ANSWERS: 4
  • There is something wrong with them, if indeed your description is accurate. You don't try to "figure out" someone else's psychological problems. You accept that that's the way they are and try to get them professional help if you plan to keep them in your life. The only reason to try and "figure them out" is to learn HOW they act and know it is a part of their mental illness and they can't help it. They didn't ask to be that way any more than you asked to be irrationally anxious and worried about everyone else's problems. Are you sure you're not just using their mental issues as a way not to work on your own? Because YOU are the only person YOU can fix. Let it go. You're wasting energy focusing on the issues of others. You have enough to do to fix you.
    • Linda Joy
      Another thing to consider is that perhaps it is your perception of others and their feelings that is skewed. Strangers should not be expected to coddle your feelings. That doesn't mean they don't care deeply about the feelings of those they are close to. Frankly YOU don't seem to be overly concerned with the feelings of religious people. What's wrong with you that you don't care about the feelings of those who disagree with YOU? You call them names and make fun of them.
    • Shadow
      I don’t use their mental issues to work on my own. My perception of people is not skewed because I see them for how they really are. I care for feelings even if it means that a family member is a religious weirdo. I don’t feel hate or anger towards religious weirdos. What goes on in their delusional head is up to them to deal with. As a human I feel emotions the same as anyone else including someone who has their head on cloud nine. Religious weirdos lack in heart because their focus is what goes on in their head and not their heart. That’s a mistake. Calling them religious weirdos does not mean I don’t care for them. They just have mind problems to sort out as they have been brainwashed by mind controlling people.
    • Linda Joy
      No, atheists are under delusion. And you use the behavior of others to persuade yourself THEY are wrong and not YOU! But what you don't see is that it doesn't matter. YOU CAN'T CHANGE THEM, so work on you. It doesn't matter what others think. And if you really cared you wouldn't be calling them wrong and disagreeing with them. They can't help their mental illness, if they even have one.
    • Shadow
      No. Religious weirdos are delusional because they initiate claims of their god and religious bull$hit. You’re wrong about atheists because you don’t understand us. That’s your problem. It sounds like you and I do not see eye to eye because you’re a religious weirdo and I’m not.
    • Linda Joy
      That's o.k. I have atheist friends too, and I can agree to disagree.
  • "It’s only human to show empathy and understanding and to have an emotional connection" - no, this is not correct. This "rule of life" of yours is only valid from your own perspective - it doesn't necessarily apply to others who look at things from different perspectives. You live in a sheltered existence that feeds on emotional support from others. ### "If you hold a permanent view of yourself as a victim, you become your own oppressor." - Candace Owens
    • Shadow
      Since you think I am wrong that makes you insensitive which is an ugly thing to have on the inside. Anyone can have a different perspective to mine which I can accept but to lack in heart and emotions is not being much of a human. I do not stoop to that level. People who lack in heart, empathy and understanding are either a sociopath or psychopath or both.
    • Army Veteran
      If what you say is true, then aren't you being insensitive to my perspective? Are you not judging me? You said, "Anyone can have a different perspective to mine which I can accept but to lack in heart and emotions is not being much of a human." The key point in this statement focuses on what YOU can accept. Again, neither my perspective nor anyone else's matters to you. It's all about you and your needs, and this is what makes you wrong.
    • Shadow
      I am correct in what I say and it does not make me insensitive. I am aware of people when they are in my presence and I can sense their emotions. I do not judge you if I say you are insensitive. You were quoting what I said and then you said I was wrong. I am just correcting what you said and not judging you by saying that you’re being insensitive. I can accept different perspectives on things but I know I am right on this. If a person does not have empathy, understanding and emotional connection that makes them either a psychopath or sociopath and that they have personal issues to deal with
    • Army Veteran
      So which am I - a psychopath or a sociopath? How can I be either one if you don't know anything about my mental stability? "I do not judge you if I say you are insensitive." - I'm sorry, but that's exactly what you're doing. You contradict yourself.
    • Linda Joy
      Yep, you're judging everyone who disagrees with you to be weirdos, insensitive, inhuman, etc. But like you said that's YOUR issue and not mine. I'm not the one worried about other people's mental issues.
    • Shadow
      I don’t contradict myself Army Veteran because I never judge anyone based on a perception different to mine. Everyone has emotions some of which are not in tune with. You are wrong about me. You have the wrong idea. Calling a person insensitive is not a judgment. It’s an observation based on the person’s lack of heart and lacking in emotional intelligence.
    • Shadow
      Linda Joy, I’m not worried about the mental issues of strangers. I care about someone’s mental health if they are in my presence because it’s in my nature to care but I don’t get involved with people’s issues since that is a different matter.
    • Army Veteran
      "Calling a person insensitive is not a judgment." - I hate to destroy your "the-world-according-to-Shadow" mindset, but calling a person ANYTHING is a judgment. Once again, we're looking at perspectives here. I find it ironic that you suspect me of being a psychopath and yet, you're living with the dominant mother. I can't help but picture scenes of a dark house overlooking a rundown motel (which, by the way, was also located in Pennsylvania). Your real name wouldn't be Norman, would it? (Asking for a friend...)
    • Shadow
      Calling a person certain things is an observation depending on how that person displays themselves. A psychopath or sociopath is an observation if they are heartless, uncaring, insensitive, lacking in empathy and no understanding. Those are all the traits of either a psychopath or sociopath. If you can’t see it that way it means you might have problems that may need to be addressed to. My name is not Norman but I know what you’re getting at. My mother is alive and I don’t dress in her clothes and I don’t run a motel. You have the wrong idea about that.
    • Army Veteran
      "Psychopath and sociopath" are synonymous terms that describe a person with antisocial personality disorder (ASPD). The flaw in your diagnosis of me is that you are the one who is antisocial, not me ("Would anyone blame me for being anti social to avoid peer pressure from groups of people?") You know nothing about me except that I don't play the sympathy game and give you constant reassurances to support your emotional needs like everyone else here does. And because I don't, you label me as "heartless, uncaring, insensitive, lacking in empathy and no understanding." You call it an "observation" - but again, that's from your perspective (see how it always gets back to perspectives?). But it doesn't really matter to me because I don't get offended by it (that must be where my "insensitivity" kicks in). As for the motel bit, now that we've determined that you're the one with ASPD, I'd like to inquire about any kind of veteran or senior citizen rates you might offer...?
    • Shadow
      Those terms also fit in with certain traits like insensitivity, being heartless, lacking in empathy and lacking in understanding. I don’t have ASPD. If I have it I would mention it. In fact I am somewhat sociable with selective people. I did not diagnose you with anything. It’s usually a person’s choice of words or how they display themselves that makes them either a psychopath or sociopath. It’s not a judgment. It’s an observation as to how things really are. Obviously you did not read my previous response with attention. I already said I know what you are getting at. Asking me if my name is Norman implies a joke or something based on the movie Psycho. I knew what you said was some sort of dark humour so I continued with it in my words.
    • Army Veteran
      (Blink, blink) - I don't know what you just said, but I'll defend your right to say it.
    • Shadow
      You made a reference to the movie Psycho when you asked me if my name is Norman so I went along with the joke.
    • Linda Joy
      I didn't know your mother was still alive! I thought you lived with a drug addicted cousin that does your shopping. BTW there are differences between a psychopath and a sociopath, and you don't judge them by what they say or how they present themselves online. They are diagnosed by their ACTIONS. Which you can't even see online.
    • Shadow
      True I can’t see them online but sometimes with some people online they say insensitive things. There is nobody in my family who is a drug addict Linda Joy. I would know if there was one in my family. The whole mother thing came about when Army Veteran asked me is my name Norman which is a reference to Alfred Hitchcock’s Psycho movie.
    • Army Veteran
      I know more about sympathy than you could ever imagine. Sympathy is a tool that is used to manipulate people's emotions - just like you try to do with many of your questions when you seek emotional support. But I don't feed your obsession, and so you post questions referring to me as a troll so that others will rally around you and advise you on how to handle the problem - the sympathy well never runs dry, does it?
    • Shadow
      I do not manipulate others. That’s not in my nature. How did you come to that conclusion Army Veteran? You have the wrong idea about me. I never said you were a troll. You may say certain things that I don’t agree with but everyone has their own opinions and views. Calling me manipulative is your assumption which is wrong. At least I show heart. You don’t know anything about me in the real world and you assume the wrong things about me. To assume makes an “ass” out of “u” and “me”
    • Army Veteran
      When you sit here and say "feel sorry for me" and others give you the encouragement you seek - that is manipulation. "...but everyone has their own opinions and views." - is that so? Then why do you call me a sociopath? You speak with forked tongue, shadow-dude. I know about manipulation - it takes different forms.
    • Shadow
      I do feel sorry for people who say what’s going on in their lives and how they are affected. I would never lie about that but if you don’t take my word for it that would be your problem. Of course we have our own opinions and views. That’s the reality of people. I was mentioning sociopath based on some of the things you say which comes across as insensitive. Perhaps not everyone who says insensitive things are not necessarily a sociopath so I am correcting myself on that. I would never manipulate anyone. I like to be as real as they come. I like to listen to what people say what’s going on in their lives out of interest and I do care about that.
    • Army Veteran
      This is funny: "I was mentioning sociopath based on some of the things you say which comes across as insensitive." - You were "mentioning"? Is "mentioning" easier to say than "I judged you"? I know about sympathy - I see it all the time in its many forms. Sympathy was behind both world wars and it continues to be used to manipulate the emotions of those who fell under its spell - rooted so deeply that their kids, grandkids, and future generations will naturally gravitate toward it (maintain a specific narrative long enough and it becomes a fact - this is what the Democrats are doing. They are nothing but manipulative liars, but they maintain those lies until people start believing them to be true). Political correctness is a cancer on society, based on Communism, that feeds off of sympathy - everyone had to be accepted equally, even if they weren't equal. Everyone got a participation trophy so they wouldn't get hurt feelings for being left out, and offending anyone for anything was deemed just short of a federal crime. This is how you are able to receive the emotional support that you do - people are being pressured into not offending you. You exhibit emotional issues on a much smaller scale, but even at your level, you require sympathy to support you. And whenever you post things like "Would anyone blame me for being anti social to avoid peer pressure from groups of people?" you are manipulating people into giving you emotional support. You think of me as insensitive - actually, I'm not politically correct. And because I'm not, I refuse to get caught up in everyone's drama. When people don't allow themselves to become prisoners of their own insecurities, they might feel a ton of weight lifted off of their shoulders.
    • Shadow
      Mentioning is the right word Army Veteran. As a pacifist, I wish there was never any wars. I create my own inner peace which I suggest to anyone so as they can live their life without affecting other people’s rights. When I asked the question that you quoted I mean to say it’s probably better off that I am anti social towards people in general but not the selective people I prefer to be around with as I am somewhat sociable. I don’t manipulate anyone with that question. You misunderstand my question.
    • Army Veteran
      As a pacifist, you would never serve in the military to defend your country. That places the burden on the rest of us. Is that how you find your inner peace?
    • Shadow
      I don’t have what it takes to be in the military. I don’t think about war. I find my inner peace where there is no conflict. I’m just an average citizen that likes to live my life the way I want to rather than being told by someone else how I should position myself with others. Some people are willing to risk their lives to protect their country and others don’t have the same bravery. I am a pacifist based on the fact that I have nothing to do with other people’s conflict which causes war. There is conflict in war. The burden is on those who choose to be part of the world’s problems. I find my inner peace staying away from people who do wrong and I am selective of people who have a sense of morality and a sense of heart and who know how to respect an individual for being themselves.
  • They are self-centered.
    • Linda Joy
      And now that you mention it, ALL HUMANS are born that way! Babies barely know anyone else exists, and they certainly don't care about anyone else's feelings!
  • Genetics, upbringing and life experience affects these abilities. Often you will find people like this in high driven jobs, police officers, judges, solicitors, surgeons, in fact in a Surgeon it can excel because he will be able to make decisions without emotional involvement and as such emotions will not cloud his judgement and performance.

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