by 
King Beef
ANSWERS: 79
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You have a rear shelf that you could rest a drink on.
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The elevator stops and you are the only one on it.
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the toilet is too small and you need a bigger one or when it gets wedged in the bath when you are trying to get out.
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.......you get stuck in a double doorway.
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You get fined by the UN because it contributes more to Global Warming than the entire emissions output of Australia.
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when you stand up after sitting on those plastic lawn chairs and the chair comes up with you.
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1. The policeman advised you to have brake lights on your rear. 2. You're using an entire bar of soap just to wash your bottom. 3. You temporarily lost your pet when you just thought you had a wedgie.
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you use a boomerang to put on your belt.
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At the zoo, they think an elephant is on the loose.
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Southwest Airlines insists that you buy 2 tickets.
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Southwest Airlines insists that you buy 2 tickets.
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People mistake you for Jennifer Lopez. Lol. I know, that was bad.
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.. you go to put on underwear & then realize that you were already wearing a pair, your butt just consumed it.
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You bend over and cause an eclipse
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you get busted for having two pounds of crack! i know that's an old one.
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You turn up at your friends' house and they say "Pull up a couch and sit down..." OR You can sit around a table all by yourself... OR You sunbake on the beach and a bunch of Greenpeace volunteers try to roll you into the sea...
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You hear a beeping noise when you back up. or When you wear high heels you strike oil. or You begin to think mumus or powder blue stretch pants are a viable fashion choice.
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i gotta a big butt and i cannot lie
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i gotta a big butt and i cannot lie
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Sir Mix-a-lot starts singing "Baby Got Back" when he sees you. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ybfLRFacF-c
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When the U.S.Postal Service assigns your butt it's own zip code.
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..when stranded on an island and you are the only option for food..
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when you feel tight wearing a poncho.
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When you bend over there is a eclipes.
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When you wear Yellow and People see you coming down the road and think your the Cab and try to Flag you down
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....you wear high heels and strike oil....
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You go to the beach and the lifesavers ask you to move so the tide can come in....
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When you have to put wide load on your butt,and yellow flags on your hips so that you don't get a moving violation!
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When you fart you clear out a war zone.
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You put on a pair of corduroy pants and the grooves flatten out and it looks like your wearing regular pants.
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You fart in a swimming pool and there's a tsunami.
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Sorry dup post, I was trying to add a comment.
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Update: Your butt cheeks look like to bushes from afar.
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You need blinkers to turn.
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your air bag resigns.
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Your ass is so fat that if you get the letters "P" and "W" tattooed on your ass cheecks and you bend over, it says "P0W"!
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When you're getting calls from Sir MixAlot.
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You don't wear a G-String.. You wear the WHOLE ALPHABET
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You have to wear these.
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You get Richard Simmons to quit his job.
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You find yourself alone in a crowded elevator.
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You have to continually Brush away things that have been drawn into your orbit.
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when u are sitting in a plastic lawnchair and u get up and the chair is stuck on ur ass.
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When you have to use the toliet brush to clean your rear end.
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When you sit down on an airplane toilet and your butt creates a vacum when it flushes, adhering youto the toilet
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Pidgeons land on YOU instead of the bench you're sitting on.
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Each cheek is in a different time zone.
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You sit down and you get taller.
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when you cant pull your jeans up over it
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You know you have a fat but when you have to have someone help stuff your ass in jeans.
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when i get on people,s way
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You have to turn sideways to get through a door... oh wait, you don't fit that way either.
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When it resembles that of a shelf
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When the U.S. Postal service designates your butt it's own Zip code.
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You can set a six-pack on it and it stays there.
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When you take this quiz: http://quiz.myyearbook.com/myspace/BeautyVanity/19194/do_you_have_a_big_butt.html
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When the truck behind you can't see what is in front of you.
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You know you have a big butt when you have to wear a belt to make your pants fit your waist but there to small on your booty!!
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when ur pants wont fit in
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You pass gas and it doesn't make it out....You've packed away your skinny clothes in a huge box...three times in the past 3 years...You realize that it is NOT true that clothes shrink more than once in the dryer...When you walk past a full length mirror and notice the back hemline of your skirt is at least 3 inches higher than the front.Your 3 year old says " Woah, thats YOUR BIG BUTT!" You can see your cellulite under your clothes, and through your shaper. Sad but true
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you walk backwards and here a weird beeping sound....
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you cant take one step without a pair of eyes on you
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When you sit down and get taller.
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The last time you saw your cat he was sleeping on the couch....right before you sat down!
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You know it's big when you can't wipe it by your self any more!
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When you bend over and your kids think your Santa Claus haha :)
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You have to wedge yourself into a toilet stall to use it and your "wings" fall to the floor when using it.
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You know you have a big butt if your back curves
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people continusly make fun of you for no logical reason :(
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You know you have a big butt if your back curves and your chest kind of pops out a little.
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When someone tells you to "Haul Ass" it takes you two trips.
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Its still jiggling 4 seconds after you stopped walking
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You know your butt is big when the store chime goes off twice after you've walked through the door.
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you kids can sit on it when they get tired of walking around with you in the mall
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You walk past a counter and items fall off
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You are forced to buy two seats on an airplane.
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You apply for license plates. ☺
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More black and hispanic men start hitting on you than white men. May as well say it, this question is inappropriate, politically incorrect, offensive and discriminatory anyway. The answers are funny though! lol
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When you find your scale hiding under the bed.
jtolb65 
Linda Joy 
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