How to discourage romantic interest from a 25 y.o. without being mean?
And its not just the age, he's got a girlfriend and I like her. I don't want to encourage him, but don't want to seem mean. And I'm definitely not into swinging. I don't have sex outside of marriage and I'm not attracted to women.
by 
ANSWERS: 6
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Plainly tell him that you are not interested also you could tell them you have a partner that you just see once in while also could say you are not in the dating scene there is loads of things you can tell them without hurting their feelings , sometimes we got be strict in order to solve things
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Linda Joy I'm not going to lie. But the other ideas are good ones. Thanks. -
DancesWithWolves You're welcome :)
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Tell him you're flattered by his interest but the age difference, the fact he has a girlfriend who you like & wouldn't want to hurt and other things going on in your life mean there is no chance of anything happening between you.
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Linda Joy
Flattered, that's a good one, too. I've tried the other stuff. I even considered not brushing my teeth and not bathing. Then I thought maybe I should eat beans cabbage and cauliflower and let the farts rip whenever he's around. But I think that may be taking it too far. -
Professor Yaffle
Ha-ha! Try to get rid of him by being gross, it could work... If letting him down gently isn't working be firm, use the tone of voice you used to use for telling off your kids (I call it mum-mode) & hope he doesn't have a thing for strict older women! -
Linda Joy
Yeah, give him my mom's mad look!
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If he has an interest in you while maintaining a girlfriend, he's headed down the road of infidelity and needs to have his senses slammed against the wall - hard. Telling him straight out is the best way. It's totally honest and at the same time, it's teaching him a life lesson that he shouldn't allow his hormones to jump fences that are too high.
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Linda Joy
I know, but he's just a kid! Still if being firm and consistent doesn't work I may have to get mean, like Charin said.
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First: as long as you don't say ANYthing he'll probably believe that he "still has a chance". To be not-mean, the best way is to "come clean" in a way that is not in any way critical of HIM. For example: "Look, I'm not interested in you romantically because my religious beliefs don't allow infidelity and besides: I love my husband." Of course, those SPECIFIC reasons might not suit the situation, but whatever TRUE reasons that are not about HIM, PERSONALLY should serve.
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Linda Joy
Oh I've said plenty! I think one of the problems is that I'm not with anyone, but I don't want to be. I'm so over all that mess. I've even asked him would he be doing that if his gf were here. I told him I respect her greatly. He's just not listening.
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RIP THE BANDAID OFF! Be honest and tell him straight. Trying to sugarcoat it leaves him hope. Make him see there is none.
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Army Veteran
Like the "band-aid" analogy. It gets right to the point. -
Linda Joy
You're right. I'll have to if he doesn't stop.
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Is your surname Robinson? You sexy thing you lol! Stop wearing those fishnet stockings, I told you about this. :D Yeah, just tell him you are not interested, failing that, break open the baked beans and scramble egg.
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Linda Joy
HAHAHAHA! No! And this was all him! But he did mind his manners the last time I saw him, so maybe he got the message. -
Creamcrackered
That's good :)
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