I'm a male with a girlfriend and a female best friend. My girlfriend is okay with the friendship but i sense that my friend is very jealous of our relationship. I want to remain friends with her but she wont let us be. What should I do?
by 
southwest_dj
ANSWERS: 17
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well obviously ur friend likes u more than a friend wether u think so or not. what ai sudjest is to explain to ur friend that ur a very happy wit ur relatioship and that u want to continue beoing friends wit her but if she can understand taht u are happy wit ur gurl then. she wont be seing u too much till she understands...
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Your friend obviously has a different view of your relationship than you have. You'll either have to talk to her about it or drift apart.
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Talk to your friend. Ask her straight, "Do you have an issue with my girlfriend or our relationship?" It would be unfair for her to make you choose, her or your gf. Friends should not do that, they should be happy for your happiness. I find it very telling your gf is all right with your friendship and not vice-versa. If she (your friend) is jealous that is something she needs to deal with, not put off on you. It could be she likes you as more than a friend, or it could be she just likes to control your time. Whatever the reason it sounds like she needs a wake-up call as to what her boundaries are with your relationship.
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If she won't "let you be", then you need to be very clear with your friend about boundaries. If she doesn't get it, you have a choice to make about whether or not you want someone who is like that in your life. A good friend doesn't sabotage her best friend's relationship with someone else.
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hmm..I have been the gf in this situation. i thinkt hat a friend should respect your relationships with other people..if shes not doing that..you may want to question her motives.
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If you don't talk to your friend patiently,You will never know what's the view of her about the relationship.So,I suggest making an apointment with your friend and talk about it.What's more,remember,your girlfriend is more important.
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I agree with all of the above. Unless she has a legitimate concern with your girlfriend's actions towards you, you need to realize that in her mind you are not "just friends". In my opinion, setting clear boundaries is the first step. Even if you find this difficult because it may hurt her and you care, consider that it is also unfair for you to allow her to continue believing that the friendship may evolve into something more. Good luck, and congratualtions for recognizing the problem early.
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This is the type of situation where I always screw it up. I really wish I knew. I know what I would do but it's never what I should do. I guess if she's causing problems between you and your woman then she's not being a very good friend to you. Maybe she doesn't mean to cause you any problems and she's just using a little bad judgement, perhaps if you open her eyes to the fact that she's being a bit selfish she may come around and realize that if she keeps it up there may not be a friendship at all after awhile and she might wise up and learn to share your time.
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Sorry to say it but that's how us women are. You should let your girlfriend hangout w/ your friend so they can get to know each other. My advice would be to let your friend ask your girlfriend out to go shopping or something. It might be easier if the 3 of you hung out first so your girlfriend would be a bit more comfortable around her. If they become friends, she'll be less intimidated by her. Just make sure that she knows that you 2 are JUST FRIENDS and nothing more. They may have a lot in common and get along great. The worst thing that could happen is they become good friends and ditch you to hang out. :)
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your girlfriend should be your bestfriend.
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If your friend is acting difficult now that you have a serious relationship, then she is probably jealous. She may like you as more than a friend, and you are now seeing a side that you hadn't seen before. Or, it could be that she does not like your girlfriend. Either way, you need to make it clear how you feel about your girlfriend and that if you want to remain friends, she is going to have to accept that.
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Your screw.....you will ended up having to picking one of them and if I was you I would pick my bestfriend, if your not in love with with the girlfriend of yours or planning marriage, because its a shame to lose a great friendship over a fling!
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i say if she wants to act like that then go ahead and let her its her loss eventually she will come around
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Well it shud appear Clear dhat Your "Bestfriend" is Attracted to you in somee kind of way for her to act likee dhis . if she is your Friend she would respect the fact dhat youu aree in a serious relationship. you and her shud sit down and discuss boundaries ...that shud havee been thee first thinq donee whenn yall became friend :) .Ihave a Male bestfriend and we are both in lonq relationships we both knoee that it cant qet anymoree than Friends !
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First make sure she is just jealous or she is realy on to you. Try to hug her or do some romantic things. If she likes it then you have to Decide which one is going to be your GIRLFRIEND.(are you thinking of BOTH....i know man ....careful)
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Remind your friend that she is just your friend and not your mother. she seems to not like the treatment of your girlfriend. But the truth is that she does not want to be your bestfriend, but wants to be yor girlfriend.
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A female can find it hard to watch her male best friend become romantically involved with another, especially growing together as kids and becoming adults, friendships can lean both ways, sometimes we need a best friend there to be like family, but sometimes best friends become lovers, this is what you have to tell your best friend and hope she doesn't kick you in the shin. Your best friend will get jealous because she probably thinks she is the better woman for you, the more your best friend interacts with your girlfriend the better. If they become friends I'm sure everything will work for the better, so they understand each other and their roles in your life, so hopefully it will not get out of hand.
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