ANSWERS: 47
  • "I need space" means I want to retreat to a place where I can have some "alone time" to explore my feelings. Probably, your boyfriend doesn't have the words yet to say what's really on his mind. Even though you broke up -- you might consider making a deal with him, that you discuss what happened at some point in the not too distant future.
  • It can mean a few different things, mainly: -You're crowding me/ being posessive. I want a bit more freedom -I'm not sure I'm ready for a serious relationship. This has moved quicker than I expected and I'm a bit scared. I need some time to work out what I actually want, rather than just going along with what's happened by default. -I'm worried about other things right now (job, money, family, mental health etc) and I can't devote the time and attention you deserve to you right now. I need to be alone and sort out my problems -I'm just not that into you but I'm trying to find a way to break up that doesn't sound too cruel. Its hard to know which one of these he means, but to be honest, I wouldn't waste too much time trying to find out, you may not like the answer. And knowing isn't gonna bring him back. I suggest you just pick yourself up, get out with your friends, and appreciate the space he's given you. If he's going to come back, he'll come back in his own time, but you won't get him back by pestering and quizzing him. All the best x
  • It means he needs to spend less time with you and more time with himself and/or others.
  • I, meaning him; need, meaning must have for survival; space, meaning distance or area. Often, people confuse their needs with their wants or desires, which have been irrationally elevated in importance. I would suggest you examine closely how you view your desire for this person......have you also irrationally elevated your desire or "want" into a "need"? Hint: The best way to get someone to pull away is to grab them and try to hold on. Keep your suitors at a distance, and they will not be able to claim a need for space until they are firmly entangled in your web. There is no shortage of others from which to pick, so take steps to separate yourself from this person, look honestly at your own self-indulgence, and get on with what you will one day find is a very short life....and take more care in the picking, lest that life be full of wasted time and effort.
  • I dont agree that its just saying he doesn't like you or anything like that.. i remember when i broke up with my boyfriend because i just wanted my space...its really hard to explain...sometimes your confused about things and there is so much going on and its too much so you just need to give some time to clear your mind...but its different for everyone and i dont think saying that he doesn't like her is a very good answer..i loved my boyfriend to death..
  • Goodbye.
  • It's Done and Get Over It, sorry but it's the truth move on to greener pastures.
  • Basically it means just what he says, just not a complete sentence. It is actually: I need space........without you in it. Sorry for your loss........:(
  • I agree with several answers on here and very much related to the first. VERY good advice/input. I think it is very important to not only give him the space he's asking for but as a rule: give him even MORE than he tells you he needs. The only way for him to sort out his feelings is if he does the "rubber band" thing. Meaning, if he pulls away. John Gray, who writes all the "Mars and Venus" books alerts women that men do pull away and advises us not to panic. But if you DON'T pursue him, he will come back. Even if it was to tell you that he's thought things over and he just doesn't think he wants a relationship with you right now, at least the clarity that you need is there. FIGHT the overwhelming urge to get to the bottom of it and to do something about it yourself, even though I know it leaves you feeling very helpless. But if you try to busy yourself with other things and give him all the space in the world, he will have no choice but to naturally decide what to do on his own. Also, sometimes as women we think that it is a good idea if we just send a "friendly" "non serious" message from time to time so they know we're thinking about them while they're taking their space. While this may sometimes be okay, often even the fact that we contacted them is pressure, whether we mean to or not. Another thing that's really important is: If he contacts you after taking some space for himself and he senses that you are mad at him, he will be turned off by that. Or if he anticipates being "in trouble" there's a good chance he won't even bother bouncing back. Stay warm but independent. If you haven't responded at all yet to his request for space, I would recommend telling him something like: "Please take whatever space you need or want. I understand and actually, it will be a good time for me to take some time for myself too. I really appreciate your honesty. :) " And say it with warmth. And then DON'T chase him. That's pretty much all you can do. I know it feels like your hands are tied. But too much action on your part will not give him the environment he needs to make a decision that you actually need from him anyway. Right? Best of luck to you. :)
  • ugh, i AM THERE RIGHT NOW. I actually broke down and called him today after two days. I left a voice message. I really wish I didn't. We were high school sweethearts and have finally gotten back together after marriages,children, divorce and several bad relationships. He said how he wants to be with me and have a nice life, family etc. Everything was good and then BAM! space time. So, I pretty much broke up with him. I didn't know what else to do. I'm not a doormat. But, I do love him and always have. So, I guess if it was meant to be.... But I definately won't be calling again. Maybe he really does need some time to clear his head. I of course assumed there is someone else. time will tell.
  • simple ...he fell out of love with you and is looking for a way out ...sorry
  • He may have wanted to break up with you and made up that excuse.... ~or~ He needed some personal time. I don't know what you were doing, but it could simply mean that you were around him and on him too much. Maybe he got fed up with you... I'm really sorry to hear that.... {{{{{{{{{{HUG}}}}}}}}}}
  • I need space means that he is entitled to his own ideas, interests likes, dislikes and pursuits. He may feel that you think his ideals are subject to your approval, and that you rarely approve, if true, people such as yourself tend to be lonely.
  • I need space basically means BACK OFF. Leave the man alone. I can't define the reason why he wants you to back off, because it could be anything.
  • Its a guys way of saying he wants to bang someone else.
  • Space is for you to think things over and figure out whats new. Iam actully going through a break right now, and I know its hard, but Just keep pushing forward and in the end you'll get him back. If its for good, it'll take a while but after a while you'll be okay. The whole "space" thing....to be honest..it sucks. But you know I'd hope he knew what he wanted and he talks to you about everything!
  • This has just happened to me. I would like to know what the outcome was?? Please advise. I am very upset!
  • i am going thru somewhat the same thing i met my boyfriend at work he lives in pa and i'm in indiana i'm 49 and he's 46 we talked and became best of friends and never slept togehter for 4 months we have been seeing each other for almost a year and he was to move here in about 2 weeks he recently had prostate surgery for cancer and that was depressing him but he came back out a month after surgery we i thought has a great time and talked about him moving here in just a couple of weeks when he got home the next day he told me he didn't want this anymore and needed to be alone he would call me when he was ready to talk..i was devasted by all this i needed to know what happen and needed answers he was everythng to me i called and he would not take my calls even though he said he wanted to still be friends when i finally got him to answer he said why can't you let me call when i'm ready i told you i don't want this anymore and i need to be alone...he said if i kept calling he would change his number...he loved me to death and told me so just the day before all this happened..when i think back he did make comments a couple of times of feeling he needed to get back home for his kids who are 18 and 22 i really think he still loves me but not sure what is really going on should i just forget about him and say why would he treat me this way nowing how much i loved him...i'm lost on how to go on here
  • Some guys just need to have alone time. We as women don't understand. Then we get clingy and whiney about it which just makes it worse. Then they get mad. He prob just didn't want to take time to deal with a realationship right now. Seems they can only focus on one thing at a time, and if they put everything into the relationship then other things get neglected like bills, or homework, friends family.
  • generally it means 'go away'
  • he's lost that lovin feelin'
  • I hate you and want you out of my apartment
  • I'm tired of you! I don't think most guys use this phrase...more of a polite female thing....but, I am just generalizing
  • He says: I need space... He means: I don't have the balls to break up with you, so I'm hoping you'll just move on, and then I don't ever have to talk to you again.
  • did you see warnings signs earlier? it probably means that your affection is suffocating him, so he feels that he needs more space. either he wants be by himself or needs to some time to think about the relationship. don't pressure him. if he loves you, he will call you.
  • maybe hes finding the relationship a bit boring?
  • it's like if he said: we need to talk, or i don't think this will go ahead
  • He doesn't want to be with you. Give him his space, find someone that wants to be with you.
  • he'a too cowardly to give you the real reason and too stupid to come up with sunthing more original than that !! you better off without him
  • In my opinion, "I need space" is usually a translation of "I want out of this relationship but I'm too much of a coward to say it because I know it will hurt your feelings & lead to a discussion I dont want to have." I wish people would just say what they mean and lay the cards on the table....so frustrating! Come on guys....we can handle the truth.....
  • Isnt this the same as asking for a break??? Generally it means just that they want to have time alone to think about where this relationship is going and if its going any where,it will aslo give them time to reflect whether they miss you and want you. In this time id think it wise for you to do the same.I dont feel though in my opinion that while on a break or "space" that either partner should sleep with some one else this isnt the answer. Give your partner space,but dont let them make you wait too long arranage together a mutural agreement,good luck
  • "I need time to find someone I can dump you for."
  • Some relationships are "smothering", especially if the couple are together 24/7/365. People need time to be alone. Many can do this in their own home (say one of them has a room they can go to to just sit, to watch what they want on TV, to listen to their own music, to rest.) Some relationships, especially those that started very young, need a break, to go out on their own and prove they can "do it themselves". Usually it's the woman that leaves in this case, but it CAN be the man. This DOES NOT mean they won't get back together. And there are those who want to go out and "sow some wild oats" (NOTE: NOT necessarily sex) before they "settle down" Then there are those, as mentioned by others, who want to break up, but don't want the "scene" if they just said it. I don't know which of the above situations fits yours. So I cannot translate for him. Sorry. Good luck. ;-)
  • Space means leave him alone.
  • Then you need space as well...the space will give you the insight to realize that is not the person for you but rather an experience you should appreciate. onward and forward, it is ok....you learned something and experienced something good, take it with you to your next level.
  • It depends. Most of the time it means they want to end the relationship.
  • it mean you were over-floding him with your presence, calling him every day, being over every day, asking him about stuff everything, but of course, this could just be an excuse.
  • It means he didn't have a better excuse so the nicest thing he could think of was that he needed space... you didn't need him, anyhow... Go find you a great one!
  • I need space means you're smothering me get lost.
  • "I need space" translates to "I have found someone else."
  • Ihate this "spae" thing too. I translate it to mean he/she needs time to thing about the relationship, plain and simple..Communicate and drag it out as to why he/she needs space!
  • to me space means its over,i either want to date other people keep u hanging or just i dont want to be in a relationship any more, its a cowards way or ending it. my ex fiancee told me this back in March and not heard from him since. Best thing to do is leave him alone, the more u contact and chase the more u will push him away, if he is being honest with u with the "space" thing. Only time will tell on this one!
  • He's not ready to commit to being with only one person. You need to let him go. No one wants to feel obligated being in a relationship. It should be willingly.
  • most of the time he means that something is on his mind and he doesn't have time for you and he doesn't want to make you upset by not hanging out wiht you enough so i would say that he means no0 harm he jsut doesn't want to hurt u!
  • Well I can kinda relate to this. But Im pretty sure it means your crowding him is it that your around him all the time calling non stop. It can mean many diffrent things. Just give him space act like you dont care and it will come back.
  • In other words he's gotten all he wanted and is ready to move on. Do yourself a favor and forget about him and go find someone who cares about you and not just themselves.
  • Sure, there isn't enough time for you and my XBox.......

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