ANSWERS: 11
  • Your feelings are your own... they are neither wrong or right. I think you should just be there for her and let her know that no matter what you are her friend, you may not agree with her being pregnant or you may think her choice is wrong, but she is still your friend, her choices might be wrong to you, but the person is still good.
  • It's not bad, you can't help the way that you feel. At least you are honest about it. I am sure you have good reason to feel the way you do but don't beat yourself up about it. :-) xx
  • No, Not at all. Pregnancy changes life not only for the mother, but also for her friends and family. To be honest, I feel exactly the same. I have a friend who is pregnant, and although I feel bad for saying it, Im not really happy about it. I think its a bad move. She's only been seeing him a few months, they dont really know each other never mind love each other, he doesnt really want a baby (I think he will clear off quite soon actually), she was talking about ending the relationship before this happened because she knew that it wasnt right, and to top it all off, he is a chef and he works very long hours. Even on his days off he doesnt actually bother to take my friend anywhere. He spends all day in the pub when he is not working. The only think I (and I suppose you ) can do is just to accept that having a baby is an individual decision. Neither me nor you have to be responsible for the baby (midnight feeds etc)and we dont really have to live with the consequences of the decision. Just try to be a friend because she'll probably need you.
  • It's not bad to feel upset. You could be reacting to a situation she is in. Was the pregnancy unplanned? How does your friend feel about it? If it was planned and she is happy then try to be happy for her. But if it wasn't planned and you feel she's not ready or if she is upset about it, then that could cause you to be upset also. And that isn't a bad thing. It would just show that you care about your friend and your friendship with her.
  • Are you upset because she's pregnant and you don't feel that she's ready to have a baby? Or are you upset because of how you feel her having a baby is going to affect your friendship with her? Either way, I wouldn't say that it's "bad" to feel ANY way about anything - but be careful about how you express your feelings to your friend. She's probably feeling a whole mess of emotions herself right now, and she really needs your support.
  • I have PCOS and Endometriosis and know I may never have a child, so sometimes I get upset when someone on TV has a baby. Just the other night one of my master's psych. profs. passed out a handout on pregnancy risks as you get older, and I almost cried, and I am usually an emotional rock.
  • It depends why you are feeling upset. Are you upset because you are not preg and she is. If not are you upset because she is still young and a whole life ahead of her. so the feeling depends on you, and only you will know the answer to that.
  • No, it's not wrong. I feel the same way -I just found out my best friend is pregnant after being with a guy she meet this fall, moved across the country to move in with him, and 2 months later she got pregnant(unplanned). And it’s not b/c I can’t have children – I’m simply not ready for children, but she is 22 years old, and I personally feel she is moving too fast imo. ( If it were me I would have made different decisions; see the world, and further my education before having children, but I do realize this is my choice) I guess the real reason I am upset is because I know our friendship is going to change regardless if I want it to or not -it is something that naturally happens to friendships when only one person has a child; much less girls night out, partying, dancing at clubs until 4am, shopping, going out for coffee, etc. I know the way we feel towards each other will never change, & that I’ll always be there for her, and with her having a baby I can’t say she’ll always be there for me, and I completely understand that too. In many ways I feel that I will be losing my friend.
  • What kind of upset though?? Jealousy upset.. like you're jealous you're not pregnant OR jealous new baby will have all friends attention.. ??
  • It's okay and perfectly valid to be upset by this for any number of reasons. The important thing is how you react to this upset. There is no need to tell your pregnant friend that you are upset.
  • kind of, sounds like youre jealous

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