ANSWERS: 23
  • you could exchange body shots? or you could get talking about what build he is and then lead it on from there..or just talk to him about "beauty" (im not saying your not beautiful, but its the same sort of topic) is only skin deep, does he agree?
  • Send him a picture with more of you on it. If he judges you or can't look beyond that, then he's not worth your time, and the sooner you find out, the better. Besides, it's very likely to be that he won't have to look beyond it. Lots of men like girls to be curvy.
  • He will judge you more if you attempt to "lie". It is not nice to assume someone won't look beyond your weight. You never know, he could be "thick" too! Just tell him the truth. If he is bothered by it, he isn't the guy for you anyhow.
  • Tell him that you are "rubinesque" and have a large chest.
  • You can't control whether he will judge. You can control the way you present yourself- If you pick a full shot for him, don't pick one where you're in too-snug jeans and horizontal stripes, you know? There are certainly angles that are more flattering, as well. Not to be deceptive, of course, it's certainly a lie if you show your reflection in a funhouse mirror or whatever, but you can show yourself a healthy, having-fun person who happens to not look like a stick figure.
  • there's no looking past who you are. Everyone judges be it external or internal, it's a part of life. All you can do is be honest with yourself and him, let him know or next time you trade pics include on that is a full body pic. See how he reacts (don't grill him about it) but don't call attention to it, don't bring it up in conversation just slip it in there and see how he reacts. If he is not ok with it he will either say so or become distant, either way you will know he isn't the one. As a side note I just want to say that some people just don't prefer thick guys or girls, it's just a matter of taste and you shouldn't hold that against him. BUT he should not make that the only reason to end the relationship if he likes your face, personality, etc etc. Also you not allowing him to know this is kind of a lie of ommission of sorts, as I said before people have preferences, people judge, unfortunately the external is part of that evaluation we all make when we meet someone. But I think it's kind of unfair to pull someone in and not let them know all the facts about you or hide something until it is too late and then be upset if he changes his mind. It's kind of like if this continued between the 2 of you and then you started seeing one another and then he told you he was a post-op or a transgender or something..maybe it would bother you or maybe not but it's kind of unfair to omit this fact and then spring it on someone when they have fallen for you. I'm not saying obesity or being a little thick is exactly the same as a gender lie but it is similar in a sense that you are not laying all the info out there for him to make a fair decision.
  • errr,whos got the problem here,if youre so unhappy about the way you want others to see you, try looking beyond yourself & have greater faith in your own self esteem,if he doesn't like what he sees dont let it get you down after all no ones perfect & if youre expecting him to expect perfection,forget it cos it does not exist. be open, honest & above all beleive in yourself, the kindness, the trust will always follow,give him the chance & then youll know if it had been worthwhile otherwise without the honesty you could be wasting a good portion of your personal life, I would not tell him if i were you, just swap pics see what happens also you are not a thick girl,we are all different & im sure he aint no brain surgeon good luck sweet thing:)
  • If he is the sort to judge more on appearance than character, is her really the sort you want to be involved with? I am saddened by the number of girls on AB who have yet to find a man worthy of the affections they hold. I have read so many questions about these jerks girls are dating - "Should I take him back, the 3rd time he cheats on me?", etc... As if there are no decent men anymore... WE ARE OUT HERE! There are men who won't dump you because you're 16/18. There are men who love what lies within, rather than what the eyes see. There are men with a sense of honor, men who believe it their duty to protect and provide for and look out for those they love. We are out here. So, if this internet crush of yours is so superficial that 16/18 spells the end of your relationship, don't give up - he wasn't worthy of your love anyway. Hold out for a more deserving guy. But, if he is an honorable man... then I hope your love grows more each day.
  • First of all... I would like to say if someone does not like you for what you look like or what your size is... please don't bother.. That person is not worth your time and you can continue to find someone that cares about more important qualities that makes a successful relationship work! When you introduce yourself to someone you always want to show your true self and not what you want them to see you as.. because that will almost always lead to disappointment.. Be honest! You must be happy with who you are... before anyone else can.. People will always judge.. its just kinda natural.. but it is not always bad judgement so why not take the chance.. you are who you are.. I hope I helped! Good Luck! ;)
  • he is probably thicker than you. he is probably nothing like his picture. he probably uses a picture that was taken twenty years ago. its common for men to do that. he is probably faking it too. he is probably a slob that drinks beer and cant do his own laundry.
  • You should have been more up front with him. He may not even care but it's left you in the position where you feel you may have misled him. On a good note he may be a little "thick himself". Don't allow it to happen in the future. Just tell him straight out. He'll appreciate your honesty.
  • 16/18 isn't exactly mutant size! Its actually pretty normal... Try sending a nice waist-up shot and see what he says...
  • Have enough confidence in yourself to tell him without even thinking that he won't like you. Take some sexy shots of yourself (not nude of course, but some nice pics) and ask him what he thinks of your outfit or something... If he doesn't like it then its his loss!
  • Love yourself girlfriend and I'm sure he will too! Men are also attracted to women who have high self esteem and are not ashamed of their bodies.Think of MONIQUE,(the comedian)or TOCCARA JONES (from TOP MODEL),they shine from their personalities. I am a beautiful 25yr old plus size woman(size 16) and proud of it! So relax and embrace your curves and if he cant do the same then screw him. True beauty comes from within!
  • I'm sure you are worrying about nothing. He probably has insecurities of his own and is also nervous about how you will "judge" him. Just be yourself and don't worry about your size if you are happy with it. Here are the possible outcomes: 1). He stops liking you because of your size. (Then he's not a keeper...sorry, but be glad you know now and move on. There are some great guys out there and he is only a stumbling block on your path to happiness.) 2). He adores your curves and personality. (That's the guy who is worthy of your time.) Either way, YOU emerge a winner. Love yourself--you are beautiful! :D
  • How about the simple truth via an actual full-body pic? A man, when he first meets you, will not "look beyond" the fact that you are over-weight. For most men, physical appearance is essential to determine whether or not he will be attracted to and aroused by you. Men are visual and this sort of thing is hard-wired into us. He may end up liking the way you look, BUT it is important that you do not engage in false advertising. At the very least, he might well resent that you were withholding information and, worse case, he may also be turned-off by you. How would you feel if he had been claiming to be a successful business owner and, upon meeting him, you discover he is a pizza delivery guy?
  • I've been here honey - great phone conversation, then on to how I look. When letting people know how I look, I always tells the truth, and when they request pics, I send very recent pictures, both face shots and full body shots. The response I get is usually very positive. I say just tell him the truth, that way you are letting him decide if it is something he wants to continue. If not, DUECES!!!!!
  • just tell him. if he ditches you for being A 16/18 he is a loser anyway. thst only one size bigger than i and i dont think im big at all
  • If he is smart and worthy of your attentions in the first place, it wont matter to him. If he is a shallow jerk... Why do you care what he thinks anyway? Do you really want to begin cultivating something that you will kill yourself over? Find someone who loves you for who you are... If it ends up being him than great, if not... Oh well. Http://www.dovecampaignforrealbeauty.com
  • Make sure you let him know before you make any plans to meet in person. It's a cruel world sometimes, but it's better to know up front that it's not going to work before making plans that could possibly be very expensive for one or both of you.
  • Apparently this has not come up in conversation before in any way. If you are worried about what he will think/say/do, tell him that... You have to tell him something and you are worried about it. If you've had others you've met "run away", tell him that. Then tell him. Give him the name of a TV, Movie, or Music star you feel you look like, size-wise. If he's already smitten, he will want to meet you, no matter what. If not, and he still likes you, he's probably a "keeper". If he runs, he wasn't worth your "crush", was he? Besides, MOST head-shots contain shoulders... And most people who are ... "think", you called it ... can't hide their shoulders. If he's at all observant, he knows you aren't thin. ;-) And, besides again, not all guys care!
  • Oh, phew, when you said 'thick girl' for a moment I thought you were calling yourself stupid! You don't say whether you are in the US or the UK, but there are only 2 inches in the difference in size labels. Just go for it - tell him honestly that you are a curvy 18 and you don't like your size. See what he says. If he is as gorgeous as you hope, he will have fallen in love with your character and sense of fun and won't care tuppence what size you are. If you're really lucky he won't be a stick insect either and will actually prefer girls like you with a bit to cuddle. Of course if he's some shallow schmuck who is saving himself for Barbie, then you're better off getting shot of him now, aren't you? Good luck!
  • i like my girl to be thick. that just means that got more love to give. i dont know what size my wife is but she is thick and very sexy. here is some pics of my wife, me and my 4 yr old son and my 8 yr old daugher

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