You only think you love him, you dont seem ready for a long term relationship.

Well, the short answer would seem to be that, much as you love your boyfriend (and I won't pass any judgment of whether you do or don't), you are still not very good at resisting temptation. You aren't the first and won't be the last to realize this about yourself. Physical attraction can be a very powerful thing and can make us forget that gratifying carnal impulses can have devastating effects on our close relationships. I do agree with the other member who said that you might not be ready for a committed relationship; there is nothing wrong with this as long as you recognize it and don't give false hope and promises of faithfulness that you know you are unable to fulfill.

i cheated on my fiance several times. i never really wanted to sleep with any of the men i did, sometimes there was no attraction at all. but i did it. i cannot explain why. but i stayed with him and kept it my secret. he found out and wants to just be friends, i feel like such a horrible person and i dont know if its cuz i got cought or because i hurt him? i wish i had all the answers. but now all i want is him. i threw away a good thing... . and im reeping what i sewed now.. :(

The same reason guys do. I mean why are people so terribly opinionated towards men, but when it's women doing the cheating they are ready to comfort them no offense anyone, but come on?! "you are still not very good at resisting temptation."-Grandma Roses says WGACA just one quote, so far, but wait a few more days. I bet you won't see something in here that says you are a dog. Have you ever thought of that? Let's comfort the cheating dog. I will sit back and wait for the negative points to roll in, but try being cheated on. You are hurtful, inconsiderate, thoughtless, selfish, among other things. But the people to comment on this will say that you weren't fulfilled in some way. I apologize for being so blunt.

1)you could have been under the influence of a mind altering substance (no excuse) 2) you need reassurance for self confidence (again no excuse) 3) you really dont love nor respect your boyfriend take your pick

serves you right

Ah, but somewhere in you... you have the answer to this question. I'm not trying to be patronizing... I truly believe that is helpful You just have to sort it all out now.

It is possible that you take your man for granted, and the connections you share are not as intimate as you want them to be, or you have encountered problems with him, bedroom or not, and you ventured on to potentially greener pastures.

You don't love him as much as you think you do... I doubt you even love him at all. I couldn't even THINK about cheating or doing anything that would cause my BF pain. If he hurts, I hurt even more. Don't ask US why, only you have the answer to that.

i think you cheat on him as some way of proving to yourself that you still want to be with him cuase if you didnt not feel as bad as you do now, then you didnt care for him so thinkin you done him worng means you still care for him..

Cheating is a symptom and not a disease. You are right to think "Why". Now follow through with it. I suggest you go two weeks without talking to or seeing your boyfriend. During that time, figure out what you miss about him. During that time, what made you feel incomplete? What made you sad? Most people who cheat still love their partners, but are missing something that makes them whole. Seek out what made you do this, but above all else, confess to him what you have done. See if the relationship survives this test first.

Because you were either drunk or feeling insecure and you have no self control!

There can be a variety of reasons. Only YOU can tell what those were. As someguy said, I would suggest you take some time off from him. If he doesn't know, just tell him you need to think some things through, and that you will talk to him when you're done. Hopefully it won't take TOO long - I'm sure you've already been trying to figure it out for yourself. If he does know, and has either forgiven you, or said he just wants to be friends, now, and you still have a lot of contact, tell him you are trying to figure out, for yourself, WHY you cheated, and you will tell him about it when you've figured it out. Ask him NOT to call you for a while, so you can think about it without interruption or guilt. If it takes more than a week, call him and just say, you're still working on it... You just wanted to keep in contact to let him know how much you love him. If it takes more time, keep in contact the same way each week. One way to work it out, is to write down questions that you feel you would have asked HIM, if HE had cheated. Don't think about YOUR answers to them, but what YOU would want to know. When that's done, answer them. Write down your answers. When you write, you have to have things straight in your own head. Again, since you've already been trying to figure it out, it might not take too long, but don't be surprised if it does. You may find that you didn't or don't love your boyfriend as much as you think you do. You may find that something was missing, and what that something is. You may find that you were trying to do something so HE would break up with YOU, so you wouldn't have to do it, no matter HOW much you love him. Take the time - but not TOO long. Figure it out, and make sure HE knows the reasons. It's only fair. Then it will be up to him whether he will take you back or not. If you love him so much, and he you, then it CAN be worked out. Don't be surprised if he then needs some time to work out what HE'S feeling. You may want to read my answer at http://www.answerbag.com/a_view/2691789 , for how to FORGIVE cheaters. YOU will also need to forgive yourself, you know. And if he truly forgives you, then things CAN be MUCH better in your later relationship. You will BOTH have to work on it, though. Good luck. ;-)

I dunno, why?

You don't know how to say "No". It's a common problem and maybe some assertiveness training would help if you want to keep your boyfriend.

Weak....I've been tempted, but put an end to anything before it even happened.

Good question. I think you are the only person that really knows why. So Why?

Could it be because you're a lying, cheating, lowest-life-form kinda woman?

My friend that is something that only you should know the answer to.So if you care to share tell us why you did such a thing. lol

Idk

Cheating is perfectly natural. Human beings have an urge to "gene shop." For women, one guy might seem to have better traits for sprog production while another might have the right traits for actually raising a child.

Um haha the only answer that comes to mind is a 4 letter word that starts with an "S" and ends with a "T" and has an lu in the middle, keep your legs closed

sounds like you were being selfish....

Because cheating is exciting and it adds spice to the norms of a loving relationship. When you cheat, you live on the edge a little.

Selfish

It was an accident? I did the same, u don realize what ur doing until ur doing it. It doesn't help either when ur alone with a guy n feel pressured. No one knows that feeling. Don't listen to these ppl, there cutting u down. U do love ur bf. Why would u be trying on here looking for answers if u didn't care? Ppl are ridiculous. Things happen, I feel you. Cas I've been through the same shit. U just have to talk to him n explain everything that happened. Tell him how u feel give it ur all n if he doesn't take u back obviously he never had feelings for you cas if he did he'd stil be there by urside sayin it'll be okay. Let him kno u don wana hurt him, u might have to give up some things for him as in talking to guys for awhile just to get some trust. N ur not a cheating whore or w/e ppl are saying. They don kno u. Ima sweet girl I cheated on my bf but that doesn't mean ppl can call me things. Atleast I know I've done wrong the one comments right, n I jus learned from it, u need to jus forgive urself. Some ppl its hard to say no. Expecially when every guy trys gettin at you. I just think for now on get ur head cleared up. Think what your doing n show ppl u only want him n thts it. They'll back off. But don't let ppl tell you that you don love him. That's so ignorant cas I love my bf to death n idc what they think. I just don't want them getting to your head. Good luck tho:)

Because you are a woman and can not be trusted.

No self control and you were not being honest with yourself. I am sure it was for the moment and probably regret it.

well. maybe your not really and TOTALLY in love with your boyfriend.. Real Love stays put. You OWE him to tell him if you haven't That's called respect. then I hope he kicks you to the curb, If you loved him TOTALLY...You wouldn't have done what you did. How would YOU FEEL. The guy deserves better.

ok i can tell u that some people do things just to please other people. you know its sort of like peer presure.just to gain a name or to feel popular or special.Or because they maybe have bin through so much painfull experiences in their life time that even when true love hits them in the face they dont know how to deal with it or to love back cuz they never knew what love is to begin with.some people wake up and realize wat the hell am i doing i have the real deal. an some people keep hurting people and never wake up and end up losing the one that was meant for them.

My guess is because he is better looking and you figured you could get away with it. You asked this question over 3 years ago, and you still sign on now and then. How did it turn out?

Because you don't know what love is. Simple.

Same reason you asked a question about it, I guess - for the attention?

heat of the moment

Can I buy 2 letters? An O and an H please..

You're horny, we all are. When you are really with the right one you may be able to control yourself. Maybe not.

Well, obviously you're not the brightest person. Now your EX-boyfriend is free of you and will find someone hotter and more respectful. :) Don't worry, I've cheated on my spouse several times, you are not alone in this.

Because your Insane.

because the word love is used so much now its lost meaning if you truly did love him you would have not done what you did,but that's what i think you should ask yourself that? because you are the only one that knows

Maybe a momentary lapse of judgement or... you didn't care for him the way you thought you did. A lot of people get confused about whether they are in love or just attached to someone... you can form a dependancy on another person that is almost like a drug.

'Cause you wanted to. Cheating was more important to you than your boyfriend at that moment in time. Why else would you cheat?

Because you have a history of sexual abuse. You confuse love with touch.

Either you was mad at him (consciously or subconsciously), horny or very intoxicated.

Because you got paid for it? Oh wait.. is this a riddle?

The monkey just wanted another banana I believe.

That is actually not that uncommon. Most people, especially women, who cheat, are in loving relationships. I don't know why this is, but it's pretty common. For more information look at www.thisamericanlife.org there is a great story on infidelity.

because you're a slut maybe?

You were not thinking straight. +5