ANSWERS: 100
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You can look at it as he is watching it to be better and more ingenious in bed with you.
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Try finding some of your own, and see why he enjoys it so much.
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I don't think you can. If it bothers you now, it will probably always bother you. Whether you are consciously thinking of it or not, it will creep in and cause problems when other differences come up. Often you hear people say that when you are fighting over squeezing the toothpaste tube in the middle, there's really something else going on. I don't think you should have to "get over it" either. If you find it offensive, that's perfectly normal for many woman.
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Watch it with him. You can't be jealous if he's sharing what he likes with you, right? Besides, it can be fun - worst case scenario, you both get a good laugh at the terrible sound effects and music.
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He is the one that has got to “mentally” get over it. If it offends you, tell him about it. If he does nothing, dump him. Some guys like the fantasy stuff and others just like the real deal.
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I don't think you can either. My husband will go in the bathroom and "read" those awful magazines then come out and grope me. He does not understand why I get to upset after that. I have tried to tell him I feel like he needs the magazine to get turned on then finishes with me. He says that is not the case and has cut down on it maybe just talk to him
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I like the suggestions of watching with him, if he must watch. But if it really bothers you that much it'll have to become a 'porn or me' scenario though I wouldn't put it that way. Keep in mind that if you do insist he stop he might just take extra steps to make sure you don't find out about it. The most important thing IMHO is to keep in mind that it's not a reflection on you, how happy he is with you, or how satisfied he is sexually. Porn is enticing and addictive and many guys will go back to it no matter what.
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I DONT THINK U CAN GET OVER IT BUT I HAVE A GUY WHO I THINK OWNS STOCK IN THE PORNO WORLD,I USE TO GET REAL MAD AND IT BOTHERED ME ALOT BUT NOW I JUST SAY FORGET IT HE WILL WATCH IT BEFORE I GET HOME HE HAS TONS AND TONS OF PORN HE ACTUALLY GOES INTO THE STORE TO BUY THIS STUFF HOW I DONT KNOW I HAVW WATCHED IN THE PAST WITH HIM BUT I DONT ENJOY IT I WILL WATCH IT FOR HIM BUT NOT ON MY OWN SO I DONT THINK U CAN GET OVER IT BUT U CAN FIND AWAY TO FORGIVE HIM FOR WHAT HE DOES ASK HIM WHY HE ENJOYS PORN SO MUCH MAY BE IT JUST HELPS HIM GET HIS NUT OFF WE AS WOMAN CAN NOT BE AVAILABLE ALL THE TIME ASK ? THAT'S WHAT I DO AND HE HATES WHEN I CATCH HIM WATCHING HE GETS REAL EMBARESSED AND I LOVE IT THE SHAME I BRING TO HIS FACE WHEN HE KNOWS I KNOW
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If it really bothers you, I doubt if you will "get over it". Talk to him, if that doesn't help, try watching it with him. If it is still an issue with you it probably always will be, then you have to ask yourself if the relationship is worth it.
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Does it bother you when he watches football (or whatever else he watches that you don't). The problem is that you are taking his attraction to porn as a signal that he is missing something from you. Is your sex life good? If so, forget about the porn. It's just another thing guys like that women don't get (generally speaking, of course there are plenty of exceptions). It's not a statement about you. You're lucky he feels comfortable enough with you to let you know about it instead of sneaking it behind your back. Maybe he's hoping you'll join him? If your sex life isn't good, maybe you need to sit down with him and talk about it (maybe with the porn as a visual aid to kick off discussion). But most likely it just another of those guy things from Mars that woman find so digusting.
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I was in the same situation you were. I tried to get over it, I tried to join him, I bought Playgirl magazine and nothing worked. Eventually things didn't work out anyways BUT I discovered that there are plenty of men who aren't into porn. You'll be much happier if you find one of these guys.
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Get over it. Would you rather have him cheat on you?
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men watch porn its normal i would be more worried if he dident like it if it botheres u so much watch it with him its not that bad and might strengthen your relationship it did for me.
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Physically find another one.
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Why did you get mad? You should watch it with him.
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I think you need to decide, honestly, each of the following Why does it bother you? Why was he watching it? (just cos or something lacking) Does it really matter?
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I have caught my boyfriend numerous times. At first he always denies it, then he will fess up , i have a hard time believing alot of things he tells me, and my own self esteem and confidence is really bad now, espeacially when i used to have alot fo friends and was really happy, but now i dont even enjoy sex with him bcuz i feel like im the only woman he should be looking at, we have been together for 4 years and i havent gotten over the first time yet, but he also has had socalled friend and the interent he talks to and puts up an away message when i was around and he also talked to one girl i know on the3 phone.
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I don't think your boyfriend watching porn is so bad. My ex used to watch it and it improved our sex life so it was a good think in the end just the relationship wasnt that great
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Men like to watch whores. Some of them don't. But it doesn't have to mean anything. That's all they usually do. if it's not-you don't need them anyway. My boyfriend watches porns sometimes, it's not I like that but I know he's faced with the similar problem-many men are atracted to me in the street, at the club etc. So what? Who cares about all this stuff? We are what matters. No space for jealousy!!!
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try not to think of it in a bad light..he doesnt compare u to these women..he doesnt want you to do what they do..its a different world.. maybe u could try to watch it with him and turn it into a positive thing for you both?
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Have you ever tried watching it with him? You might like it...join in, it could bring a whole new perspective to your sex life.
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I have a boyfriend, who wants sex everyday..and sometimes i'm too tired from work then he'll go downstairs and watch porn. But then i find out he's watching it everyday even when we do have sex. Its offensive to me because i feel like Im not attractive enough 4 him. or i dont please him right. Ive been upset and cried over it, but he's addicted it seems. He says its because i dont give it to him whenever he asks. COuld that be the case?
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Watch some by yourself or with him.
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Watch it with him.
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First of all take charge don.t cowel. Is it your apartment or are you together? You have to realize that men think they can do anything they want to us if they bring in the bucks. If you don.t like it have it out, give him an ultimatim. Put your foot down. Ask yourself if he needs this what are you? You deserve better it is an insult to you and all woman kind. Go to the website Don't date him girl for more help. Stick up for yourself! ~Sister Rock
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I consider watching porn as emotional infidelity! He is lusting for the girl he's watching and it is still considered cheating. He should only be excited about you and should only need you alone to satisfy him. If thats not the case, you guys need to talk. Porn is an addiction that is damaging to relationships. Basically, if it bothers you.... talk to him or get out.
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Hahaha. Hard to believe this is in the "cheating" category. Apparently your having a pretty hard time with this. You need to have a serious conversation with him about your future and what is acceptable to you both. If you can't come to a fair agreement it would be better to end the relationship. Otherwise neither of you will be happy.
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Because porn is so available today, it can seem like its easy to become some kind of addict. But a young guy is biologically programmed to breed, and it's not an exaggeration to say that sex is the thing on a guys mind more than anything else. You can't hold your boyfriend's thoughts against him, but you can be upset when he acts on them- any decent guy can keep his feelings in check to a certain extent. There is a chance that you aren't quite fulfilling his sexual needs- so just keep that all in mind before you do anything drastic- if you cut off your boyfriend's porn then he will likely expect to see you naked twice as much.
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I'm in the same boat. I had a very wholesome rated pg childhood and now as an adult find porn and raunchy movies very offensive. I love my husband and we have a family together. Can't exactly leave over it now. I used to get screaming mad every time I caught him. Now I just keep it inside because he's not going to change even though he knows it bothers me . Men are visual creatures and unfortunately half nude woman are everywhere nowadays and only a click away in most cases. I've admitted defeat and only hope he hides it better. I'm considering going to counseling so I can work on myself so it won't completly kill me everytime.
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I had this issue with my boyfriend. He knew how much it hurt me and when he did it again I left him and took my child with me. I dont do threats I do action and it worked. He does not so much as glance at it now and I know for sure as i'm a PC techie and can easily find out. Sometimes men need a reminder that even though they may think it is trivial or "you will get over it" that your feelings count too. Make him understand how much it hurts, walk out. If he loves you more than porn he will come for you, if not your better without him.
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Dump him! If he rather watch porn then you he's telling you something. Nothing better then the real deal.
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Make him feel the same as you do. watch some porn for women, masterbate instead of having sex with him. Try it they don't like it.
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Just watch porn yourself, pick out things that arouse you and put them into your sexual life. Porn can be a good enhancement if used in the correct way. You just have to remember that those girls are not real.
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Understand that its better to watch porn than to cheat on you.
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Maybe you should be thankful that he is only watching porn and not out really cheating on you. Watching is not cheating. If you are uncomfortable with it, it's your problem not his. Maybe he is watching certain sexual acts that he knows that you won't do or are uncomfortable with. It is not hurting your relationship and may be helping it. Men always look at other women unless they prefer the same sex. They can't help it. It's second nature to them. I would much prefer that my husband stay at home and watch a porn movie than go out looking at real women. You can't tell me that you've never looked at another man or fantasized even if it was just an actor in a movie or on TV
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I think it's ridiculous that people are saying "It's just something guys do" And comparing it to football! For godsakes How would you feel if I looked at naked guys constantly that were far better looking then you and then decided I needed to have sex with you because I was turned on by the guys pictures? Stop making damn excuses. Stop acting like you can't change and stop acting like women should take this crap. If you care about a girl and this is hurting her you should attempt to change for her not tell her meh this is who I am.
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Ask yourself why is he watching it, from the way you have worded your question it seems that you may be a bit sexually repressed.
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Stop being jealous of the TV, and figure out a way to spice up your relationship, who knows maybe if you do he'll put the porn away.
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Guys will never admit that they are selfish when comes to enjoyment- They'll try to tell you that You have a problem not them so that they do not need to change- that's the oldest trick in the world- SO do what is only fair to yourself- either go get a better man with better morals or sink as low as them? in the name of love people cheat themselves out of true happiness and freedom.
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Do you understand why it bothers you? Do you feel threatened and unable to compete with the bimbettes on the screen, or does he use it as a crutch and an escape mechanism to avoid dealing with real world relationships? There are a lot of variables here, and couples counseling might help you figure out which ones apply to you both.
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It's cheating, every bit as much as having monica service Bikk (whatever the lawyers "proved"). There is no reason you should get over it any more than coming home to find another wonam in your bed
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I don't think a gal can watch porn every single time his man does. It gets tedious. I think you two will have to talk it out.
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Make peace with the fact that you can't change what he has already done, and then go from there and get to the bottom of why he is watching it, and why you are bothered by it.
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Watch it with him. You might get some ideas.
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Prayer will be the solutiuon, ask him to pray with you. I might look weird in this confused community, but I mean it. pray together for 10 min before such things happened in the day. if you started watching with him , u will find your self deep inside it and there is almost no way out. Now at least u can help him get out of that crap. but if both of are capsized, that will be the end of the game. Again I mean it pray together for 10 min. Due respect.
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Guys like porn. It's not you. Get over it.
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Some men watch it; others dont. First how long has he been watching it?? Is it something that he is willing to give up? Is is worth giving him up if he wont give "it" up? Porn is nothing that lowers your self worth... "Those" women are not the ones who he holds onto... You are.
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You're not married.. cheat. Find someone who wants to watch you ;)
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youre a dying breed many women watch porn thiese days.go and watch some male strippers with your girlfriends and make sure he finds out
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I am in the same exact situation. I tried telling him how it made me feel when he would look at it. It made me feel unattractive and that he was bored with me and that is why he was looking at porn and nudee pics of other girls. I tried telling him that it hurt me a lot that he had to do that but he just didn't care. He always hid it from me and lied to my face about it even when I found out the truth that he was looking at it so there went my trust in him. That was after I had told him that I don't care as long as we can watch it together and that he is honest with me....but he still lied. I broke up with him last night over this whole thing and gave him a choice...porn or me. At first he chose porn and after he found out about me not being that upset over me breaking up with him...he chose me. Said that he is going to try and stop looking at it and if he does or is..he will look at it with me. I still do not believe a word he says..That is men for you though..I will see how it goes over the next couple of weeks and if he is still lying..out the door he goes. I need to be happy and I can't keep putting up with this crap and the lying and his attitude. There are so many men out there that don't need porn. There are men that when they are with you..you are enough for them and they are happy with you so they don't need it. Maybe I am just not enough?? Even though he says I am. Holy crap that was long...
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Join him!!!
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I don't like it as well. I'm luckey i got a bf that don't watch it, Try and tell him how you feelabout it. I get it though it make you feel like your not enough and he has to look at after woman beacuse your not as good looking or whatever. And I could never watch it myself
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i don't get the pron thing anyway because its absurd and they're not touching you, the atmosphere is ridiculous and other men's schlongs dont do anything for me either. I would much rather have my gf and not care about anything else. I would approach him, ask him what it is that he wants from it. If you are serious with him, and I mean trust him with your life serious, I would give him a picture or yourself for when you're not there. Either way, you need to see what he gets out of it and try to replace it for him, get him out of the habbit by giving him you. I hope for his sake he realises what he does and does not need, because pron will not make him feel loved or stop him feeling lonely.
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In 1970, President Nixon commissioned an investigation into the harmful effects of pornography. When the study showed that pornography was harmless, the results were repressed. Comparisons between cultures is open to criticism; but when the laws against pornography in Denmark were relaxed, there was a *decrease* in sex-related crime (or social problems; can't remember which). Pornography may be distasteful, but it's intrinsically harmless. There are, however, studies that show that exposure to images of violence leads to violence. Several people have responded that women as well as men view pornography these days. Couples sometimes watch pornographic movies together as a sort of foreplay. I can only speak from personal experience; but pornography is simply erotic fantasy material. The idea of actually having sex with some of the women I've seen is repellent, because I'm in a committed relationship with my wife. But, just as women engage in fantasies, so do men. My advice is, if you can't or won't join in, at least see it for what it is. It's no threat to you, unless there's some other problem there -- and in that case it's merely a symptom, and you should address the problem, not the symptom. Best of luck to you.
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You can try watching it with him, or make one with him. If you relax and get into it, you'll find it kind of fun.
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You don't, because it's never going to stop bothering you. You talk to him about it, if he doesn't respect your feelings, if you're not worth it for him to just stop watching some nonsense, then why bother with him? I know it's difficult, but unless you're prepared to commit to the relationship and just stand this annoying habit - then it's not going to work and there is no point pushing it further. Watching your boyfriend watching porn isn't a great feel for us girls, and why should they do it when they have us anyway?
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He's just being a boy, you're obsessing over nothing.
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If you watch it with him and act crazy ovet the guys and start comparing him to them and him on the losing side, he will stop watching porn because of his ego.
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who cares if he watches porn? porn is hot!! watch it with him, it's a fun way to boost your sex life. you will feel more connected when you share a dirty little passion.
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Tell him you only want him giving you that kind of attention. Make some videos and take some pics for him. Give him some options.
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For the most part it's pretty harmless. You can tell him that it bothers you and that you don't like it, but He may not stop what he's doing. I agree with sitting beside him to watch and then compare him with the other men. It bothers my boyfriend when I do that to him, and he thinks before he hurls comments my way. Watch some porn by yourself, and start pasting nude/ half nude pictures of some of those hot studs all over your side of the room. Treat it like a training video. Talk dirty to him and really start getting into that whole "pornstar" role with him. Get really carried away with it too. When he complains and says you've gone too far with it, then you can tell him you said his behavior was a problem a long time ago, and that you will only stop when he does. Turn it into a bargaining tool. He may not have any problem with any of it, he may like it and not want you to stop. I guess you can just try it and see.
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Watch it with him and maybe get some new ideas
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watch more porn than him. lol, masturbate all the time and when he wants sex, telling you prefer the guys on the porn,. lol
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watch with him..That's the easiest way
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Either you approach him and demand that he stops or live with it. Even though most think that it is okay it is still a form of cheating. Yes cheating. Thinking of someone other than your spose/girlfriend in a sexual manner is cheating. Confront and demand he stops if it bothers you that bad. If he respects you he will stop.
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at least he is only doing that and not cheating on you! watch it with him you may find you like it to. he's not harming anyone, maybe try and deal with your insecurities
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Do not let it bother you. Him watching eye candy is better than him cheating on you. Let him watch the stuff, it is not hurting you dear and it is not a put down to you. Guys like porn. He is not judging you by them. And he is honest with you about it. Be thankful for that as most guys hide it.
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It's not something to "get over"...you can take it like a world ending, cataclysmic, nuclear detonating event...or you could get over it and find out if there reeeeeally is that BIG a problem...talk with him don't get all fatalistic
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Stop being a drama queen? then you should be over it in no time
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LMAO! Are you kidding? Try enjoying it with him.
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stop stressing over it.. its porn.. watch it with him... give him a good time.. and show him that its not needed. or if you dont want to do that.. then just know that they are fake, and you are real. and that matters more
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offer him the fuck he is lokking for.
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Well, this may sound kooky to you, but you might tell him it's fine as long as you can watch too. It could desensitize you to porn...and shall we say, create opportunities for intimacy.
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Men will always watch porn it is something I think we will just have to deal with. I am 24, extremely good looking, do glamour and underwear modeling and have a naturally VERY curvy body which my boyfriend loves. He pesters me for sex all the time, so most people would think he would not need to look at porn but he does. We have had so many arguments over this but now I have come to accept that he will always view porn it is so easily assessable nowadays and no matter how good looking and perfect you are as his girlfriend it won’t make anything difference. It such a shame but it’s the reality that we have to live with! x
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get a new boyfriend.
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I don't really get why it'd bother you. Just don't think about it.
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whats the big deal? its just porn? it's not like he is having sex with another girl??? porn is just a way for him to empty his sacks quickly and every guy does it. I'm a girl and I watch porn too. I have a lot of hang ups and trust issues but I am so glad I dont suffer about the porn thing cause i dont know ONE guy that doesn't want to watch porn, sadly its a fact of life and I think you need to find a way to deal with it... or marry a religious man who believes watching porn is against his moral standards?
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If so, How will you mentally get over the fact that your BF is just one of millions of normal guys in the world? watching porns has nothing to do with betrayal.Instead it's just a normalphysiological need
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come to the conclusion that it has nothing to do with you personally. Some guys just enjoy watching it. Dont try to change him. He'll only resent you for it.
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Watch with him?
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Offer him the he is looking for it.
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It's just normal everyday male and female (yes female) behavior. If it still bothers you then is more of a low self esteem issue. He's not cheating on you he's just getting some alone time that's all. How do I know? www.Monsterette.com - Women's training camp.
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It seems like you don't want to. Don't force yourself to get over something that yoou don't want to get over. You don't like it, so tell him that. Be really serious and say that you can't handle that and he's got to stop.
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I don't like it either. When I ask my boyfriend for sex and he rolls his eyes then I find him 5 minutes later jerking off to porn that SUCKS! I hate it! If two people are comfortable with it that's fine. I don't mind watching it with him even, but if he needs some sexual release he can come to me versus getting off to some other chick. It might not be a physical betrayal but when I'm already having to ask for sex it really is. I can understand how you feel. Don't let people make you feel badly that you don't like it. Just because other people like something doesn't mean you have to. We all have our own feelings about things.
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Well, as a girl myself sometimes it does get me annoyed, my boyfriend sometimes tunes me out when he sees a hot chick, or when hes watching porn. But try thinking of it this way... he's with you, not with her. He loves you and not her. Guys love women, not whores :)
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I had a HUGE mental block about my guy watchihg porn because at the time I didn't think it was healthy behavior and I couldn't understand what attracted him to it. I have since changed my opinion and can see how porn can actually be healthy in a relationship, not that is always is though. I would recommend you check out the following article: http://www.scarleteen.com/article/boyfriend/looking_lusting_and_learning_a_straightforward_look_at_pornography And the following podcast: http://personallifemedia.com/podcasts/229-just-for-women/episodes/27398-decker-cunov-founder-authentic-world I dunno what your politics are, these sites may be a little liberal for you (I know they were for me at first). But, they do offer up some pretty solid reasons for why people may actually like to watch porn.
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Why do you have to get over it? Deal with it. For yourself and your boyfriend. Remember. Things that are cumpulsory like that. Are usually coming from something else. Like a man's need for control or addictive tendencies in general. THe best way to fight a demon... is to face it, call it by name and deal with it. Silence makes it worse.
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Get over the boyfriend fast ... or ... Take a pretended interest in the guys within the porn and ask him why these guys are so much bigger than he :) That should do it. Goodluck! Peace
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Guys watching porn is like women shopping. It's never going to fill a true void in your life, but occasionally it's nice to go look at what you can't afford.
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Leave the loser. He is not equipped evidently to handle reality.
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Obviously you care. If you didn't care, it wouldn't hurt. Very simple. Find someone who cares about not hurting you. All these people recommending you engage have turned off & tuned out from their core. You are still in touch & not numb to the crap that hurts. If you cut off your central nervous system you won't realize that the stove is burning your hand when you touch it. From Pschologies magazine: Susanna Abse is Director of The Tavistock Centre for Couple Relationships. She lives with her husband and two teenage children in north London. "In my experience as a counsellor, the point of betrayal is not about whether you have flirted with someone, met them secretly, kissed them or had full sex. The point at which the crucial betrayal takes place is a mental step. It’s the moment you choose to continue your pursuit of flirtation, even though you consciously recognise that this now constitutes a threat to your relationship. Of course, this is not to discount physicality totally. If you choose to have sex with another person then it’s clear that you’re aware this could shatter the trust and bond you have in your existing relationship. This is often why sex seems to be a common benchmark for many couples: a kiss may happen spontaneously. Sex generally takes thought and planning. In most normal long-term relationships, we indulge in fantasy, or erotic or romantic thoughts about others, and it would be cruel to condemn us all as adulterers simply because of this. But if you’re prepared to indulge in contact with the person you are fantasising about, you’re at the point where your relationship is no longer more essential to you than your own personal needs and wants."
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If he is dealing with the pern and not you maybe you need to make a change.....if he watches occasionally to get horney then you guys need to work it out so its not needed.
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just remember that all straight men like to see naked women whether its with porn or magazines. its normal even though it bothers us. everybody masterbates.
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You're kidding right? Why does it bother you so much? I would worry more about that inferiority complex than what my BF does in his spare time.
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Okay. Honestly its not a big deal because all guys do it. Just think of it as a really long relationship with a friend. you wouldnt dump your best friend because you got a new friend would you? no. Actually it is healthy for a man to watch/use porn. Honestly My fiance watches porn and I didnt wamt him doing so either until he asked me to watch it with him one day. So i did. Turns out that it helps relieve some pressure and helps them to be creative when it comes to you.
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I wish I knew.
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Don't get over it, dump him and find someone worth you. He is cheating on you. "But I say unto you, That whosoever looketh on a woman to lust after her hath committed adultery with her already in his heart." (Matthew 5:28)
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why so0 much issue of it , if he watching to0 much porn all day and all nite then its the matter of concern , other wise its just Some Pure fun . he ejoys it let him enjoy it until it becomes to0 ugly and addictive at that time tell him that u dnt like what he is doing :)
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I'm certain my ex BF looked at porn online. I really never gave it much thought. Maybe I'm weird. I think most guys and a whole lot of women do as well. I just don't care or feel threatened by it.
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+5 maybe you could join him so you both get to enjoy the after effects.
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