ANSWERS: 41
  • I personally would not consider having a relationship with someone old enough to be my father. Whatever floats your boat.... Some things about which to be wary: 1. If you two were to grow old together, he'd die way before you. 2. Is it love or just lust? 3. Are your parents going to kick you out of the house if they find out? If so, what will you do if he dumps you? 4. Are you planning on attending college? Do not let him get in the way of a further education.
  • Just as long as you haven't had sex until you've turned 18, everything is okay. If you did, though, he can go to jail if he gets caught, or your parents press charges. This is because you are still legally a minor. What does your family think of this relationship? What does his family think? I personally have no problems with such a relationship, as I got married when I was 18 to someone 10 years older than me. I am almost 21 and we have a beautiful baby boy. If your hearts are completely in the relationship and you both trust each other, I say go for it. Just make sure that your boyfriend can't get into any problems with legal issues regarding your age. But if this is a relationship in which trust is an issue or you are worrying all the time, take some time to think if you really want to be in the relationship. GOOD LUCK.
  • Well, I guess it is o.k. How long have you been seeing each other? The gender gap may rear its head after awhile.
  • ----------------
  • Great lol
  • I think you will get a couple of years older and want different things out of life and your feelings for this person will change...
  • I think it can be a very beautiful thing. One thing though - him not having "force[d] [you] to have sex" doesn't qualify him for a medal. The bare minimum a guy can do is to not attempt rape! But, if you're happy, and he's happy, and you don't let this relationship get in the way of your existing goals, like going to college and perhaps getting a career, I think it's fine. Obviously if you live in a state where the age of consent is 18, he would be guilty of statutory rape if he was caught. I know in NY and NJ the age is 17 an 16, respectively. Several other states are a little under 18 too, but check, and just in case, for his safety, I wouldn't go talking about your sex life from when you were 17. Good luck, and just as you would with a guy your own age, don't let him control or manipulate you or hurt you. Guys your own age can do that too - maybe moreso.
  • That is quite an age difference, but if it makes you happy, I guess that's what matters the most. It's better than being in a relationship with a 20 something year old who treats you like crap.
  • Enjoy it each day your together. But unfortunately replationships like yous do come to an end.
  • Lol thats so lame ur dumb all you can hope for is that one day u will understand and come crawling back down to the good guys have fun dont get killed or pregnant or else u fuked
  • You are grounded. lol
  • personally, i don't see a problem. just know that there's a chance it may not last. i was once in a relationship almost exactly like yours. though it wasn't her that got the broken heart! ;) lol! oh well, live and learn. the generation gap was our big problem, i was heading one direction and she headed another after a while. about all i can say is good luck to y'all, hope it works out for the two of you ;)
  • It's the same thing as if you starting dating a newborn baby. I cant believe you like to do it with babies!
  • This is not good, not good at all. Do you parents know? The thing is, a 35 year old (male or female), normally looks upon a 17 year old as a child (which you were). Forget the legal status, an 18 year old to a 35 year old is still a kid. What do Mum and/or Dad think?
  • Well, you asked for our opinions, hope my bluntness doesn't offend but since we're all adults here, here goes... 1. Of course he treats you well. He's hittin' an 18 YO. Are you kidding me? 2. Didn't force you to have sex...hmm. The hormones of a teenager need no coaxing...they're just dyin' to get busy. 3. While I will not deny that what you're feeling is love...hell, I was a teenage girl once too, for your own safety (of your heart) just be in the moment. Don't start talkin' about moving in, gettin' married and having children. Once in a blue moon, relationships such as yours do make it. The statistics are not stacked in your favor though. Plus, you REALLY have to think about this: Forgetting the age difference for a moment, do you really want to be tied down to someone when you are still so young? You have something right now that, once it's gone, it's gone forever and that is your youth. These next 10 years are your "Me" years. They should be used to find yourself, not get lost in another. They should be used to live it up...party your little heart out, travel, go to college - find out who YOU are. Oh, and please do not tell me you already know because if you did, you wouldn't be here asking us... Good luck, Anon...I really hope you take to heart at least a little of what I said because it is the same advice I’d give my own daughters...
  • he has secrets. what are they?
  • It may be a perfectly decent relationship. But a 35-year old who is interested in a child less than half his age sounds creepy to me.
  • He is taking advantage of you.
  • Sounds pretty creepy to me also. A thirty-five year old man dating a 17, almost 18 yr. old girl is not very appropiate. This is just my opinion, that is what your asking for. My concern is this: He is 35, you could easily be his child, he is that much older than you. How much do you really know about him? Has he dated other girls your age, if so, how/why did those relationships end? Did they end because the girls got too old? I am NOT saying he is a pedophile, but all too often men that date VERY young girls are doing so because of the urge to be with a child. I would consider being very careful in this relationship. How is he with very young children? Ask yourself this...If you were to have a daughter and she was the age you are now, would you approve of her dating a man over half her age? Remember, this is only my opinion. Ultimately you will have to make your own decisions. Good luck :)
  • i would be disturbed that he couldn't find a woman around his own age..
  • Odd that you two would have anything in common...you're at completely different places in your lives. Not forcing you to have sex is not an issue; the fact that he didn't rape you doesn't mean he's a catch. when you get a bit older, you'll probably realize he is much more worldly/jaded than you are and it might cause friction in the relationship.
  • he's old enough to be your dad.
  • Weird. Guys that want a girl that much younger are usually psychos, or socially impaired.
  • Congratulate him for me!
  • You shouldn't have been having sex with him. You are a minor. You could land him in a lot of trouble.
  • Just don't get pregnant!
  • listen only to yourself, not others
  • A very bad idea. You can ruin that man's life.
  • Holy Crap Where I come from that is a really bad thing. I would bet your being used and dont see it because guy can play girls expecially when he has 18 more years practice than you :S
  • Well I only think your relationship is a bad idea because he could go to jail for being with you. So maybe you two should stop dating until your birthday, and he'll understand if he truly loves you. I don't want to be rude but I think it to be a little creepy for him to be with you. I mean he could at least wait until it was legal for you two to be together. And he has to know the that its illegal for you two to be together.. I mean really.
  • He's 35. Obviously there's a good reason why he's not already married and has a family...He must have some serious flaws if he is dating 18 yr olds...
  • My opinion is that you are hooked up with a predatory individual.
  • By the time you reach 35 years of age, 17 year olds might as well be 10. You are so young! Someone in mid-adulthood should see you as a child, or at the very least as someone to mentor, but never as equals. And if it isn't an equal relationship, it isn't a healthy one. It's about power.
  • Obviously, you don't see a problem with this or you wouldn't be doing it and since you are so young I wouldn't expect you to make mature decisions. But this guy knows better. It is his responsibility not to have a relationship with a minor. Something's obviously wrong that he isn't attracted to more mature women...or that they aren't attracted to him. Of course, most women don't find pedophiles attractive.
  • you should be disgusted with yourself he IS wayyy too old -- old enough to be your dad relationships are made on consistency and compatibility ... what compatibility exists here? can he relate/enjoy the past-times of today's youth (like myspace and facebook, etc.)? can he talk to you about Iran-Iraq war that happened in 1987 (when he was 15 .. and you weren't even conceived)? think about it .. if you were with a guy your age, he would be able to talk about the same things that were revolving around your age .. that's why people go out with other people their own age -- because when you're closer in age, you understand each other better. as far as i'm concerned .. this is just gross and plain unbelievable ... if you're really turning 18 and consider yourself to be an "adult", then behave like one. get an education, concentrate on finding a job and career that can support you through your whole life and THEN think about relationships, preferably with someone your own age (who understands you and your life and who cares for you and treats you right) ... just my thought of course. i just hope you're not the girl i see on the 6 o'clock news who got raped by her boyfriend. happy new year ..
  • you need a slap of reality and needs prison !
  • Man you know this is sad. Everyone saying follow your heart shut the hell up because your brain isn't working right. My opinion is simple and to the point there is no dam way if you were my daughter would this guy even know you if you were underage wouldn't know you if you were 18!
  • Now, that is somewhat old. However no one has the right to stop you if that is what you really want. For your relationship, I am neither for it nor against it. You should be able to choose who to be with yet I don't see that working out in the long term. He is twice your age.
  • i am in the same situation right now and i dont know what to do
  • hey im in the samesituation because am 18 and seeing a 32year old not as big as ur age gap but oh well andi dont no what to say to my mum x but good luck to you
  • i have axactly the same question....he is olso very kind to me....well i don't think that age is a problem...do you??(well i have speand a lot of time thinking about it..)

Copyright 2018, Wired Ivy, LLC

Answerbag | Terms of Service | Privacy Policy