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  • Yes you should have them, it really helps.
  • You never make love TO that person. You make love WITH that person. For the sake of the younger folks who read these answers, I won't get very graphic. I'm sure you can use your imagination. I AM A VERY fortunate man. I had the wonderful experience of seeing my parents, both sets of grandparents and all my aunts and uncles behave as though they were constantly on their honeymoons with their spouses. They would hold hands, cuddle, hug, kiss, whisper things to each other, say, "I love you, _____!" and carry-on like many young people, who are in love, do in public. They would smile at each other and tell each other how beautiful, wonderful and thoughtful she was and how thoughtful, wonderful and handsome he was! WOW! What a great set of romance role models! No, I never watched as they were making love in the most intimate way, but I DID see and learn from their examples and inter-actions with their spouses! As far as I know, no one ever cheated on the other. That being said, one day my mother's father got in the car with me. I was driving him to the track. He "LOVED those ponies"! He was well-aware of the relationship I had with the lady I was dating and who would one day be my bride. He said words similar to these: I know your father told you what to do, but did he ever tell you how to do it? I answered, "No". He went on to say, "I'm going to tell you some things I don't think you'll learn from any one else. When you have sex, make love or whatever you want to call it, you don't behave like most other men. Most men are just interested in one thing and one thing only - satisfying their own selfish selves. That's NOT the way to do it. You have to make absolutely certain she is satisfied. No matter how long it takes or what you have to do, you have to do whatever it takes to make sure she does what she likes to do best. You HAVE TO satisfy her first. Your brain is the most important sex organ. Your brain controls what happens downstairs. When you aren't sure about what to do or how to do it, ask her what she wants you to do. She'll tell you or she'll show you. When you're making love, you think of other things - not what's going on at that particular moment with that particular lady. When you think about what you're actually doing, I guarantee you'll never satisfy the lady in your life. He went on to explain about holding hands, hugging, kissing, caressing and taking things one step at a time. He described a lot of things I heard of but wasn't sure about. During that ride, one of the last things he said was: When you are absolutely sure she is satisfied, then you can do what you know is best for you - but not one minute before. That's what I was told. Thank you, Gran'pop. I love you. I miss you! Some afterthoughts: You could also buy a book, on-line, called "Kama Sutra." You could also go on-line and make the investment in some "adult sex toys" to stimulate and arouse. There are LOTS of sites. Thanks for asking your Q! I enjoyed answering it! VTY, Ron Berue Yes, that is my real last name! Sources: My wonderful family! "THE University of Hard Knocks" also known as ("a/k/a") "life's valuable lessons"
    • officegirl
      Good enough, good advice. Just in the real world such ideals seldom exist and if they do it is only for a while. I taught my husband what I want and things went very well for a few years but then he became lazier more of the time. I require a lot of time which he was not always willing to give. He found someone who takes less time he is more comfortable with and he sees her once or twice a week. While I go with someone who enjoys my needs more.. We ( my husband and I) love each other and get on and enjoy one another's company but sex is rare because of the different needs. I should have started him out more slowly and basically from what he was comfortable with rather than go for as much as I did as soon as I did with him. But I wanted things to go well so I gave him like a road map. Oh the thing about a man not thinking about what he is doing with us - I 've been with men who have used that but once they get used to not overstimulating themselves and taking it more easy mentally they can usually discard that because they have the right right feeling down and become comfortable with it. But good for your grandparents and good for you!

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