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  • First step: find out why. Maybe you just need to find the spark in your relationship, say if you both get makeovers. You'll both look like different people and that can be very attractive. Step Two: Talk to her, if it's her weight then tell her, if you're just being an ass, let her tell you. Don't just let it fester because that is the sure fire way to make a sad situation a messy divorce. I personally think that the key to keeping the spark in a relationship is to never stop dating, do romantic things for each other, spontaneously show her that you love her, and she should be doing the same. When you were dating she probably thought to dress up for you, and shave her legs and to keep an eye on her figure, don't let her stop! That is healthy attention to herself, many women when they become mothers just focus on the kids, make sure she gives herself attention. And maybe, she needs to think that she needs to fight to keep you before she'll do something about trying to keep you. women are strange creatures, the first time you tell her that there is a problem, she'll probably rationalize things to get her way. Show her in a BIG way that it's hurting not only you, but your family as well. Good luck!!
  • Thank you for your solid answer, Nicole. The thing is.. she has dramatically changed, and is losing weight now too.. and for the most part is being like she was when we originally started dating. I just don't know if I can get the spark back for myself, personally. We have discussed marriage counseling, and probably will do that.. but honestly.. I am just feeling like I am here out of guilt and for fear of hurting my daughter more than anything.. I Love my wife.. I am just not *IN LOVE* with her.. if that makes sense?
  • yeah, I do understand the difference, but if she's making the effort maybe you should too? If the man you are isn't in love with your wife, maybe you should remake yourself so that the new you can fall in love again. That personal health bit isn't just for women, it's men as well. How you feel health and beauty wise can be all the difference in how you feel about others. You love your family, then bring your family together, do things together. Take your wife and daughter to the zoo or the beach, make family dates and spend time together. You can see those you love in a new light when you just see how they are growing together. I don't mean to be a pain, but at your daughter's age, you and your wife separating, will probably hurt her. My parents spent a year apart when my brother was her age, and he's been showing the effects all of his life and that was with years of therapy. So were I in your shoes, I would make every effort to make a happy home for her to grow up in. So even if you are not madly in love with your wife, respect her and try to make your family work. good luck
  • yeah, I do understand the difference, but if she's making the effort maybe you should too? If the man you are isn't in love with your wife, maybe you should remake yourself so that the new you can fall in love again. That personal health bit isn't just for women, it's men as well. How you feel health and beauty wise can be all the difference in how you feel about others. You love your family, then bring your family together, do things together. Take your wife and daughter to the zoo or the beach, make family dates and spend time together. You can see those you love in a new light when you just see how they are growing together. I don't mean to be a pain, but at your daughter's age, you and your wife separating, will probably hurt her. My parents spent a year apart when my brother was her age, and he's been showing the effects all of his life and that was with years of therapy. So were I in your shoes, I would make every effort to make a happy home for her to grow up in. So even if you are not madly in love with your wife, respect her and try to make your family work. good luck

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