• First of all divorce is the worst kind of warfare ever invented by humans - it is mean, bloody, dangerous and even deadly at times. It can turn perfectly decent human beings into raging madmen. Secondly, get an attorney - most consult for free, others will charge as you can pay, or will make their expenses part of the terms of the divorce where the other pays for it. I take it you are on a military base, either the base command office will be able to help you find an attorney, or at the very least tell you where and what the military stands on these issues, or the base chaplain will be able to point you in the right direction. As for making it work to 'save the marriage' unfortunately when the Big D is thrown out there somebody has reached the conclusion there is nothing left to do except part company. But you can try. The chaplain is a good place to start to get some sort of bearings on where to go for couples counseling. CC is the ONLY way to fix the relationship at this stage of the game. When things reach Divorce Status its way too easy for fights to break out - you all need a neutral place and an unbiased third person who will act like a referee and have the training to guide the warfare in a positive, helpful direction. Problem is that usually one person in the relationship is open and honest and even able to make this sort of commitment, but the other has already 'made up their mind' and the CC is a big waste of time, energy and money because having made up their mind they set about to make CC fail.

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