Vote Green

Interesting oxymoron there...

You can't unless you're a dog (who can type).

deliver your insults with the same amount of venom but do it with a big friendly smile on your face so everybody knows what you've said and nobody can accuse you of saying it.

lol, hmmm not sure on that one.

I think it's the way you word things. Try to make your statements authoritative yet still open. I always try to deliver a compliment with an insult.

That's pretty contradictory. Instead I'd probably want to go with: Assertive, but nice. This way you don't get walked all over, but you still have friends. You can do this by standing up for yourself and other people, but don't go out of your way to offend others.

IS there such a thing?

Be nice to people in person, then write mean things about them in myspace

You already *are*, just by asking!

Do it with a smile... ;)

Smile when you are tearing into them.

Now what fun would that be?

Hook up w/ a great b*stard? ;-)

Nice bitch... aint that an oxymoron..

do it for the sick and the needy...

SAY U LIKE SUM1S HAIR N SMILE?

with Sarcasm

Tell the person you are only doing it because you love them

Make backhand comments. I think thats what they are called. Its where you insult someone but at the same time compliment them, the offensive comment is usually overrided by the confusion of the person recieving it (becuase you dont know their intentions). Some horrible examples: " You finally got your hair cut, it looks good!" , "I like what youre wearing, its, uh, Hobo-chic", "Glad to see you change your style of clothes, you look like a girl now!", "Good thing you cleared your face up, you looked like a pizza!"

examples: Ann Coulter, Hillary Clinton, Sarah Palin This women have ice in their veins! If you like the answer, please offer me points. Thanks Chris

Do your hair;put on a pretty dress and smile!

get inspired from a nice b......!

Do what I do, when you feel like making bitchy comments, make it seem as though you're joking with people, this will make them laugh (hopefully) that way everyone is happy.

Do it for free!

Cher (the singer/actress) is MY role model! LOL

I guess you can say bitchy things and actually convince people it's for their own good! lol

The best way is if you were to wear a short skirt and buy all the drinks.. Grin..

well first you let him sniff you,that way he knows if you on heat then you stand still so he can mount you.........the rest comes naturally ps:i want dabs on the little runt

Have a noble cause. Be consistent. Be an equal-opportunity bitch that gives EVERYONE a hard time. Then you will be loved.

1) "Bitch is a term for female canines, particularly amongst dog breeders. It is also a common English vulgarism for a woman, that typically carries denigrating or misogynistic overtones —such as resemblance to a dog. Its usage may be to characterize someone as having aggressive and spiteful bitterness, or else in being in possession of rudely intrusive or domineering tendencies. This meaning has been in use since around 1400. In typical usage it indicates that the speaker has little respect for the subject person, and that the speaker considers the subject to be a lackey or else lacking in dignity. Conversely, its usage implies that the context of the statement or the speaker using the term have little association with respectability themselves. When used to describe a male, it may also confer the meaning of "subordinate", especially to another male, as in prison. Generally, this term is used to indicate that the person is acting outside the confines of their gender roles, such as when women are assertive or aggressive, or when men are passive or servile. More recent variants of bitch are bitchy, ill-tempered (1925), and to bitch, to complain (1930). In more recent usage in the context of feminism, it has varied reappropriated meanings that may connote a strong female (anti-stereotype of weak submissive woman), cunning (equal to males in mental guile), or else it may be used as a tongue-in cheek backhanded compliment for someone who has excelled in an achievement. Since the 1980s, the term "bitch" has become increasingly accepted and less offensive. After the word was widely used between rivals Krystle and Alexis on the nighttime soap-opera TV series Dynasty, it gained usage, in malicious contexts or otherwise, and is now very rarely censored on television broadcasts. Prior to the term's general acceptance, euphemistic terms were often substituted, such as "gun" in the phrase "son of a gun" as opposed to "son of a bitch", or "s.o.b." for the same phrase. More generally the term has also acquired the meaning of something unpleasant or irksome, as in the expression "Life's a Bitch"." Source and further information: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bitch 2) "Adjective nice (comparative nicer, superlative nicest) 1. Of a thing or person or event, pleasant, pretty. What a nice dress! 2. Admirable, enviable. A third-term senator holds a nice level of seniority. 3. Innocent; gentle; distinguished by perceived class or virtue. What is a nice person like you doing in a place like this? 4. Showing or requiring great precision or sensitive discernment; subtle. a nice distinction 5. Neat; elegantly succinct. Fermat believed he had a nice proof of his theorem. 6. Bordering on failure or disaster; succeeding by the narrowest of margins. "It has been a damned nice thing - the nearest run thing you ever saw in your life" -- The Duke of Wellington shortly after the Battle of Waterloo, 1815. 7. (colloquial) With "and", excellent, pleasantly. The soup is nice and hot. Quotations 1930, H.M. Walker, The Laurel-Hardy Murder Case Here's another nice mess you've gotten us into. Usage notes Sometimes used sarcastically to mean the opposite or to connote excess." Source and further information: http://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/nice 3) Assuming that you are a human, the canine meaning of bitch will not be considered... If this expression is not to become an oxymoron, we must either join two positives or two negatives. - two negatives: Take one of the denigrating meanings of bitch, and combine it with the sarcastic usage of "nice". - two positives: Take the positive, feminist meaning, and combine it with the positive meaning of nice. 4) Here an example: "B - Babe I - In T - Total C - Control of H - Herself Anonymous. I don’t know who wrote this. Someone who attended one of my teleclasses sent it to me. From my perspective, it describes the kind of person a woman has to be to get what she wants. If all the women I touch in my work could learn to internalize this concept and be nice doing it, the world would be a better place for both men and women. Does being a nice bitch sound like a contradiction? I don’t think so. It just means treating others openly, honestly and with respect. It means saying what you mean and meaning what you say. It means telling the truth and being vulnerable, as well as standing up for what you believe." Source and further information: http://ezinearticles.com/?On-Being-a-Nice-Bitch&id=19324

Say please

Just do one nice thing a day to some one random...then be a bitch to anyone you want after that. You'll have your bass covered.