• If the teachers or a principal can't work it out, I would take care of it myself.
  • Here is a link to an article on CNN about how children should handle bullies:
  • You should always be polite and kind, until the teacher leaves the room! Bullying destroys a child's self confidence. See Babycakes article.
  • I teach the children in my life to be kind, helpful and how to use their minds as their weapons; and I also teach them how to stand up for themselves and not take bullying and abuse from anyone.
  • I had occasional problems with bullies. A few I threw down with despite knowing I wouldn't win, usually in a time/place where the fight would be broken up quickly, just to show that I wasn't afraid of them. I never STARTED a fight because there is a fine line there between proving a lack of fear and becoming a bully. They quickly got bored though one actually began to respect me and we became friends. I learned how (and when) to use sarcastic wit. Sometimes it can defuse a situation and/or shame a bully. It can also earn an ass-kicking though so use carefully. Mostly I just ignored them. The kind, respectful route DOES NOT WORK. If your son is overly kind, he will be taken advantage of. Being overly respectful "proves" that he won't defend himself, most likely because he CAN'T and therefore is only defense is playing soft. Kindness and respect have their place, but only after showing that one is too strong to be walked over casually.
  • I've taught my kids to make friends, have fun, work hard and not allow themselves to be pushed around. They challenge unjust behaviors by: 1) Dialoguing to point it out. If that doesn't work, Saying "Stop!" or "Back-off!" or asking a teacher, counselor (or on the baseball field, a coach) for help 2) If a belonging is taken forcefully, resist and hold on or take it back 3) If someone is intrusive and in their personal space in an unwelcome and inappropriate manner and won't listen to above, shove them out of their space We're a Buddhist family and advocate for peace, dialogue, praying for adversaries, but we stand our ground and do not take being bullied, ever. Oh, my kids are respected. I hope this helps.
  • It's up to the parents, but I believe they must be able to stand up for themselves. Allowing evil people to have their way does not promote the right nor justice. These as qualities that I have taught my children to hold dear.
  • My son was the bully's target in school, too. My husband who is an ex-Navy boxer visited the school one day wearing camo fatigues and hunting boots on the premise that he was taking Mikey (our son) his lunch money. Once the bully got a look at Mikey's dad, ALL bullying stopped and the bully befriended my son and they actually became friends of a sort. I don't know if a similar action would work on your problem, but do whatever you have to.
  • Tell them it is okay to stand up for themselves. Tell them they are not weak but strong. Go through some scenarios at home with your son so that he will know how to react the next time the situation comes up. For example: if it is verbal bullying give him some key phrases to say that will maybe put the bully in his/her place without getting your child in trouble.
  • you can be respectful without taking shit...i hope the kids is still young enough to teach that to
  • What are they being bullied about? That might give you a clue on what to work on or strengthen in your children. I wouldn't worry that you are teaching them the right things. Kind and respectful are wonderful traits! Just make sure they know when something is worth standing up to a person, you can put your foot down with respect. Then if you need to lift it to give someone a swift kick in the behind at least they will have known they did everything possible to resolve things peaceably. ;) One thing that may help is to make sure they are physically active. Not only is that good for them it will give them a physical presence plus give them friends to band together. The important thing is you are there to talk with them and let them know this will pass. Children/teens can be so cruel to others and it's something we can't always help our children. I hate to see it, I feel for my kids in their trials! Sometimes this works for the best, to make them stronger as adults.
  • As the childhood victim of bullying myself I brought up my children according to two ideals Number one - NEVER be a bully, it is probably the one thing that Dad will find the hardest to forgive you Number two - NEVER be the helpless victim of a bully. To that end, when the first occurence started, and all the 'reasoning' would not help solve the basic problem that some kids are just plain vicious and/or their parents could not care less what they do as long as it does not cause them too much personal inconvenience (and let's not even get into the 'Rednecks' and their ignorant pride in 'MY kid beat up YOUR kid' ethos) I enrolled myself and my son in a REAL martial arts program - and the problem was solved after a few painful lessons for the bully. All the wishful thinking in the world will not change the fact that some kids - for whatever reason - are always going to want to hurt and dominate other kids. As parents we can either accept this, or go on making our bullied child the victim on the altar of that insidious new religion mistakenly called 'Tolerance' Ask yourself this - and only you can answer - is this a situation where you have to put your childrens very real physical and mental welfare before any cosy concepts of 'making a better world' for a while at least? I wish you well - but I wish your children more, a swift end to the hell they are enduring. and it IS hell - I know of what I speak.....
  • To be kind and respectful to all needs to be qualified not to include abusive people to whom one should stand up to.
  • Schedule a meeting with school or district psychologist. teacher and principal and ask what the school district policy is regarding bullying. Is it ahainst the law in uour city or county? What do they do to protect the physical well being of the victims? What do they do to protect the victims from psychological damage from bullying? How are the victims allowed to respond? Does you cnild have to take martial arts classes to beat the stuffing out of these people? Does you child have to call 9-1-1 for help because nobody is stopping the abuse? Do you have to hire a lawyer to due somebody for allowing bullies to harm your child? When they see you are serious and concerned something should happen.
  • if theyre getting physical call the police on them, wish i had done that with my bullies
  • Bullies are just cowards and they cover that up by teasing other children. You need to tell your child what to say next time it happens. And what you do is you agree with the bully. If he says nice outfit. Your child needs to say I know. Or if the bully says your haircut sucks your child needs to say back I know I hate it. If you keep a green with a bully he's going to get bored with you and move on to his next victim. But your child has to stand up for himself for the rest of his life so start right now
    • Linda Joy
      Oh no! I think you've been attacked by your voice to text editor! You probably said agreeing and it changed it to a green. Mine never gets "our" right. I have to correct it every time! You know how to edit it, if you want to, right?
    • mushroom
      There are plenty of bullies who are bored with anything "green." Just sayin'.
    • Linda Joy
  • I signed my son up for karate when I learned he had a problem with his coordination thinking it would help. They were really good at teaching self defense. None of their techniques are offensive just defensive. But he was really good with words so I don't remember ever being called to school because he was fighting. I think the best idea is to talk to the teacher or counselor on how to deal with it so everyone is on the same page using the same plan. Its less confusing to the child that way.
  • I would go up the school and have a word with the teachers, enrolling them into Martial arts can help, my friends boy was being bullied at school, she enrolled him into Judo, next time the bully started on him in self defence he threw him to the floor, he was left alone after that.
  • Do not allow your thinking to be molded by today’s standards (Romans 12;2). If you teach your children to act like the other children, what have you accomplished? It is far more challenging to maintain integrity despite the actions of others, and it’s a great lesson to learn early in life. Great job mom! 😐
  • All children are bullied at one time or another. Kids have to know how to stand up for themselves or when they get older, they won't be able to cope with the real world and you'll have failed them as a parent if you don't get them ready for that. Have your kids stand up for themselves and fight back.

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