Do I have the right to be mad? Would you be mad?
(question in answer)
by 
Mean Girls
ANSWERS: 11
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I just found out that my hubby first got my engagement ring years ago,& use the ring to proposed to his ex-girlfriend,but she said no.& he kept the ring the whole time he knew me,& also used it to proposed to me.Im a little upset that he kept & use the same ring? Should I be mad,would you be mad?
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Haha, that's awesome! No, that just show's that he's financially responsible.
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I would be upset. He could have traded the ring in on something different...just for you. Somthing that wasn't intended for someone else in the first place.
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I wouldn't be. Rings are expensive. He kept the ring but not the ex-girlfriend ;)
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No I would not be mad. It was the ring he chose for the person he intended to marry. You are that person. The ex girlfriend is just that EX.
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I wouldn't be mad, no. I seems like you've interpreted his past actions to mean that you came in second place. If I were you, I would be happy he married me and not his other GF. Not to minimize your pain and disappointment, but try to let it go if you can. What matters is the kind of husband he is now.
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no sicne she didnt marrie him the the ring was never used. its still new so dont let that little thing bother you.
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Well, it's in the past now, but I can understand how it might upset you. It sort of takes the 'specialness' away from it for you I could imagine. The ladies seem to be much more understanding about this than I am, based on your other responses, but I would never have presented my wife with a ring I had bought for another woman. If anything, I would have taken it to a jeweler to see what they might be able to do with it, like use the stones and gold to create, or add to, another ring. Regardless, it's done and he married you, not her. Perhaps you can use your new found knowledge to get nice anniversary ring. ;)
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I don't know if I would be mad, but it makes sense why you would be. Yes, like other people have said, he married you, not her. However, him offering it to her before and you finding out about it DOES take away from sentimental value. It may have lost its "special" touch all because of this, and it serves him right for that anyway because he wasn't honest to you about it from the start. Sure, it says he's financially responsible, but it doesn't say much for his character. That being said, he married YOU, not the wedding ring.
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How did you find out - did someone tell you because they knew you would be upset? It was years ago - not like she said "No" a couple of months back so he asked you instead! I can understand you being a little bit miffed but honestly - put it in pespective; you have the man, the wedding ring (which I assume you chose together) and for your first anniversary you can have him get you an eternity ring to go with them... ;0) You got a good deal - don't dwell on this and let it ruin a wonderful marriage!
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That's not right in my opinion (it takes the 'special planning & thoughts') away from the intention of something meant for only you. However maybe financially or for other unknown practical reasons he felt he should hold on to it in the hopes of meeting someone special like you! As long as he loves and cherishes you that is all that really really counts. There must be a good reason why he did it. Maybe someday he will replace it with a ring for just you in mind! Good Luck +5
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