ANSWERS: 15
  • I find it hard to believe that what you and the 21 year old have is true love. My guess is that when the risk of the affair is gone, then so will the other relationship. Statistically anyway, that is typically the case.
  • I am less concerned about the age difference than the possibility the 21 year old has become the vehicle through which you have found a solution to an unsatisfying marriage. I would think some serious soul searching would be in order prior to commencing a costly, emotionally and financially devastating divorce action.
  • I'm with Skariff on this one. Being a woman attracted to older men, I'm worried that you may be using this girl to make yourself feel better about your current situation. If that is the case, it is unfair to her AND to your wife to continue the affair. If you're legitimately unhappy, by all means leave your wife if that is your only course of action. But my advice would be to spend some time alone afterward, to do some soul-searching. Jumping out of one bed into another is NEVER a good course of action.
  • Words of advice that always rang true... The grass is NOT always greener on the other side. She could have all kinds of flaws you arent even aware of because you dont live together, I'm guessing? Living with someone is a totally different ballgame and just know that there are trade-offs, its not always better elsewhere. You might end up wishing you'd kept what you had in the first place.
  • I agree with Lady Alathia and Skariff that you should seriously question your own motivations. The 21 year old woman aside, you should leave a marriage when you are sure that it is irreconcilable. That said, there is nothing wrong with pursuing love in all it's forms. It is clear that this new love is the primary motivating factor in you actually pursuing a divorce. I caution you that these kinds of cross generational relationships have a way of disintegrating. The woman may find in time that she does not want to be with you anymore. If this is the case, will you regret having left your wife? If not, go for it. If so, you have some soul-searching to do.
  • Almost everybody will tell you you're crazy, stupid, a predator, or having a mid-life crisis. So I guess you have to decide who is going to run your life.
  • My opinion is kind of mean but I feel I have to say it. IF you leave your wife you will be giving up how many years of marriage? And this 21 year old may love you now but will soon she will get bored and when she leaves you will have nothing. Think about that. Is it really worth it for a rendezvous with a young attractive woman? I promise you it wont last. Once she realizes what she is giving up to be with you, her love (or maybe just lust) will fade and she will no longer be willing to sacrifice so much for you. I am not trying to be rude. It is just the way things are. Hope you get things straightened out ans make the right choices. Best of luck, ~April~
  • You should stop cheating on your wife and either end the marriage or work on healing it. You are not in love withthe 21 year old you are in lust and the dgo is filling great. you are cheating and you are low down for doing that. confess. do not be mad as I am just being honest.
  • OF COURSE you are attracted to a 21 year old. It's called a mid-life crisis... Grow the hell up but leave your wife anyway she deserves better. Just be sure to leave her everything in the divorce, she is the one who has earned it all.
  • You know what.. people sit and point fingers about the state of our world and you are probably one of them. Marriage is not supposed to be what entertains you for life much less be responsible for your total happiness. YOU are. Your wife is not responsible for your unhappiness. You are. Seek out new experiences.. new hobbies..seek out positive friends who honor their marriages and join a gym.. climb out of the rut all relationships go through by joining a class or doing something you find enjoyable to get away and have to yourself because YOU are unhappy and YOU need to fix it.. Do things that do not have anything to do with breaking your VOWS and denting your honor. Nvm too late. Here you are. For a man who is even weak like this I say yes, please, go get with that 21 year old woman. Please. Let your wife meet a stronger man who understands the words "til death do us part". Who is not too lazy to go out and actually WORK to build themselves and the relationship back up in a positive way. Let the 21 yr old make you feel good about yourself for a while.. the newness, freshness.. etc.. guess what? It will always happen.. no matter how young, fresh, banging or hot the person is.. after a while the real work starts of maintaining a relationship and you will bail. Good going Leave your wife. She deserves better
  • This is a love affair, not a future marriage. Trying to turn it into one will ruin everything, I guarantee. Not to be cruel here, but a 21-year old girl does not date a married 48 year old because she wants a future with him. Sure, believe her when she says she loves you. She loves you now, married, with no expectations. She enjoys the attention you lavish on her. You both enjoy the adventure and the danger. You turning your entire life upsidedown to be with her is going to change your relationship entirely, and she is very young, and you have oodles of baggage. Enjoy it while it lasts, and for what it is. Your unhappy marriage is an entirely different issue which should be addressed separately.
  • Okay firstly. The hell with Snooch. Seriously, Snooch, who are you to assume anything about this dude. How do you know what the cause of his unhappy marriage is? His wife could be a total cunt how the fuck do you know? Maybe his wife is cheating on him? That happens just as much as men cheat on woman maybe SHE needs to learn the meaning of the words " from death do us part" and maybe you need the learn the meaning of " think before you speak" please refrain yourself from further unintelligent asinine objections based on some sort of ill-favored desire to strike out against men and there evil death penis'. That being said, having no knowledge of your situation with your wife my suggestion would be do what makes you happy. As a student of psychology its been my repeated experience to observe this phenom, that all humans exhibit. To put it simply we always do what it is we want to do. If your thinking seriously enough about leaving your wife, odds are you've already subconsciously decided to do so. So do it, be done with it and don't worry about age differences, 2000 years ago it would have been the Norm for a 50 year old man to have a 20 year old wife, even 15. People's opinions change with society,its not like shes 13, shes 21 shes a grown woman. Fuck what other people think, if they think its immoral, tell them, Morality is only relevant to the society in which it exists. Or in short, it means NOTHING, you find me the authority of morality ill give you a million bucks. DONE!
  • Take a chance on love - mister - you are how old - give me a break.
  • are you in love or in lust? You are 48. When this 21 year old is 48, how old will you be? By all means, leave your wife if you are that unhappy, but leave her because you are unhappy - not to get involved with someone else.
  • Welcome to the Philippines. Your situation sounds very typical of the foreigners who live here in this country.

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