My sister died last night. Suicide we think. How should I feel? I just feel numb and can't seem to get a grip on the reality of the situation. She was only 49 and i just feel so sad. Can anyone identify with me?
by 
DA BEN DAN yanggui zi COAT
ANSWERS: 27
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oh man i am so sorry. thats awful. numbness is normal and of course it doesnt seem real....maybe in a bit you can try going to a counsellor. sorry again.
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I am so sorry for your loss. You should feel exactly as you feel. Every person's reaction to any kind of death is different. The reaction you have is the right one for you. Don't let anyone try to dissuade you from your feelings. It will take a long time to process. Be sure to take every opportunity for closure. My father committed suicide and had his body donated to science. They sent me his ashes in the mail. I drove them to his boyhood stomping grounds and scattered them on a small hill because he had not wanted any ceremony or funeral. This was excellent closure that really helped with recovering.
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I am so sorry to hear that. I had a husband that also committed suicide. I think it is the hardest kind of death to overcome for a family and friends left behind. Take it one day at a time. Remember it was her choice and it is not your fault. There was nothing you could do to prevent this. I really feel for you. I know how difficult it is. Always remember your sister in the good times you had together. Don't ever forget that. There will come a time when you get really mad at her for doing such a thing. Please don't get stuck there. It is part of the grieving process and you have to move on from there and keep her memory alive. I know how hard it is to do, but for her, for yourself you need to move on from that. Good luck and again, I am truly sorry that you have to go through this. I know what I am saying is not going to make things better but I really really wish I could. Take care! -April
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I'm very sorry to hear this happened. I've never known someone who commited suicide but I do want you to understand that you aren't at fault. We all make our own decisions in life. Come to grips with her loss and move forward with the memories of the good times you had together. She lives on through you and through those people she touched in her life.
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Sorry to hear it. Mourn and cry. The immediate sadness needs to work its way out before the reconciliation comes. Being numb is a way for the body and mind to protect itself, so try not to be numb. Be sad I can't identify exactly, but I've lost friends to suicide. It is not something you can ever comprehend. So don't try. Try to find out what led her to that choice, but you'll never understand why she made the choice. I'm sorry for your loss.
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I can't tell you how sorry I am to hear this. I can't give you any advice because its never happened to me, but stay strong and you'll pull throu. Good luck.
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I can identify with that. I knew many people who died very tragically. You feel very ackward, numb, very emotional at times and you don't know what to do. And the only analogy that I can offer is; Its like looking in a telescope or something that is out of focus, but the focus part will come back. It just takes time.Take it one day at a time. Hang in there.
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You have my sincere condolences for your loss. Numbness is a normal feeling; reality will follow and with it a thousand questions that may never be answered. Keep you family close, you all need each other right now. I'll keep you in my thoughts and prayers.
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I am so sorry to hear of your loss, words cannot express how truly terrible it feels when someone takes their own life. It is understandable to feel numb - it will sem for a little while like you are living in a parallel universe; going through the motions and doing what needs to be done. When someone is ill we have time to mentally prepare ourselves for their passing but accidents or suicides take us by surprise and the mind needs time to adjust to the reality. Don't worry that you aren't feeling the "right" things - there is no right way to grieve. You'll go through a whole myriad of emotions and sometimes will swing wildly between them. Just try to work towards remembering your sister with affection - don't be sad she's gone, be glad to have known her.
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I'm really sorry, DAN. I saw your question and just wanted to extend my sympathies. The shock and grief when you lose someone you love -- sure, I can identify with you there.
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@DA BEN DAN - I'm sorry for your loss. Thankfully, I've been spared such tragedies in my life, so I can only try to imagine the pain you must be feeling. May you find strength and solace during this difficult time.
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I am sorry for your loss. Yes, I can identify. My best friend Effie shot herself in the head in 1986. She left two daughters, parents, grandparents, siblings and friends who still mourn her. My heart goes out to you. It gets a little easier over time, but not that much. They leave behind people who dearly loved them who are stuck for the rest of their lives in "if only I had done this" or "if I only I were a better friend/daughter/parent/whatever. :(
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I send you my condolences and wishes for you and your family to be given the grace to deal with the loss. I lost my only daughter 2 days after she had her first child. I thought everything had gone fine with the delivery and was atop the world when the news came. I totally understand the feeling of disbelief.
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I am so very sorry to hear of your loss. My condolences to you and your family, my friend. I don't think it matters if someone has suffered from a long illness, or a tragic accident or a suicide...there's always going to be the feeling of numbness and inability to grasp the reality of the situation. Although my father was very ill for a long time and we expected it, it still left us feeling as numb as when I lost my grandmother in a car accident. The feelings are completely normal. Allow yourself to grieve. Take the time to heal.
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I am so, SO sorry to hear of this. I don't know you, but I sit here crying for you and her other loved ones who must deal with this and the search for answers that may never come. I have no answers for you, but just want you to know that my thoughts are with you. You have my most profound sympathies. Don't worry about how you "should" feel. Life doesn't prepare us for being broadsided in such a fashion. We often learn in the midst of the experience. And remember, it really is true that time will heal but, DAMN, it takes a while to get there. Be good to yourself and your loved ones, man. That's the important thing right now. Sorry for rambling. It's well-intended.
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Im so sorry to hear of your sad loss Da Ben Dan, i dont know what to say. I have never lost anyone through suicide, so i cant identify with that particular situation, but to lose a loved one is something i CAN identify with. Take time to mourn for her, she is at peace now. There is no right or wrong way to feel when something like this happens, everyone is different, so take your time. I am here if you need me for anything (((hugs)))
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Numb is the right reaction. Go with it. I'm sorry for your loss, and I can't identify with you, but I can tell you that your feelings are valid. I am very sorry, but I have to tell you that, anger is one of the stages you are about to experience. Have a sympathetic friend look up the "grieving stages", then be available to help you. Don't try to force any of those stages, do them at your own pace. Good luck getting through this, you have some hard times ahead, but you will get where you need to be.
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I don't know how you can feel any other way than you do. I can't say that I know how you feel, as I have not been in your shoes, but I do feel for you. I do not know if you would find comfort in the scriptures or not, but I always do. I sure do not wan't to offend you in your time of grief. http://www.watchtower.org/e/20011022/diagram_03.htm / http://www.watchtower.org/e/20000915/article_01.htm
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Oh my. I am so sorry DBD. I have lost a few people, so I can sympothise with you. You will be in my prayers. My condolences.
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I am so sorry for your loss. I know how it feels to lose family members and it hurts very much. My heart and prayers go out to you. She will be with you in your heart forever. Just take one day at a time. The only thing that helps to ease the pain is time...
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I am so sorry for your loss. I am glad you are reaching out . We all have to help one another. I hope this video will help you it did for me. Let me know if you receive it.
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I am sorry that such a tragedy has hit you and your family, so many things happen to us through life...so many situations that are hard to take, I would be lying if I were to say that I had never been down that road myself, it was my faith that stopped me, the pain will ease with time and you will be left with a rainbow of wonderful memories, now is the time to mourn and hurt and to cry..you are in my prayers xx
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I'm so sorry for your loss. It seems much harder when it's suicide. I've lost a few friends that way and I know it's hard to understand. It Takes time but you will get through it. Good luck to you and your family
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My 19 yr old son died by his own hand on April 24 of last year. And I stll cry for him every day, it took around a year to come out of the shock. I don't remember my daughters wedding in March of this year. I don't know what to say to you, just try to be kind to yourself. I am sorry.
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Well the first thing you need to know is that it is NOT your fault. If she killed herself. That was her way to go. If your dazed about it and just cant accept it that meants your probably in denial, or shock, or you might start becoming depressed. If i was you, I'd try to accept it as much as i can and grive for her. Talk to your other friends and family. Try to go on. Someone once told me, "Life is short. So live on and make the most of it".
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I'm soory to hear this i can totally identify with you my sister attempted suicide infront of me when it was just me and her in the house i was 13 at the time, i'm now 15, i felt the same way as you. I'm still a bit mentally damaged by it i think i have depression but i'd rather see it through if i can good luck xx
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I can. My sister also committed suicide. Feel free to e-mail me if you need someone to talk to.
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