• +5 Yes, I have found out that some people, not all, just don't grasp kindness and forgiveness. They look for a motive behind it other than the love of God. In searching and mistrusting they become more hateful and bitter until the cancer of hate eats them up and shortens their lifes. How sad
  • The possibility exists, yes, though many are "natural born nasties".
  • I think many it would cause to be kinder, but not all. There are still those who it would antagonize, because they want you to keep arguing with them or whatever.
  • Striving to be kind is a meritorious route to take, regardless of other people's reactions.
  • I kill them with kindness!
  • I think it is more likely that they will be positively influenced or maybe just feel guilty they aren't kinder at some level. If they don't feel anything like that at least you have kept your positive attitude and still have your peace, even if you couldn't get them to share it with you. It's their loss :-)
  • A little of both depending on the other person.
  • Depending on the person who is attacking you. Sometimes,good people attack other good people,and can become unreasonable. Sometimes after awile,that person comes back to realize that what they did was wrong,and may or may not apologize. Other times,there are truely bad people who do not care about others at all,and if you continue to butter them up,they will only continue to hurt you. Peace,my friend,and I hope that this answers your question*
  • I usually let them go way too far, but when I do come back at them look out.
  • I size people up on a case by case basis. Some people will not respond to kindness except to take it as weakness. Don't believe that? Go spend some time in jail or prisons. Kindness in those places can get you killed or at minimum used as a punk. Trust and kindness is a good thing, but it's not always the best option. Sometimes brute force violence is the only solution. Ask the Taliban even. ;)
  • Love your enemies-it will drive them crazy! old bumper sticker from 1970's
  • I just looked up my dictionary, and the word "incorrigible" is very much there!
  • I love doing that, when people insult me i always compliment them, its so funny!!!
  • I think the latter possibility is more likely, but either way, your adversary will feel guilty, even if it's on a subconscious level. You are right not to lower yourself to their level.
  • Most of the time, I think that it would influence them to be kinder but I have been really surprised that it hasn't happened more often, here. It happens in the real life world almost always, at least that is my experience right now. I've lost it here a few times - didn't insult but spoke my mind and then tried to reason to leave the door open for peace. Also, Rosie I've answered questions that I knew I should have stayed away from (but when I first joined AB, I didn't know), and later regretted it. But, yes I try to be kind and I'm not sure if it would antagonize them - I just hope for peace.
  • I like what the Bible says about that! When we respond to evil in the radically form of goodness, it is like pouring "burning coals" over the head of the perpetrator of evil. Sounds good to me!
  • It might do either. It did for Jesus Christ. If even Jesus Christ antagonized some people, how would I expect to be different? I can't control the reactions of other people, and I'm not going to try. All I can control is myself. Being kind or at least being calm is the right thing to do. If they choose to respond angrily, they are the ones who will have to answer for it on judgment day, not me.
  • Regardless, you are doing the right thing by not reacting, espeically if you truly feel the love behind the kindness. Be kind anyway. It was never about you and them anyway, its about you and God.
  • If you stay friendly when they attack you, you won't enforce their aggressive attitude. There is a physical law that says: Pressure is always causing counterpressure. So I stay friendly as long it makes any sense and only if I do not see any other solution I start with my reactions. It is nothing but a myth coming out from a stupid sterotype in many cowboy movies that a man has to take his honour into his hands. Those who attack me and those who insult me can never attack my honour because my honour can only be insulted by people who are on the same level as I am. People who insult and attack other people are not on my level and so I ignore them. And in addition I would say, if you start with these people you will never win. Being younger I was very quickly to bash them down and so I won for the first moment and then the police showed up and I was the loser.
  • listen buddy,if a mad dog is coming towards u and keeps barking and walking aside and if u do nothing and think that it is just a dog,i had better walk quicker. u ultimately forgiving him. then after passing him u might be seen that he is running towards u.and then what? he made a bite on ur leg. if u think that time the same thing and forgive him then u r a freak.... what u have 2 think is "IT'S JUST A MAD DOG,AND HE BIT ME BUT I M A HUMAN AND I DON'T NEED 2 BITE HIM.BUT I NEED SHOOT HIM. u got 2 learn them a lesson buddy.....SATAN IS ALWAYS SATAN.
  • I'm sure we tend to get into similar situations like one posed by you and its very difficult to keep calm at all times and not give it back. Reading Proverbs has helped me great deal to tackle such attackers. Bible also says, "Be as pure as a dove and as sly as a wolf". It says treat members appropriately. Letting others treat you bad is not respecting yourself.

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