ANSWERS: 18
  • Fred who????
  • Castrate him.
  • Well, I'd make sure I was dressed in drag... then I'd go up to him and try to give him a big 'ol smooch.
  • Ignore him. There really is no reasoning with people like that, and I think falling on deaf ears would annoy him far more than my trying to smack some sense into him. Actually, I think he WANTS to argue, and WANTS to come across as "marginalized" and "the victim", so why on earth would I give him the satisfaction?
  • "Fred you old SOB how the h*ll have you been?" "How's Wilma and the kids?"
  • Deny, deny, deny and/or swear on HIS bible that the brakes on my car failed. Really.
  • Hello, Who are you?
  • Probably nothing- upon encountering him and his dog-and-pony show I'd probably be consumed with so much fury that I spontaneously combust. So I suppose once I catch fire I *could* run and give him a big hug while screaming, "GUESS WHAT A$$HOLE I F*CK WOMEN". Yes, I'm evil. ~_^ Hi Andrew!
  • "Yo nigga, let's shoot the shit"
  • His church has 71 confirmed members, 60 of whom are related to him through blood or marriage or both? I'd tell him that incest trumps anything he is rageing against and walk away. The man is a half-wit.
  • *Begin Fantasy* I would start screaming "YOU SHANT GET ME LORD XENU!! YOU SHANT YOU SHANT!! I WILL THROW AN OSTRICH IN YOUR EYE AND KNOW YOU OUT ONLY TO LET IT LAY AND EGG IN YOUR STUMMEH!! IT SHALL THEN SPAWN FROM YOUR STUMMEH AND EAT YOUR FLESH!! THEN I SHALL DANCE AROUND HIS CORPSE AND NAME THE OSTRICH MR SHPOKINSHKEMELII!! HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA!!!! *End Fantasy* Actually... I wouldn't do anything but scream "God hates Westboro Baptist Doctrine!!"
  • With a KJV Bible in hand, smile, cock my head to the side and say "Jesus loves you" in such a sugary sweet tone it'd make me sick. If he bothered trying to correct me, I could tell him "Satan loves you" in the same way. I used to have people come up to me and say "Jesus loves you" when I was a teen. I used to wear spike collars, fishnets, etc. or would otherwise wear ankle-length velvet skirt and long velvet button-up shirt (which with long wavy red hair made me "look pagan" or Wiccan apparently). I was, at the time, in the youth leadership at a non-denominational Protestant church as well as helping out with campus Bible studies. I ended up founding an Occult Outreach because I knew what it was like to be on the other side and that most people who talk to you about Jesus are doing it for the wrong reason (trying to score Brownie Points with God because they're afraid they'll go to Hell, trying to add another tally to those they've saved, blindly doing what their pastors told them to do, etc.) and can be unknowledgeable about it. (I'd read The Satanic Bible and actually agreed with most of the criticisms of hypocrisy. The hypocrisy was part of why I ended up leaving that church.) I was friends with these people and would remain a friend whether they changed or not. I wasn't out to convert them, just to tell them of my experience. Now I wouldn't wish any of them to organized religion, at least at that particular church. Long story short: It's annoying and gets old FAST.
  • I'd like to take one of his picket signs and shove it down his throat :)
  • I'd prolly keep walking...never heard of him. wouldn't know/care if I ran in to him.
  • If I ran into Fred Phelps, I'd be driving. 'Nuff said.
  • I probably wouldn't know who he was. Even if I did, I'd probably ignore him. He does his radical stupidity for attention, and I'm not going to satisfy his craving. Plus, he isn't really worth my breath - or spit - anyway.
  • make some phone calls and torch his so called church while I kept him busy. show him who god really hates
  • I would ignore the dude. It is obvious that the man is possesed by demons.

Copyright 2018, Wired Ivy, LLC

Answerbag | Terms of Service | Privacy Policy