ANSWERS: 100
  • "Every day there's a morning."
  • "I won't hug a tree and I won't have my diaper changed"- quote Me.
  • i TA for a special eductaion class. we were having a "reading time" and all the kids were completely quite (which doesn't happen very often at all, might i add) and a little boy named Garrett with autism started sing "I SHOT THE SHERIFF, BUT I DIDNT SHOOT THE DEPUTY!" it was adorable.
  • My three year old son was lying on the floor and my eight month old daughter got ahold of his hair. He starts screaming ladies and gentelmen help.
  • "Your not listening to my words"- my baby sister when she was 4.
  • My nephew put on a towel as a cape one day and said "Who needs to be saved?!" my niece screamed out (whose 2 0r 3) "SAVE ME!" it was funny and cute
  • OH YEAH .. my nephew was talking to somebody when he was bout 3 or 4.. they was ignoring him and he said.. "u should have just told me if u didn't want to hear that bullcrap"
  • my nephew is 3 and i wouldnt open the bathroom door when he asked he was lim fine i dont have time for ur bullshit anyway. then there was this one time he kissed a girl n daycre n my sis found out n she started to have a talk with him he cut her off n was like fine i get it mom can i watch spiderman now.
  • "I know my older sister loves me because she gives me all her old clothes and has to go out and buy new ones." Lauren - age 4
  • A little girl in a Witchcraft shop I was in this past Sunday was calling the fairies "butterfly angels." Her dad kept saying, "fairies," but she insisted, "butterfly angels!" Was very cute!!!!
  • 'Sophie, what does gay mean?' my neighbour said to me once. 'It means when a man and a man love each other' I replied. 'Like how my brother loves my daddy?' she asked. I hate her brother. 'Probably...' I replied. It was very funny, she spent the day calling him gay, and when he tried to say she was a lesbian she kept shouting 'I ain't no lebinum!' I'm just cruel sometimes...
  • Adult: "When were you born?" Child (in a matter-of-fact voice): "On my Birthday." I don't remember who said this it was really cute though.
  • A little girl was told that her oldest sister was going to have a baby and she would be an aunt, said, "I dont want to be an ant, I want to be a butterfly!"
  • When my oldest daughter was 3 we were teasing each other and I said, "Aundie, you're goofy!" and she said, "No I'm not! Goofy got the job!". For the life of me I don't know where she came up with that one, but I laughed until I cryed. Then she said, "If you want me to be Goofy, it's ok mommy, I just need longer ears."
  • Once my niece, when she was 2, said to her twin brother "Good boy" - I guess she heard us saying that enough.;)
  • My 3 year old son always says,"Mommy, youre my favorite friend". I love when he says that! His twin sister always says,"Mommy,youre so prettyful". ,its a combination of pretty and beautiful!!!
  • Through out the years I've heard quite a few things. Many came from a show hosted by Art Linkletter and later hosted by Bill Cosby. Lets see if you like this one from a different source: (its clean) An 8-year-old girl went to her dad, who was working in the yard. She asked him, "Daddy, what is sex?" The father was surprised that she would ask such a question, but decided that if she is old enough to ask the question, then she is old enough to get a straight answer. He proceeded to tell her all about the birds and the bees. When he finished explaining, the little girl was looking at him with her mouth hanging open. The father asked her, "Why did you ask this question?" The little girl replied, "Mom told me to tell you that dinner would be ready in just a couple of secs."
  • my 2 year old son with his arms as wide as I could get them said "I love you this much mommy fo eva an eva", and when he burped on time I asked him what he says when he burps he said "escuse me I farted out my mouth",
  • My best childhood friend, when his mum was pregnant said: 'is the baby in a car seat in your tummy?' He also screamed, when his sock got sucked up the vacum: 'sock gone up the hoopoo, SOCK GONE UP THE HOOPOO' When i was little i went to the toilet in the doctors surgery and someone was obviously very ill, as i walked out i said at the top of my (very high a sqeeky) voice: 'yuk, it smells like when daddy uses the toilet' haha! and one more... When my brother was little we went on holiday to france, and stayed in a family run hotel type thing, in the morning we came down and everyone said 'good morning'. In the evening we came down for dinner and my brothr said: 'good morning, good morning, good morning' ... awww!
  • The other day my three year old sister came up to me and said sissy why you have boobs and I don't? i was like what? but she just has the cutest voice ever.
  • My 2 year old hurt his heal after jumping off the couch. When I asked him where it hurt, he sobbed, "My chintoe!" After a good laugh I had him point to where it hurt and explained to him that it wasn't called a "chintoe" to which he responded, "Well, then my . . .my back toe."
  • I don't know if it really happened, but I heard a joke once that applies to this question: A kidnergarden teacher found out that a boy in the class had a pet hampster. She asked the boy (we'll call him Tommy), "Tommy, would you like to show your hampster to the class at show-n-tell tomarrow?" Tommy: "I can't I think he died last night." Teacher: "Are you sure? How do you know he wasn't just sleeping? Tommy: "I pissed in his ear and he didn't move" Teacher (somewhat indignantly): "You did WHAT!" Tommy: "You know, I got down went, 'PSSST' in his ear."
  • My friend's little girl, 4 years old, was showing me some of her drawings. My friend lit a scented candle, when Chloe smelt it she said 'Mummy, smell my nose.'
  • My friend was giving a 7 year old a piggy back when she started to say, "I'm peeing." It was actually really funny and very cute how she said it.
  • He said, "Hot lava will burn your skin off," but it sounded like, "Hot lovin' will burn your skin off." It came out of nowhere and left us dumbfounded.
  • I got two of them. I was working with autistic children. It was circle time and we were singing a song about the days of the week. Now I can't carry a tune to save my life. Well one of the kids got so fed up he stood up, walked over to me and put his hand on over my mouth and said NO! The other one happened at the children's hosp were I vol. There was a little boy about 4 yrs. old. He truly was a wise man in a little boys body. Anyways, he took a play set off the shelf to play with. I told him that we didn't have any people to go with it and he turned around and waved me off saying don't worry so much it will work.
  • My wife and 18 month old daughter were playing on the floor with a toy phone when my daughter passed the phone to my wife. Wife- "Hello?" Wife- "who is it?" Baby- "use ur majin ashun" We cracked up so hard, that was funny.
  • My granddaughter was 4 when she learned that my mother (her great-grandma) had died. She said to me, "so now, you can do anything you want?" Sorta put things in perspective!
  • When my daughter was 2, I was scolding her for something she had done and she was fussing back so I told her not to back-talk me. She then, in as sweet a voice and as serious as she could be, said "I'm not back-talking, Mommy, I'm front-talking" because she was talking to my face, not my back. I asked my 2 year old for a kiss and hug the other day, and very gently and sweetly he said, "No thank you, Mommy". My brothers are 16 months apart and slept in separate cribs. One morning my mom went in to get them and my youngest brother's crib was went because his diaper leaked, so he said that Brother did it, then he said Teddy did it. Then when my other brother's bed was wet he said his "woos" did it, his imaginary friends. My grandfather, who passed away last spring, loved to remind me of his favorite thing I said. We lived in New Jersey when I was 2 and when they came to visit, we went to the beach. My grandfather took me to the water's edge and when the water touched my toes I jumped, ran, and said "Jars (jaws) get me, Jars get me!"
  • When my granddaughter was 2 1/2 we were all sitting at the table. My son, and daughter in law got Happy Meals and were reading off some pretty funny things from inside the meal. Then my GD said out of the blue "knock knock" and we said "whose there?" She said "orange" and we all said "Orange who" and she said "orange ya glad I didn't answer the door" We all wondered where it came from or where she heard it, so we all laughed and she said "I have more, but I really need to eat, thank you." Gotta love those toddlers..
  • WUV U !!!
  • my now 4 year old cousin (with autism) is probably the most intelligent kid i know. he has a very strong vocab for his age. when he was 2 he when we would eat dinner he would always say how the dinner was "deeeeeliscious". when he knows that he is in trouble too... he will climb up on your lap and tell you how beautiful you are and how much he loves you. and then kiss you. he seems to think that he is out of trouble if he does that (which he usually is). and a few months ago i was playing with him and i sat on him... he goes "ulgh get off... you have a big butt!". mind you im 5'7" 116 lbs. and then he had to tell me after that, that i had a BUDDA BELLY! children i swear. haha. gotta love them!
  • When my nephew Justin was three, he was visiting my house with his dad. My ex-wife and I had a cat (Bigfoot) that was the most lovable lump of cat you ever met. Justin knew Bigfoot and would always head right to the cat and pick him up. Bigfoot was usually very complacent when Justin picked him up, but this time, after Justin carried him around the house for about a half hour, Bigfoot made a break for it. In the process, Bigfoot got his claws into Justin's arm. Justin looked at me with big eyes, pointed to Bigfoot and said "Him have sharp piggies!"
  • When my daughter was 4 we were doing some pre-Kindergarten learning at home. We were going through ending sounds and I asked her what was at the end of dog (meaning she was supposed to answer G). She answered "a tail".
  • my nephew was trying to explain something but my parents were talking over him, and finally he stood up and said "i am tryin to talk here!"
  • My granddaughter came home from 1st grade with the chicken poxes. I asked her how she caught them. She told me," I must of got them when I went bowling with my Mommy and Daddy. Daddy gave me 50 cents to get a toy from the chicken machine and that chicken must of gave them to me." I asked her u don't think u got them cause the boy sitting next to u had them. She said. "No everyone knows chicken have chicken poxes and boys just got cooties!"
  • It was 5 pm and time for dinner. my wife and i were raising our two grandaughters. we are all seated at the kichen harvest table and it was time for the news. everyone was chattering. i said, "everyone shutup, i want to hear the news". We had a small 10" tv on the table. There was a dead silence. My three year old grandaughter lowered her fork, slowly lifted her head, looked at me and said....... "Hushup, papa. your're a smart ass and i've had enough". We all died laughing.
  • my cousin was just a kid when I asked her this. We were playin some gameshow. I asked her "where were u born?" thinkin that she'd tell the location and she said "hospital" I don't know where'd she get that.
  • i was talking to my 8 year old son one day durring lunch and we just finished moving in to our new house and having pizza. while i was talking to him my 3 year old son walked over to my 8 year old grabbed his pizza and left when we noticed he was gone we started looking for and found him in between the fridge and counter. when he realized we had caught him he walks over to my 6 month old daughter puts the rest of the pizza on her and said " I didn't do it" and started crying. me and my wife laughed the whole day and we still tease him even though he is 14
  • My daughter and her friend were playing at 'Dr Who', my daughter was chasing her friend round the room saying, "I am a garlick I will exterminate'.... Another time she told her big brother not to touch the plug as he would get an electric shark..
  • When they were 3, my twins would stand on chairs at the table and help unpack the bags of groceries as the older 2 boys helped me carry them in and put them away. I looked over at the table to see Jesse pull a double-sided plastic food and water dish out of a bag for the cat. I then heard him say to his brother, "LOOK DOUG! New cereal bowls! Now, we can eat together!"
  • My younger cousin was about 7 and shook his butt at a girl at church and the girl came up to my aunt and asked her "did you see what your son did to me?! He shook his HINEY at me!"
  • My buddy and I were baby-sitting the 6-year-old son of one of my mom's friends. He begged us to tie him up and hang him off the second floor balcony by his ankles. It may sound disturbing but something about the way he said it was sickeningly cute. (For the record, we did NOT do it. He got mad and stopped being cute. Weird kid...)
  • Why is uncle D fighting aunt Laurie without his clothes on??
  • one yime my baby cousin who was 3 at the time pointed at my boobs and said, wow my mommy has those, when do mine come! lol it was so funny i could not sto laughing!
  • My sibling addressing the fridge, "Figgymater!"
  • I don't know if it's the cutest, but it was the funniest thing I've ever heard in a non-PC sort of way. I was at the park with my ex and her daughter and there was a clock tower near by. Here daughter says "Hey mom, look at that big clock". BUT, she had a problem pronouncing L's, so it actually came out sounding a bit different. We got a lot of looks.
  • We were in one of my classes, and there is a boy who is extremly quiet. we were learning strange facts about states in USA when someone called out "california" he just burst out singing the OC theme song "californiaaa"
  • When my daughter was about 18 months old, I was in the dining room and heard the computer come on behind me. I turn around and there she is, standing on the desk chair, watching the computer boot up. I said, "What do you think you are doing?" She replied, "gettin' online, checkin' ma mail"
  • This is not an account from me but from JD. But thought you'd like to hear it anyways. JD gives his 4 year old daughter a smell of his wine. Daughter: That smells bad JD: Well, thats why u shouldnt drink it. It teastes bad too. Daughter: But that cant be true, Daddy! You're ALWAYS drinking wine!!
  • When Jake was about three he looked up at me and saw his reflection in my eyes and said " I can see me in you eyes" I almost cryed!
  • I asked my little boy what he wanted to be when he grows up and he thought about it for a sec and said casually, "A sandwich!"
  • I am currently pregnant and I have a 7 year old son. One day he came up to my belly and said "Sister I have to tell you... it's cold when you come out of there" And I said "Do u remmber that?" And he said " No, but come on Mom your naked when you come out"
  • When my sister had a baby, my 4-year-old asked how baby's get out of your tummy. I told her you go to the doctor and they help get them out. She asked, "do they come out your butt or out your vagina?" I told her "out your vagina" and then she asked, "but how, that is so little?" I told her a lot of times the doctor's make a cut so the baby can get out and she said, "ohhhh, that's gotta hurt!" Thank god she didn't ask how they get in there in the first place...LOL!
  • My son came home from school and said an older boy called him four eyes, my heart just melted for him. My son said its okay mummy i called him forehead lol lol. Cute.
  • I love you poppy.
  • 'Mummy's on the toilet doing POOs!' You've got to love them at that age.
  • My 3 year old son was with his older sister and I shopping at Wal-Mart and looking at girls clothing. He stopped in front of a frilly pink dress that had a feather boa around the hanger and said, "Oh Mommy,isn't this just darling?"
  • "My tummy hurts. I think M&Ms would make it feel better"
  • "hey bro i have got a holiday in prize today".This was the response when i asked my little sleeping cousin "wont you go to school today?"
  • Tony Sharp- 4 years old, called 911 when his mom had a medical problem and saved her life. I heard about it on the radio... he had complete composure and the cutest little voice as he told his name and the situation. my little brother (age 7) yesterday was telling me about the King Tut exhibit recently brought to Philly. He filled me in on all the details like a professional, and then threw in on the end (just for my information)- "ya, he died a few days ago." I cracked up at that...
  • I love you!
  • OH! Forgot one! when my sister was learning to read, she was practicing beginning sounds. She would look through a book of pictures and sound out the beginning twice before saying the whole word: Looks at an a next to an apple "A-A-Apple." G next to a grape "G-G-Grape." B next to a bird (that looks kinda like a chicken) "B-B-Bauk" lol
  • I had to go to REGINA for a work related trip, and my daughter said Daddy is going to Vagina.
  • My friend's four year old sister says cute things all the time. She likes playing "chess" with us, which for her is just playing with the captured pieces while we actually play a game. During one game I said, "Oh no, I'm losing!" to her and she takes a knight from the pile, puts in in the middle of the board, and says, "Don't worry! We'll save you from the evil queen!" ...and proceeds to pluck the queen off the board and run off with it. I won!
  • I overheard a waitress tell a 4 or 5 year girl with red hair that the color of her hair was so beautiful. She said "Yea, and you can't get it from a bottle!!"
  • I used to just love it when my youngest niece, Sara, still couldn't pronounce the word yellow, and it always came out as "Lell-oh".
  • When i was little, i got out of the pool, and (i couldn't speak very well) said " mommy wi' you wite me aww" that means, mommy will you wipe me off, and i meant will she dry me off
  • Oh yeah, i threw a snow-ball at my friend and i missed and hit his 3 year old cousin, and his cousin turned around and said "HEY! You're a big dirtbag!"
  • We were on a walk last week, and my three year old looked up at me and said "Mommy, you know what? You're adorable." A few days later she told me "Mommy, you're a little genius!" when I figured out what she wanted me to do. And always the best is "Mommy, I love you berry berry much."
  • I heard a kid say this just yesterday while delivering a pizza to an apartment complex. The kid must have been 10-12 years old. "I'm gonna kill you you little sh*thead" I really felt all warm inside after that.
  • My mom tells a story about me when I was little and she took me upstairs to change my diaper. After she was finished, I got up and announced "Now mommy 'ie down, <my name> change mommy!" She had to explain about how she didn't wear diapers.
  • I've got two. My kid was just learning to talk, and he was rambunctious one day. I told him, "Behave! Behave!" He said, "I AM being have." Same kid, about the same time. He wanted something and couldn't have it. I told him no and why he couldn't, and I said, "Don't argue." A few minutes later he didn't like something _I_ said, and he said, "Now don't arg me."
  • Last week I went shopping with my best friend's 2 1/2 yr old daughter. We were in the fitting room and I tried on a slinky little red dress and she looked up at me and said, "Wow! That dress is really wonderful!" Then she cocked her head to the side and with a puzzled look on her face she continued, "But your belly is REALLY big!" I thought I would never stop laughing!
  • I had my monthly cycle and the blood stained on my pajama, my 3 yrs old son came rushing with something in his hand and said.. MOM! YOU HAVE A BOO BOO! HERE'S THE BETADINE!" (providone iodine)
  • Well... being chinese, you'd think we'd know some bad words... once this baby finished is bottle and accidently said the F-word in chinese... i think he was meaning to say "gone"
  • When I was helping out the small children with their crafts, there was someone who said, "I love you" to me. I thought that was the cutest thing a small child had to say to me.
  • I have so many funny, cute stories I could go on forever. I am a Sunday school teacher and have 2 year olds in my class. They are very vocal and each one likes to pray at the end of class. While they pray they often remind others to keep their eyes shut (while they're opening their eyes to look). Sometimes they will also pray for each other. Acting like mature adults they will rub each others backs and thank each other for praying for their family member etc., It is sooo...cute.
  • One of my nephews could not say my name because of a speech impediment..he called me weiner..LMAO..and it stuck ...to him I will always be weiner not DreAnna..He outgrew the speech impediment..I didnt outgrow the nickname..
  • I'm a cashier at a grocery store and one time this kid was innocently talking to his mom and out of nowhere he asked his mom if goats can wear earrings. I thought it was so funny
  • My friends sister said to her mom: Kid: Will Shana cancel school today? (it was a blizzard) Mom: Shana can't do that! Kid: Why not? She IS the school canceler! It was sooo funny. Just if you didn't get it, Shana's the councelor.
  • My five year said to my Mum, "Nanny is it true that if you can cut paper your not going to die?" I laughed but then it started to worry me what they are teaching her at school?! ;-)
  • At ski school I was helping a kid get ready for his lesson. "I like to ski cause after skiing I get hot chocolate"
  • I don't know about cute but i caught my 6yr old nephew with his female little friend up to no good...when i asked what they were upto, he replied " we're playing bums on faces!"
  • The first time my son told me he had a "poopie". It was the cutest thing he just looked up and me and smiled and pointed to his diaper and said "poopie."
  • A friend of my younger brother once bit into a lemon and said "sowee, sowee". I can still see the expression on his face.
  • My daughter is 2. She says all kinds of things that are cute, but one thing she does in particular that is just darling, I think, is when she talks, she'll say,"I want more milk-k-k-k", or "the balloon pop-p-p" Its so sweet.
  • My brother is 14 and he has like peach fuz. My 3 year old cousin goes up to him and says "cai (can I ) touch your muscrach (mustache)"
  • My daughter, after we'd walked to Dunkin Donuts looked up at me and told me "Mommy, you'we adowable!" And her statement after waving byebye and blowing kisses to her poopie before flushing... "I love poopies, butterflies and wormies."
  • My 2 year old grand daughter came to visit and i said "wow..who's the most beautiful little girl in the world" and she put her tiny little hands on either side of my face and she said "you are nanny ... you are the most booful liddle girl in the world".
  • When my little brother was still little (16 now...but it seems like only yesterday!) He told us this little joke (in the midst of the "why did the chicken cross the road" jokes) and it still cracks me up to think about it. "Well, what do you do when the chicken doesn't cross the road?.....You kick it, DUH!"
  • Mommy I love you!
  • When I was little I used to pronounce helicopter, Heck ta copter, because I thought I would get into trouble if I said the word "hell". When I was about 5 my neighbor offered me some chocolate eggs for Easter time. I told her that I couldn't eat them because I was allergic to eggs. She laughed and told me they were just chocolate. LOL!!
  • My nephew used to call all tractors peewiggers. To this day no one knows why. He grew out of it, and doesn't remember.
  • When my daughter was 10months old and learning to talk she couldnt say her "r" at the time so instead of saying Merry Christmas it sounded like "Meey Chistmas"
  • When my son was 6 and taking drum lessons he told his teacher "pants are for squares!" and then took off his pants. For no reason, out of the blue. I have no idea where that came from but the teacher was pretty shocked.
  • my son once asked me "mama who changes the batteries in the moon?"
  • My little sister says "what in the nama tarnation" it bugs me but is cute.
  • A little boy I just met said but I want you to help me fold the towels, he was helping his mom fold towels and he wanted me to help him and he such beautiful eyes and such a sincere smile I was blown away my kids don't like to help and they are teenagers and this little guy was only 4 years old!
  • I said this when I was 7 or so: Waitress was taking everyone's order. She got to me and asked, "What would you like?". I said, "Bacon and eggs". She asked, "How do you like your eggs?". I said, "I don't know. I haven't had them yet".

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