Cant seem to let go. Wheres the closure and do i even need it in this situation????
some background info: we were solid for 3 years. and we broke up November 2009. because he left to afganistan in January. he's a marine. we been off an on wen he came back July 2009 through now 2010. I don't really trust him given he probably cheated but he did lie. off stupid things. regardless after some time, we part ways we go back to eachother. but today it happened.
so jeff was texting me songs and quotes for 4 days after I ended our "thing" and last night I texted... "I can't do this anymore." jeff said "me neither." I texted back "I don't no what to do. both ways suck." and he said "maybe it's time" and we texted for a little. and I said how did u get over me. he was like "what makes u think I did and will?" but a couple texts later I had to end the conversation. I said "damn I hate goodbyes. but thank you for everything you've taught me. you'll always be in my heart. if ever you feel your alone just think of me. I'll always love you Jeff. take care of yourself. god bless." he didn't text back. it's just hearbreaking. I guess I'm just wondering why he's not giving me closure and why did he not text back. I wonder if he's hurting or not. this situation sucks. any help?
by 3 hours ago
ANSWERS: 2
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What you are looking for isn't closure. You want the usual can't let go excuses to keep giving you reason to maintain contact because you want to repeat the same old habits you two have done all the previous times you supposedly broke up. It's just a game so you can claim a break up but you know you'll get back together again. You don't need "closure" you need an ending that means what it says. 9 years of playing this game is toxically childish. Either get married or cease all contact forever and stop with the you'll always be jn my heart and think of me junk. Remove all contact info and block him from contact on all social media and move on with your life. THAT'S closure.
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You are in a situationship, while it fulfills something in you, you won't end it. Question is, if he finds someone he loves and you don't hear from him again, would you be OK, are you investing your emotions because when he ends it, it will hurt. Form other relationships where stability and trust can exist. Have you dropped your standards to justify a casual flirting fling, which temporarily makes you feel wanted, but where you ,may feel crappy afterwards, until he hits you up again? If so you need to build your self esteem. Choose someone who chooses you, and makes you feel special and wanted, who can actually be there for you.
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