ANSWERS: 8
  • Yes. "He's a domestic abuser" - that's enough to leave. Regarding comment: If she stays, she's doing it because for her children. But he'll abuse them eventually. I feel it is wrong to stay with him.
  • This is a no-brainer. Yes, of COURSE she should take the children and leave! Neither the drug-dealing lifestyle nor the domestic abuse are good environments to be in, for ANYONE, let alone children and the woman raising them. Just by being a financial support does not mean he is providing amply for her or the children. He is not offering them freedom or safety and who in this relationship thinks living a drug-dealer's life is a good, long term investment for anyone's future? It has a pretty high failure rate because it's illegal, dangerous and immoral. Help her realize the best course is for her to take the first step at being the best mother to her children she can be and LEAVE. There are many organizations around to help do just this. Best wishes to you and them!
  • No one deserves to be abused. It doesn't matter how much a person feels indebted to another. Being lavished with nice things does not support abuse. The woman should go to a woman's shelter and bring her children with her. This is her safest bet. Also, there cannot be much love in the relationship if he is abusive. She is only staying with him to make sure the children (and herself) are well privided for. She needs to get herself and her children in a better atmosphere.
  • pick your reason, the drug dealing or the abuse, they're both good enough reasons to leave, and in conjuction should put the man in jail. 4 children is a large burden even for well off parents, but significantly harder for a single mother, however there are programs to help women in such cases, as well as relatives who may be able to assist you. But drug-dealing is a terrible and illigal way to make a living, and one day, if he does not stop, he WILL be caught, and then what? then you're alone with the 4 kids anyways, why wait? besides. hopefully your kids don't know what he does yet, it's best to leave now before they do. And the fact that he abuses you is just as bad. No one deserves such treatment. abuse is not characteristic of love, this man does not deserve you, especially after having four of his children. In fact, this abuse may come from drug usage, he may be on these drugs he sells. these traits make for a poor father at best, you're better without him i know it sounds hard, and i know i don't know "the whole story" but you need to leave him, get out now while you can, don't endanger your children by having them around him, in his environment, not endangering yourself
  • STAYING would be my second choice, any other option would be number 1.
  • John, regardless of the fact he provides for her with blood money, means nothing. Exposing those poor children to abuse and drugs is unthinkable. The reason she stays is because she is co-dependent, and in the cycle of abuse. As I have said before, I volunteer at a women's shelter who have been abused. They stay and stay and stay till they are nearly dead, and why? Because they are afraid of their man, and continue to believe he will change. She can stay, that is her problem but I worry about those children, that is neglect and its only a matter of time till he starts abusing them, which he probably already has. She has a choice, even though that is not her mind set right now. She should go to the Court or Police and get a Restraining Order, and an order for child support! That could very well save those children.
  • No, he should. She should file domestic abuse charges, a restraining order and petition for child support.
  • Rat him out to the cops so he goes to jail for dealing drugs. Problem solved.

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