My boyfriend that ive been dating for 5 months asked me to marry him. i dont know what to say. his mom likes me a lot & she called me last night & told me how much he loved me & i know he does & i love him too. but i dont know if im ready. how can i tell?
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baby jordan x3
ANSWERS: 29
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You can't really know if you're suitable for marriage after only 5 months. A year is a better time to be together first. Anyone (and I mean anyone) can be nice for a year. After that, it's much harder for them to hide their true colours. I know this from personal experience. Take your time, there's no hurry. :)
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You are ready when you can say "yes" without hesitation. I believe serious couples should AT LEAST go through all 4 seasons with one another before taking that step.
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5 months is not enough time to really get to know a person. If you both really care for each other, you would wait for the right time. It is a bad idea to get involve in a marriage that quick. That is the reason why soOo many people go through divorce. Take your time and get to realy know each other, don't rush, and most of all enjoy it while it is there. YOu will get what you want, and achieve so many things with just a little patient.
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look, to get married is not an easy thing, you have to be sure about you & him, can youl ive with him in the rest of ur life? do you really love him? can you be with him not only at the easy times/? what you feel about him is it really strong? will it last for ever?>do youwant him as the father of your children? ask ur slef all this & then you will get the answer that you are looking for. good luck i sidh you all the best
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if you're not sure, you're not ready honey never rush, make sure it's what you want first if it is, by all means congrats if not, relax
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This is all happening way too fast. Alarm bells should be ringing for you. Please take some advice and do not do anything and I mean anything until you have been dating for at least one year, or better still two. By then you will both know each other a lot better. Listen to your instincts. I think they are telling you no.
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Short answer: if you have to ask, you're not ready. BTW, I would question why his mom sees fit to intervene for him - I had a mother-in-law like that , she's now an ex-mother-in-law. It's great if she likes you and she might not be meddling, but I would be careful nonetheless.
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I can tell from your question that you are not ready. You will know when you are ready. Don't feel pressured. Also, your chances of having a successful marriage go up if you wait until you are around 25 and older so I would encourage you do try that.
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You are not ready for marriage when you have to ask if you are. You don't love him enough to get married if you have to wonder if your ready. When without a doubt or second thought you can say yes, then you are ready.
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I think the relationship should stay as it is for a while. you yourself questioned whether you wanted to get married and this shows that you are not yet ready... nobody can tell you, but when you are ready you will just know and it will be the greatest decision you ever made :)
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Your already unsure ,so you've really answered your own question........wait.
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its too early, if you dont know him very good. he may change on you for the worst. and guess what you are stuck with him. get to really know him first.
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If you love him and love his family then say yes but insist you want a long engagement 2+ years and just reassure him its because at 5 months people are still in the getting to know you phase....
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i was in the exact same situation last year. my boyfriend of 4 months asked me to marry him because i was moving out of state. i said yes, moved 1100 miles away, stayed in that relationship another year, then he went crazy. he called me 4 times a day, wouldn't let me go out with my girl friends, wouldn't let me have friends who were guys, and refused to let me sleep. he'd call me 3 times a night sometimes, just to make sure i was thinking of him. you cannot know everything about a guy in just a few months. wait it out, get to know the real him, then decide. that relationship ended horribly by the way. he's a meth addict now, and he was doing drugs when we were dating and he was lying to me about it. he even bought my ring with drug money. it's impossible to tell if you can truly be with someone for the rest of your life when the time frame is so short.
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When you're ready... or you could always ask for a long engagement.
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5 months is a little quick. Truthfully if you have doubts that you are ready then guess what? YOU'RE NOT!
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If you even hesitate for a moment, you aren't ready. Let him know how you feel about him and ask that he gives you more time. Not no, just not now.
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Speaking from experience... If you don't know if you are ready, you aren't ready. Hopefully he will be willing to wait until you are.
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The first year is infatuation. It is the icing on the cake. Once that is gone...if you can still love that person and want to be with them forever then it is ok to think about marriage. Until then it would be rediculous to marry. Or you could say yes and put the wedding off for a year or 2. But i dont recommend it.
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I think it all depends on how long you have known each other. If you just met, started dating, moved in together, and then wham! "Will you marry me?" I would suggest waiting...maybe accept the engagement but include that you want to establish a better relationship before you actually commit yourself to him for the rest of your life. Rushing into things is a known recipe for disaster nad heartbreak, proven on countless occasions not only in movies, but in real life as well. Now if you and your partner have been lifeling friends, that presents a different angle to which we should look at things. If you aren't ready, he should be willing to wait until you are, if he is not then he is clearly not the right one. An engagement does not actually represent marriage, it just represents a more solid committment.
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Going off of the limited information that you provided, I would say that 5 months is NOT enough time. More relevant questions I would ask myself: Have you lived together yet? How old are you? (If you're in your early twenties or younger and have not attended college or realized any goals yet, then getting married would be a mistake, IMO.) What's the rush?
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If you don't know if you're ready, I'd say you're not. I knew my wife 4 days before we got married and I told her I was going to marry her on the first night. our 11yr anniversary is next month.
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If you were ready you wouldn't be asking others how you'd know you were ready. You'll know its time when you don't have to ask. Don't let yourself be rushed into marriage. He can still have you and not be married... for now.
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If you don't know, then you're not yo...
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If your not sure if your ready, your not ready. I'd give it some more time. If your not living together, I HIGHLY suggest you do that before getting married as it is TOTALLY different when you are living together in your own place.
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I have a theory I apply to everything, from little things to buying shoes to big things like leaving my husband..... When in doubt...dont.
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That is good that he wants to commit. But being unsure yourself is a very bad sign. Tell him you love him too but you're not ready to be engaged yet. If he loves you like he says- he'll wait until you're sure. Believe me if you don't know then your not sure. I've been through the same thing. I dated a guy after 6 months he proposed and I was like "do I really want to or don't I??" I dumped him six months later and started dating a new guy- and as soon as I fell in love with this man I knew he was the one I want to spend the rest of my life with. When you know, you just know.
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You say you have been with him for 5 months but how long have you known him for- i got engaged to my partner after 3 months but knew him for 3 years before we got together it all depends if you can see yourself spendin the rest of your life with him hope this helps x
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I think you have to wait until the 'honey moon period' is over so to speak. (not the realy honey moon) but when you first get with some one you are completely infatuated with one another. That feeling does go away after you haev been together for years and sometimes that breaks people up.. but sometimes (such as my self) feel as if the honey moon period will never end. we have been together for a few years, haev lived together for nearly a year and still are completely madly in love, but can be serious and make our own decisions when need be. If you need to ask the question on if you are ready then you are not. Dam wish i would get asked far out. coz i am ready hahah
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