Well if you dont get rid of him, invest in a dildo and make a porn video for him.

I would insist on going to a sex counselor, if he is not willing to do this, chances are, he is not willing to give this up for you.

It sounds like your "relationship" with him has some problems. He may have a pornography addiction, which has become VERY common over the past few years. In order to break the addiction however, the person almost always needs professional help. If he is willing, I would ask him to go with you to see a counselor. If he denies any problem and will not get any input on it from a professional, then go see someone yourself who can give you some guidance about what your options are, and what you might do to help your relationship if that is what you are wanting at this point. After four years you have invested alot, and it would be too bad to let things continue as they are. If your boyfriend will not admit to a problem and go with you, you could use some help in dealing with things yourself, so go alone. It will help you even if it does not help him. Hang in there. It could be much worse!

Maybe he needs medical or psychological therapy.

What's missing? If you where both happy in the begining and started to drift apart then you might focus on the barriers as something that your both experiencing and try to repair those issues.

thank you to all of you who have given me advice about counseling. He won't go. I am leaving him. He is terribly upset, and a really good guy. Maybe this will make him seek help. ??

Ive dealt with the EXACT same thing. He won't change unless he is willing to give up the porn and masturbation...If he won't give it up, then you have to be strong and leave him. I was with my ex for over 2 years...he wouldnt stop watching porn and jerking off because he was selfish..he didn't care about what I wanted but only about what felt good for him..Thats not the type of person you want to end up married to one day.

find some1 new and quit waisting each others time. you're obviously interrupting his porn and his porn is interfering with your sex. obviously not compatible but i'm sure you knew that once you saw what you wrote... you did didn't you!?

My bf does the exact same thing. I recently installed a spy program on the computer that logs everything he looks at in the day (he does this while I'm at work). Everynight I compile a list of the sites he visits(it's really sacry). Like any other addiction, the addict often doesnt realise or think they have a problem. I'm waiting till I have 2 months of logs to show him what he does all day and why he never bothers with me. I also compiled a folder with articles and research about pornography addiction, peoples horror stories and anything else of relavence. You can also try writing letter to him about how you feel, you don't have to give them to him, but it gets the pain out....I plan on giving them to my bf with everything else. I love my boyfriend to death and I think what I'm doing is harsh, but it might be the only way to make him realise he has a major problem. Good luck to you :) Take care...

this is the advise given to me by someone else on this forum... i also asked my boyfriend that question and he said he would have me his princess any day although he said that i pushed my feelings aside as we where still having the same fight over how much him looking at porn hurts me.. so i have given in and i am now in a well of my own saddness with out him doing little to try and help, as all he says is i have to understand it from him point of view... but all men look at porn but they dont lie to there girlfriends for 10months and continues to lie to his best mates.... so i think you have it easy as i hope your boyfriend never used to promise to never hurt u and then tell u all these things that he has lied about for so long straight to your face. I believe that all men need to learn to deal with this as there are many women out there who do not wish to be used in the way in which they feel they are subjected to when they are in a relationship with someone who looks at porn. I have a boyfriend of 2yrs who believes that he should not have sex before he is married and he looks at porn more then he looks at me. so the choice is yours but i bottle up how i feel cose i am so sick of fighting with him. so any help u can get u r lucky to get it as it is a forbidden topic in our relationship which normally ends up with me feeling like i am the bad person because i hate him looking at porn but he dont give a shit cose it satifies him.

I would say he is trying to get rid of you... Porn now has become his GF.... Try to work things out otherwise just leave... Go on with your life & meet another guy... SOMEONE who will hopefully want to get married to you...