Wasting my time? bf and i are getting serious. he smokes, eats junk, hates exercise and outdoors. i love him but i dont change ppl and can't see myself with someone like that forever. Do I end it now, just deal or try to change it before it's too late?
by 
lustandchaos
ANSWERS: 7
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i think only you can answer that question.. you're obviously with him for a reason. Just beware. YOU want to be happy in the long run.
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hes never changing, get out while you can
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You can't change another person. He has to want to change. Only you can decide if his refusal to do so would be a deal breaker for you. You know what you can live with.
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The only person anyone can ever successfully change, is themselves. If you find yourself feeling claustrophobic stuck indoors with him and his sofa, TV and smoke, then you are already feeling the damage. Before you end it, try an ultimatum in case it works, but don't sentence yourself to 'just deal' - that will only ruin you both in the long run. All you can do is tell him honestly that, although he's a sweetheart and you adore him, you panic at the thought of being dragged down until you are a fat, trapped, couch potato, and you'd sooner leave him than become a sickly and bitter blob. Then its up to him to change himself, or not.
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why prolong the inevitable?
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This here is not about changing. The man is who he is because he chooses to be so in his own way. While you may have expressed feelings to be outdoors with him and for him or to stop smoking (maybe, I dont know) this should have been dealt with before the getting serious part and committing to it because if it wasnt then he gets comfortable with it and wont need to change because at that point of the relationship everything should be out in the open of who you two really are. If he has habits you dont like guess what he likes them so you are at a disadvantage otherwise he would change it, even though some would be hard to change such as smoking. If you cant see yourself with him forever, why waste his and yours time, dealing with something you dont like just causes stress in the long run, and dont try to change him, that is entirely up to him if he wants to be that way or not.
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if you dont feel comfortable with him maybe you shouldnt be dating him
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