Do you ever find yourself wondering why you bother trying to maintain friendships and relationships with other people?
by 
PrettyPirate
ANSWERS: 27
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A life without friends or family is a rather pointless one.
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Since my favorite word is "friend", no. I think the word "friend" trumps love..too much bad stuff is done in the name of love..if the friendship is true, good and pure, only good comes from it. I bother because it is part of the joy of living..a very big part! :)
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No. I can't imagine life without friends and friendship. It sounds as if it would be pretty dull.
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Not often, because I am one of those people who tends not to bother as much as they should in the first place. But there are enough times my friends frustrate me that I do question if it is worth the (little) effort I have put in, and that kind of vindicates my decision to an extent. Just f*** 'em all and buy a parrot that talks.
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Just for the people that don't seem to correspond the same way. Then such friendship cools off.
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Yes, I have given up on this personally.
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In my opinion friendship should be a mutual association. If one party has to work harder than the other to keep the relationship then that's putting a strain on the friendship and would be one-sided. If someone wants me as their friend they would show interest and I would reciprocate; if they don’t show interest then why bother?
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Yes. I have 'dropped' friends because they never reciprocated contacts.
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All the time, m'goose. I'm sorry if that pisses you off.
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I find myself wondering that almost daily. I just figured it was because I really don't like people...maybe I'm not so abnormal after all. (and I really do like some people..lol)
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Yes and also I find any atrain on a relationship is always brought back to be my fault somehow! I am at a stage now i'd prefer to stay home in bed its far easier
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I have three general "buckets" now: close friends, casual friends, and people I think I can help. The close friends get a lot of effort and attention, and I'll notice quickly if it seems like they're losing interest or not willing to put out the effort. The casual friends are people I like, but for whatever reason we've not really bonded in a long-term, deeper way. I will generally not put a lot of effort into these relationships, but I enjoy seeing them, talking, or whatever... but if there's a conflict, well... it's really a rather disposable relationship. The 3rd category are folks from whom I do not expect equivalent effort: they may be nasty or rude or ungrateful or who knows what... but if I have taken on the responsibility for trying to help them in some way, I tolerate a lot of that. I generally don't take it personally -- they're beset by their own demons, that's part of what I'm out to help with, usually. I see this as mainly a form of service, not really friendship. Of course, if it becomes too much, or it looks hopeless, there's always the option to drop the relationship.
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I have felt like that before. Times when I didn't want to let go of someone who, for whatever reason, just couldn't hang in there. And for me, there have been times when I was so overwhelmed with my own pain that I couldn't stand the thought of burdening someone else with it, so I abandoned the friendship. Either way, it can be excruciating. In the last few years, I have accepted that some people are going to come in and out of my life and some will go and never come back. A few will stay. I just really don't want to miss anything because I've gotten caught up in obsessing on these things I can't control.
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Finding the time to invest in and maintain relationships is something that I always struggle with. I would be a fool to expect anything different from those I would call my friends.
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Once upon a time I used to; but not anymore because I realized people just keep me around for my help and resourcefulness. My one and only best friend is my Mum.
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I have felt like that about many people. I had one "friend" in particular that would call me fat, short, big butt, flat chest, etc. When in actuality, she was heavier, not that much taller, and had a flat butt and while my breasts weren't as large as hers, I most definately was not flat-chested. I used to think of myself as very undesirable for my middle school years because of the constant teasing since we were younger. She was my only "friend" at the time and once I realized that I shouldn't let her treat me like that, I terminated our "friendship". As soon as I got rid of her, I found that I became more confident and realized that a lot of people actually found me to be much, much more attractive than the way that she made me feel and that they were just too afraid to come up to tell me.
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Yes i have and its not a great feeling, now i'm alive because of a friend and some days i'm glad to have her as a friend, others i think i don't deserve her, i think it all the depends on how depressed i am, the good thing is that i am working on getting better.
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I say build bridges, don't burn them. You never know who's on the other side. Quit keeping score, but don't be taken advantage of. Forgive, don't hold grudges. Remember we are all human. We all make mistakes and you will want to be forgiven for the mistakes you make. Treat others as you would want to be treated and let your heart be your guide. True friendship is priceless and you have to be a friend to make a friend.
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Did I mention I was a monk?
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Yes. I have gotten to the point where I don't try so hard. I've always been disappointed with the outcomes. If I manage to make and keep a friend, that's great. If I don't...whatever.
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i wonder so often why i try so hard to maintain friendships, why on earth am I trying so hard for people to like me...its a major problem for me as i can never accept that a relationship is over (does not matter if its something romantic with a person of the opposite sex or a frienship)it was heart breaking for me when distance came between me and the people i cared about. i try so so hard to maintain contact with those people because it scares me to know that they can not be part of my life anymore! :-(
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I try to develop relationships again after many months of no contact whatsoever and now I realize why I didn't bother all these months. Some people are just nuts and I can't handle the drama.
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Yes I have. There was one person who Freq'd me. I accepted but she never replied to my attempts to interact with her so I deleted her. After that she Freq'd me twice again but I denied both requests. I still have no idea why she ever sent those requests. It was like being stalked by someone who had no interest in me.
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No, I always know my intentions...
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Yes and I have learnt from others that with the ebb and flow of life, that if one can count five true and enduring friendships / relationships during one's life we are doing well.
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all the time. Me and my husband always have people over for dinner and never get a return invite and i think thats really rude. we really try with our friends buts its got the point where im sick of trying! me and my husband are like best friends anyway so we have a laugh even when its just us, so i dont worry about it anymore. my moto - only care about people that care about you
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They gave up on me, so I gave up on them. I see it as being adrift from the shipwreck that was once my life. There is no longer a search and rescue party, and it is all up to me. So here I float.
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