Cheaters don't deserve anything. Trust was broken and can never really be restored. You can ask for a second chance, but that's up to the other.

Alot of people drink "one too many"..you still KNOW what you're doing.

In my experience, there are no "rules" for cheating. My ex cheated on me once when she was extremely drunk, and we talked about it a lot. She was genuinely sorry, made a mistake, and was truly remorseful about it. I gave her another chance and after a little while of rebuilding trust, things were great for the remainder of the relationship. We broke up later for totally different reasons. Anyway, I believe in 2nd chances but not 3rds.

There are no accidental cheatings. Either you cheated or you didn't. And for me, there would be no second chance.

Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me. I think everyone deserves a second chance if they are truly sorry. But it depends on the situation, too. If you really love the person, would you want them to give you a second chance if you screwed up?

personally it's up to you. i can't forget that kind of thing, but i'd forgive it. i don't know if i could let somebody get the chance to cut me that deep again though. them being drunk shows their irresponsibility as well to me, but this is a very personal choice. if they were truly sorry, and you're willing to give them that chance, you're a better person than i am. i wouldn't give back the trust completely though. perhaps they should earn it slowly. if they're worth it, then it should be no problem for them to earn it back if you're dealing with this i'm sorry for your situation i hope things turn out for the best for you

Did they accidentally fall on top of the other person naked? I would never give a 2nd chance, when it comes to cheating. You will never truly ever forgive them, and will think about it everyday. The only way they could earn your trust is you were by their side 24 hours a day.. Wer they sorry the got caught or sorry for devastating the other person with their selfish act.

I believe in second chances....but NOT when it comes to cheating. I have enough respect and morals not to do it to him then I should be getting the same in return.

Alcohol helps remove inhibitions. So, although previously inhibited from cheating, the urge was irresistable under the influence. And would've probably surfaced anyway. Move on.

That's a big Hell no. There is no such thing as accidental cheating. Being intoxicated is a poor excuse for getting naked and doing things with someone you are not in a comitted relationship with.. Unless you are completely passed out cold (in which case it wouldn't be cheating but rape on the part of the person who was no passed out) you still know the difference between right and wrong. You dson't suddenly forget you are married or in a comitted relationship just because you are drunk. Anyone who could stoop as low as to break the bond of trust their partner has put in them to be faitful to them doesn't deserve a second chance. If you really and truly love your partner stop and think is this few moments or hours of pleasure I will have with someone who is not my partner worth losing my partner over if I get caught? Hopefully the answer is no and if it is yes then your relationship is in deep trouble and you need to get out before you cheat.

No I would not give them a second chance. Once is one to many for me. There are no accidents in cheating.

Being drunk is not an accident or an excuse -- that individual has a drinking problem, so long as that's there, anything could happen... the only way I'd trust this person is if they stopped drinking.

I might give him a chance..but the pain will only get bigger and bigger in my heart and someday I'll just walk away

I'd only believe a 'drunk accident' theory if they stopped drinking. Otherwise I'd assume that they are looking for more 'drunk accidents'. I often think of getting drunk just so I can use it as an excuse ...

Everyone deserves a second chance, being we're all human and prone to making mistakes. Infidelity, even while intoxicated, is not an accident. It's like when someone uses a degrading term and says it was a bad choice of words. The word never should have come up as a choice to utter. Likewise, someone with character and intergrity will remain honest, alcohol or not. That said, this may have been a valuable, if expensive, lesson to the person and they may never repeat the mistake again. One would think a relationship built on a strong foundation could withstand a single shock. The answer to a question like this depends of so many individual factors. How long has the couple been together? Are they married? Are their children? Do the plan to make a life together or are they simply dating? In the end, it depends on what the individuals in the relationship want.

I dont beleive you can cheat by accident,nor do i believe you can blame it on being drunk. A second chance would depend on what the reasons were,some times there are circumstances like getting lack of love and attention im not saying its right to go and cheat because of this,because you can speak with your partner about it.Every one is human and im afraid lust is a human trait!

I think everyone deserves a second chance. No one deserves a 3rd or 4th chance

Getting drunk in a situation where a cheating person would be tempted to cheat is the first chance. Actually cheating was the second chance. Since someone cannot accidently get drunk to accidently cheat I would say no, unless they were roofied, poor thing.

i agree with the whole being drunk is not an excuse and cerainly was no accident! BUT... i have been the person to get drunk and cheat on my boyfriend! i told him as soon as i woke the next day and not once used the fact i was drunk as an excuse...there is no xcuse its a wrong thing to do! second chance...i think every1 deserves a second chance but only a second any more cheating and thats that i feel the reason i cheated was 2 me the relationship was going nowhere and we was only keeping eachother company untill he moved to another country see he was determinned to move and did not want a official relationship as soon as the sex was over i felt awful and as soon as i got up in the morning i called my bf arranged to meet and told him my actions and what my reasons were (im not condoning what i did. it was wrong) i got the second chance and our relationship grew stronger and stronger guess what, he did not move and we r now engaged! i think being able to forgive is the biggest issue here are you able to look at him everyday knowing where hes been?! also depends on the way you found out, did he tell you or some1 else?! if he told you then i would say give it a shot you will not trust him 4 a while and even maybe not be so close with him. all you can do is try, if you stay together and it don't work out theres no regrets if you leave him it may have worked...but you will never know! good luck and talk to him about it get his reasons only you can say if you can see a future if he really is sorry he mite never do it again i know i realized how much i wanted to be with my boyfriend after i cheated and felt lucky to have such a great guy!

everybody deserves a 2nd chance and if needed a 3rd one

Nope! The Coffin Cheaters have had more than enough chances to redeem themselves!

I think that everyone deserves a second chance because EVERYONE makes a mistake. I dont think that cheating is an accident but i do think that being drunk can really affect the choices that a person makes. If they were sorry and wanted to earn back the trust then yes. i feel like forgiving someone is the right thing to do. We all human and things happen. Although cheating isnt acceptable, forgiveness is.

If my girlfriend cheated on me that would destroy my trust and i dont think that i could give her a second chance. Without trust there is no point in having a relationship.

Drunk or not, I think cheaters should get another chance. I would get mad because I was not invited. However, I think that sexual urges have nothing to do with the love 2 people have. We all like to "make love" but sometimes you just need to F*c%!!!

Whether it was an accident or not or because she was drunk or whatever the F%@$; CHEATING IS CHEATING. Trust me people, especially the guys of you!!(Maybe because I am a guy). I've been through this before and I forgave her for cheating once. She was sooo incredibly sorry and started crying and shit... But girls are MASTERS at faking. She made me live in a fake relationship for 2 years after that, to discover later that she did it again "a bunch of times :'(", as she said!!! And guess what... We're still together.. Reason? I have a veerrry weak heart and I love her so much!! stupid huh?... Point is... PEOPLE, please... If you wanna live a good life, a happy life, a not so fu**ing depressing life, if you don't wanna sit there every night imagining her on top of him saying "YESS F%@$ ME uhhhh"; just dump her AS VERY SOON AS you find out that she cheated. Trust me, trust the 26 years old experienced weak hearted "doc".

If it was genuinely un-intended sure give them a second chance to prove their sorry. but my general moto is " once a cheater, always a cheater " If they do it again.. Be gone with them.

Accidental intercourse or bj...are you kidding me? The answer is no, no and NO. Cheating is cheating. The trust is gone.

IMO, no There needs to be definite consequences to cheating so that people don't do it. If people get used to one freebie then of course they aren't going to be careful with getting drunk until they've screwed up once. As a rule, people will generally try to get away with whatever they can so if you offer a "get out of jail free card", someone is going to use it

IMO, cheaters are selfish and when they cheat they are disrespectful to you. Being selfless is a must to make a relationship work in the long run and respect is necessary in any kind of relationship. A person who has neither of these characteristics will never be a good partner - or they will seem like a good partner and will find better ways to hide their flaws. Selfish people don't seem to mind living a lie. Watch for other ways a bf/gf displays selfishness and disrespect to other people, I promise you will find examples. If they treat other people this way, they will treat you this way too - although, like I said, they might just learn to hide it better. It's a lot easier to move on from someone than to hang around and wait for them to become different people.

Oh, hell no. There is no such thing as accidently cheating. And the only thing they're sorry about is getting caught.

For me, Cheating is cheating-- drunk or not. If your too drunk to know you are having sex with someone other than you spouse or SO, you should be too drunk to rise to the occassion. Forgive me, but a penis does not have a brain or a mind of it's own. My BF of 3 1/2 yrs cheated. Granted he was incarcerated for 6 yrs. I put my life on hold for him & waited for him "FAITHFULLY". I went to his house to visit him at 10:30am, he was with another woman, but he's sorry. Sorry b/c he got caught. Then 4 months later I found out he was living with another woman, but was telling me he loved me. In between the year time span...He would tell me he loved me and we would met up "sometimes". He just needed some time he said, so I was willing to give it to him. But I never expected him to cheat on me. I have no clue how many times he did it. I caught him in lie after lie. Sent him a text once and told him I was in town and wanted to see him. He texted back and said he was in a different town. Little did he know I was sitting across the street watchin him, and a female got out of his car.. LOL. Now, for the past 2 months he calls about once a week or so wanting to work things out with me. It's been HELL for me since April 2007. I live with the pain every single day. Do I love him, YES-VERY MUCH! Do I trust him-- NO & probably never will. The man I love so much and adored I will never be able to spend my life with b/c of the lies, infidilty, deceit, and direspect. He may chance and might already have, but his changing may be for someone else and not me. This has been my experience. Prison has nothing to do with being unfaithful. I could have handled giving him space to be around his friends & do things for a while, but having sex with other females and basically acted as though I didn't exist until you felt guilty is not acceptable. If he wanted sex.... I was out here --all he had to do wa pick up the phone & I would have rocked his world !!!!! Willingly taking off your clothes and hers, laying between anothers legs is a decision you make and you have to life with the consequences. A second chance, well I'm not strong enough to handle it a second time. It's been over a year and I'm still not over it, seems like yesterday. But you have to make that decision and life with it.

This is 2 Tigger. QUick question, if your fiance or husband was unfaithul, would you forgive him or not. He did forgive u, so would u do the same for him. What happened if he had made a mistake, would u forgive him? Would u ever cheat on him again?

HOLD UP. Cheating is NEVER an accident. Furthermore, being drunk is never an excuse.

No..I don't think cheating can be an "accident" and I don't think being drunk is an excuse :)

my b/f of 3 and half years was out one nyt in the local pub and kissed a girl 4yrs younger than me, i never found out, about 2months later a neighbour had told me what happened. TO make matters worse he didnt go home that night, he reckoned he fell asleep in the car.he swore it was only a kiss and had realised what he had done. i forgave him as i could see he was well regretful. a year later i still bring it up every night were out, as i dont fully trust him. i dunno what our future holds as i know he loves me very much but am not sure if my emotions can carry on.

In my personal opinion, I've been cheated on twice and that was it, I walked. The way I see it, alcohol isn't an excuse. If they feel the need to cheat on you, then they don't really love you and 9 times out of 10 they are going to do it again. If you sit there and let them get away with it, they are going to do it again and blame the same reasons.

No. And accidentally..?? There is no such thing as accidentally cheating. They themselves CHOSE to drink and CHOSE to put themselves in that environment. It was no accident. Now, if you think you can fully trust the person again...and they change their behaviors, such as not putting themselves in an environment where they can't control there actions in a responsible manner, then sure...if you wan't (but I wouldn't), give them the second chance. To me, it is just a recipe for disaster......

If you still love him, but only if he gives up drinking.

Deserve? That is for YOU to decide. The problem I see here is calling it an accident because they were drunk. Does that mean if they get drunk again, it MIGHT happen again? (Now they've set a precedence... "I was drunk... I didn't know what I was doing!" - would you accept that excuse again?) Yes... You CAN forgive cheaters if you want... It's happened before, and it will happen again. See http://www.answerbag.com/a_view/2691789 for how to forgive. Earning back the trust will also be something you and they have to work out between you. Some can trust quickly, and some take a while. As you can see by the answers you've gotten, everyone has their own opinion on this. Good luck. ;-)

Accident??? Oh, I get it. He was just laying there minding his own business and his penis accidently fell into her hoo-hoo (tried to keep it PG). I don't buy what he's trying to sell and neither should you. As far as taking him back, that is only a decision that you can make. Trust is something that is built over time and once it has been breached, for some, it could a point of no return. Unless he is willing to accept full responsibility for his actions, i.e.: NOT calling it an accident and blaming alcohol for his actions, I cannot fathom that he is trustworthy.

Sometimes yes, if they are sincerely sorry and truly want to make their marriage work. Why throw a marriage away because one person made a mistake. Neither of them are perfect. Edit: Well, I guess someone doesn't believe in forgiveness. I hope you never do anything wrong that you are sorry about and come across someone who doesn't forgive you.

Every1 Deserves A 2Nd Chance But Onlii iif They Truly Regret What They Did.. If They Dont Show Any Remorse On What They Have Done Then They Aint Sorry At All. Every1 Screws Up And Every1 Does Deserve a 2Nd Chance But Not A 3rd..x

Their is no excuse for betraying the trust of your chosen partner with cheating. No incident of cheating is an accident its not like your driving along and "opps I ran into the back of an suv and ended up with a cock in my mouth! My bad." If you personally believe you have it in you to forgive and learn to trust them again over time sure give them a second chance. But they will do it again cheaters are weak willed.

No, unless you want another go at being disappointed, humiliated, embarrassed and played for a fool! :(

Being drunk is no excuse! Once you break my trust, that pretty much blows the whole relationship!

it really depends because see i had a drug slipped in my drink once andWhen i WAS married back in the day i had to explain this to my husband but he understood because when under a substance even alcohol it effects your brain and your reasoning so if he truely means what he said then give him a shot Always Forgive never forget its not fair to walk around with a heavy heart....so ALWAYS Forgive but everyone deserves a second chance!

1st of all...Cheating is NEVER an accident. 2nd...No I don't believe cheaters deserve a second chance. They're the ones who put themselves in that position so who's to say they wouldn't do it again after having "one too many"? But I'm kind of cynical especially about this topic after having been cheated on several times "by accident" of course.

It is up to the person who was betrayed whether or not they want to give their cheater a second chance. In my book there are no second chances. My wife and I agree that if one of us were to cheat on the other our relationship would be over.

I have been married 27 years and despite many opportunities over the years, my penis has never "accidentally" found itself inside anybody other than my wife. Being drunk doesn't make you do things you don't want to do. It just makes it easier to excuse the things you do want to do. I would be completely dispassionate about this, if you have been together for more than three years and this is his first "accident," then I'd give him a second chance. If you have been together less than that, he obviously can't keep it zipped up and shouldn't be trusted. Hope this helps.

NO the dont deserve it because they will do it again and again even if they promise you that they wont and that it was a mistake, and even if you love them a lot and you feel like you ant to forgive hem its not worth it... trust me I went down that road and she ended up cheating again and again... so trust me you dont want that suffering a second or a third time from the same person

Give them a second chance, they walk all over you. So no they don't.

Cheating is not an accident. If someone is capable of making a decision to have sex and they are fully capable of doing so, then they are also capable of making a decision not to have sex and are fully capable of walking away from such a situation. I think that more often than not, second chances prove to be just that, a second chance .. to do the same thing again.

If you are drunk you still have to unbutton your pants and pull them down, right. Give me a break. People that say they cant remember what happend are lying. Especially if there was and act of sex involved. NO 2nd CHANCES. Only gives them a reason to do it again.

Well i just cheated on my boyfriend on holiday and yes i was intoxicated but i agree it is no excuse although i half knew what i was doing and i didn't think of the consequences at the time but then on the other hand i didnt realise what i was doing...which is dangerous to be that intoxicated. I confronted my boyfriend on the second day i was home as i couldnt cope with the guilt any longer. He was shocked as he has never treated me badly infact he treats me like a princess and i mugged him off. He still doesnt know what to do but i obviously want a second chance and beleive that i deserve one as i know i will never do it again, its not worth it...i could possibly loose the love of my life and my best friend over a drunken antic and the thing ive got to live with is knowing that it was all my fault!

I walked into mine and my boyfriend's bedroom, with my co-worker in MY bed with MY man! They were both drunk. Drunk is no excuse. I have been blackout drunk to the point where i don't remember anyting the next day and have been hit on, and still knew that i had a boyfriend and said no even when asked for just my number!!! it was the worst feeling in the world. I never thought he would ever do something like that to me. He talked to his mother about me being "the one". I had a lot of anger towards him, and no trust. I still gave him a chance but it was not a good experience. It made me very insecure in the relationship. I started snooping through his phone, wallet, even would look around in his vehicle for signs of him cheating on me again. If he didn't answer my call I would freak out. It was the hardest thing i had to go through psychologically. I had to see a therapist. I'm a very happy person and it made me very depressed and suicidal and i got highly addicted to prescription xanax so that i would just sleep about 16 hours a day because i didn't know how to cope. I was no longer physically attracted to him, but felt as though I had to be intimate with him for fear he would be intimate with someone else. I was terrified this would happen to me again. I wish i would have just turned my back and left him out of my life at that point. I never got over it and had to leave him. Giving a second chance is harder for the one being cheated on, not the cheater. Its up to you if you want to put yourself through possibly being hurt again. No one can tell you what to do. If you love them then its worth a try, but its very diffacult.

LOL accident? i'd be more impressed with my man if he manned up and told me no excuses and said that his actions was completely unacceptable...it shows he can take full responsibility.. to make excuses and say that it was an accident because you were drunk... wow.. unbelievable. shows how immature the person still is if he's willing to make excuses to present himself as the victim. take responsibility.. and accept that acquiring trust will not be so easy. i once knew a man who cheated on his wife.. the wife forgave him. but she told him that he had to call her and tell her where he was going if he was going somewhere and tell her what time he expected to be home. the husband was furious saying that it was unacceptable and unreasonable. the wife told him that it was unreasonable and unacceptable for him to cheat on her.. if earning back her trust meant that he had to call in to tell her he was going to be late or going somewhere.. if he really wanted to earn the trust back then this should be a piece of cake. don't whine.. you have an opportunity to win back the love of your life.. take it.

Well i cheated and only by my chating coming out in the open did i learn that he had cheated some years previously. What goes round comes around. Might aswell give a 2nd chance cuz karma will eventually pop up and bite them in the ass anyway!

It is my opinion that cheating is done by free choice and as such cannot be considered an accident. Getting drunk is also done by free choice so i do not accept that as being a valid reason or excuse for poor behavior. . Offering forgiveness to a partner who has betrayed trust within a relationship, is an entirely personal decision and should be based on one's desire to seek a level of inner peace which allows them to move on past the hurt they feel.

SEX is not an accident. Anyone who says it is is a LIAR. Anyway, it depends on the situation.

In my opinion, no, they do not deserve a second chance. Regardless of what the circumstances are, it shows that you don't care about your s/o. I've been down this road before and I gave a second chance, only to have her screw that one up too. I refuse to deal with that load of whale dung again, so if you cheat, even once, your out the door and forgotten faster than last weeks garbage.

yeah once a cheater, always a cheater. you wont ever be able to trust that person the way you did before

Not sure how anyone could "accidentally" "cheat". Do you believe if they are drunk they don't have to be responsible? I don't know - I think what you call "cheating" is pretty natural - the opportunity presents itself and we find it attractive and exciting and go for it. The difference between men and us is we define ourselves more in terms of our relationships so are less quick to do anything that will threaten them. But to expect perfection from anyone is I think only asking for disappointment sooner or later. If we love someone and enjoy being together with him we stay, if we find out he likes or is spending more time and effort on another woman we leave. In the end it becomes a practical matter.