cheated on me, but yeah if I was sure they cheated, it's over, no second chances.

I used to say that I would, but I can't get rid of my boyfriend. I love him too much. He means everything to me. The circumstances were explained to me and I know the girl he cheated with. I can understand how he could get tricked into doing it with her. She is manipulative like that. No, I didn't get rid of him. I can't.

I would do some research first, but I always have ended up leaving them because I cant be with someone who willingly hurt me like that. Taylor Swift said it best. "You should have said no!" I love that song!

I would ask things, then if we can work things out, I would stay.

If you know for a fact that he did. Of course I would get rid of him. Might be hard, but you deserve a lot better.

Yes..My ex did that..met his mistress and it was done..gotta go its been nice have a good life see ya bye bye! :)

Yes, I would get rid of him right away, but I would make sure I find a way to make him feel VERY SORRY!

if you love them so so much you always have that thought in your head that they will change and they can change but not without your trust or love but how can they expect you to trust or love them hhhmmm its a difficult question!!!

yes.

Ive always had a simple belief, that if something like that were to happen, all it meant was I did not know her like I thought I did and she simply was not the right one for me anyway. I would be upset of course but would feel sorry for her and be glad that it was not a lot longer b4 I found out. You are either faithful or your not, your a cheater or your not. But once a cheater always a cheater, there is no need to relive the details.

I would have to look at all the circumstances that led up to him or her cheating then decide.

Yes... as I answer before on similar question I may forgive but I don't want anymore.

Cheating ALWAYS comes as a direct result of poor communication or no communication at all. Councelling (with both parties present) can cure a lot of ills. After years of marriage, I wouldn't throw it away at the drop of a hat. There are many things to consider.

Yup buh bye, thats after i beat him.

Sort've... there would be questions, but they would be more along the lines of "You didn't think this through very well, did you?" and "Can you guess what's going to happen now?"

I would see if we could solve our problems together first. If not, out the door.

First question: How do you really know if you have been cheated on? This is not meant to be a silly question. People assume they have been cheated on based on certain assumptions that they assume they already know the answers to. But do they really know what they think they know? People believe what they want to believe, about anything and about anybody, at any time. Question your assumptions before proceeding further. Wisdom can always be gained in the process. Humility as well.

I would dump her in a heartbeat, no matter who she was or how long we had been together. Personally, I cant be with someone that I cant trust.

I would dump them right after they paid for a medical exam to check for STDs.

In my situation I couldn't bvecause I love her.. It's sad but I love her too much

In a second. I have no room in my life for scumbags.

I would listen to their excuse, then I would dump them.

It would depend on how I took it at the time, and what the circumstances surrounding it were. I doubt I could deal with it, I have been through it in the past and felt suicidal at time, I think I am personally too sensitive to cope with being cheated on, therefore, I would have to let it go, for the sake of my sanity. The relationship will have been destroyed anyway.

NO- I have promised my husband to love him unconditionally.

I didn't

Almost. Only a damned good explanation would suffice.

yes. i don't even need to hear an explanation. how do you explain betrayal?

If there was sexual involved you should definitely kick them to the curve. If they really love you and said they meant all the wonderful things they said to you then they shouldn't have betrayed you. Once the trust is gone, there's nothing left. However, if they had a thought about someone else and were honest with you, it's up to you whether if you want to stay or leave.

Depends on who it was, how long we were together, and how bad I really liked them, etc.

Yes, immediately if not sooner.

In a heart beat! Right away! Like...right there and then! Nothing to talk about and not one question asked!

Yes. I'm extremely loyal. I don't even look at other guys. I get pissed when my bf lies to me or calls another girl pretty. He even called me another girls name 9x accidentally. I think I should end it asap.