ANSWERS: 69
  • I'd say we're all Sadists at heart, it just takes a little prodding to draw out the leather.
  • Well let's see - good question - Because we find it easy to take out our frustration out on them - we know what button's to push ,even if it had nothing to do with them to begin with - And it' just get's bigger from there - that's some of what I've thought of -
  • Because we are so tied to those we love, anything we do negatively will impact much more on our nearest and dearest than it will on strangers.
  • Because the people we don't care about don't care about us, either.
  • selfishness.
  • I was told once, that 'we always hurt the ones we love and trust because we'll always trust that they will love us back'. Load of bollocks sometimes, but other times it does apply. I think we do it because... beacuase we can basically be selfish and stupid and cruel sometimes. I think it hurts coming from the ones you love because it would be intensly difficult to cause the same amount of emotional pain in a stranger
  • I actually had a bit of an apiphany on this matter in the wee hours of this morning. We hurt the ones we love out of a combination of things, the first being that we have so much more power over them (if they love us back.) than we do over others. Our tinest move can crush them like a bug if we're not careful. And also, because they could do the same to us. Because somewhere in the corner of our minds, we know that they could hurt us back if they wanted to, and on some level, we fully expect them to. So with all love comes some measure of hatred. And then there's the case of hurting the ones you *Claim* to love. That's just done because you don't really love them, and so don't bother to be gentle.
  • Because we know that they really love us, and there is a part of us that is constantly looking to test that.
  • jealousy. Even if they're your sister or brother etc and you love them!
  • I think those we love are so much more vulnerable and easily hurt that if our intention is to get a reaction and really hurt someone deeply, they are unfortunately a close target and easier to hurt than a stranger. I don't think it is always intentional or conscious, but because of the close emotional connection and tie, what we do that might not bother a friend as much or a stranger at all, can be devastating to a lover or someone to whom we are the closest in every area of our life.
  • Because we know the ones we Love will take it. Example, When having PMS I can get very Bitchy... but wouldn't just let it out on anybody anywhere, but when we are around the people we Love and We Know they Love Us, We Know They Will Listen and Understand.
  • Because you are safe in the knowledge that the ones you love will be the only ones to put up with your crap. Ultimately they will always take you back.
  • Because it's so easily done. Even if we don't mean too. They trust and depend on us and that just makes it easier for us to let them down. And harder for both us and them to take.
  • Man's destructive nature is apparent in all things.
  • We hurt them because we know them. When we are angry or upset, we know just how to press their buttons. And they know how to press ours.
  • The reaons are endless...It could be what we think is best or it could be we don't want them to be hurt the same way we do.Whatever the reason in the end they'll understand it was to try and protect them from the harshness of reality.
  • Because they're handy.
  • probably we have nothing else to do.
  • There's good and evil in each of us. When we allow the evil in us to rule, it attacks love above all else. "And now abide faith, hope, love, these three; but the greatest of these is love." (1 Corinthians 13:13) The evil in us knows which hurts most.
  • to make them stronger
  • Because they are the only ones who care.
  • Because we can.
  • because we can, and we know they will forgive us. We do not deliberately do it. We know that we can be open with that person, and yes we do run into problems. We definetly learn by our mistakes, and it teaches us humbleness. It clearify's are flaws.
  • Because they are the only ones that have unrealistic expectations of who we should be.
  • so we could make up again. (:
  • I don't. I take it out on everybody else. No, j/k..
  • I believe it's because those we love most are the ones that can hurt _us_ the most, so it's kind of like a defensive mechanism.
  • they are the people we are closest to, so we are more comfortable with letting out with them. and sometimes its also because we may be afraid of getting to close to someone so we do it to protect ourselves from getting hurt.
  • they are the people we are closest to, so we are more comfortable with letting out with them. and sometimes its also because we may be afraid of getting to close to someone so we do it to protect ourselves from getting hurt.
  • Because people who are not as close to us don't care so much about what we do. It affects them less.
  • Because we are the closest people and they know, or hope that whatever we do or say we will continue to love and support them. When a person is sick and undergoing treatment sometimes they can be incredibly cruel. Most of the time the ones they love can understand and take the tantrums but it does not stop the hurt. I certainly agree that we can hurt the ones closest to us more than anyone else. The awful thing is that the hurt is not always one way we can be stung into retaliation. SORRY THIS HAS COME THROUGH TWICE DUPLICATE REPLY
  • Because we are the closest people and they know, or hope that whatever we do or say we will continue to love and support them. When a person is sick and undergoing treatment sometimes they can be incredibly cruel. Most of the time the ones they love can understand and take the tantrums but it does not stop the hurt. I certainly agree that we can hurt the ones closest to us more than anyone else. The awful thing is that the hurt is not always one way we can be stung into retaliation.
  • because its usaully the ones we love that hurt us.
  • Because we are the closest people and they know, or hope that whatever we do or say we will continue to love and support them. When a person is sick and undergoing treatment sometimes they can be incredibly cruel. Most of the time the ones they love can understand and take the tantrums but it does not stop the hurt. I certainly agree that we can hurt the ones closest to us more than anyone else. The awful thing is that the hurt is not always one way we can be stung into retaliation.
  • Because we get in trouble when we hurt strangers? No really, most of the time if I hurt someone I love, it is not intentional. I think everyone strives to make their loved ones happy. There have been times when I was selfish or inconsiderate and my actions caused pain to someone I loved. There have been occasions when I didn't do what was expected and I disappointed or hurt someone who loved me. Obviously if they didn't love me, my actions would not have caused them pain. I don't like the line, "You always hurt the ones you love." I think it's an easy way to summarize a situation you don't want to take responsibility for. I don't want anyone to love me in spite of my actions but because of them.
  • I think it's because we know that they love us and will always be there for us, no matter what. It's also like a test, to see how much they love you and how much they'll stick through problems that come around.
  • I totally agree with what pasobrio said!!! couldnt have said it better myself...in fact, took the words out of my mouth! I als o agree with romelang1
  • We know that no matter what, those are the ones that will love us. They will be right there to catch us when we fall. And because they are the ones we trust will not take anything too personally, even if sometimes it can get a little brutal.
  • I think it's just cuz they're the only ones we really CAN hurt. If you tell a random person, "I hate you," they're not really going to care or be hurt. If you tell your bf/gf of a few years, well. that'd hurt them. They're the most capable of making us feel good, and hurting us, and vice versa.
  • If you love someone, you don't hurt them.
  • Because they are the ones closest to us, therefore the hardest to avoid when we're of a mind to lash out.
  • self-preservation, hurt them that way they are the ones to distance themselves, so it's not technically your fault but with them less involved in your life you think that your safe from getting hurt from them which is what you really fear, or should something bad happen it won't affect you so much ( thats wrong bye the way) or beecause you'd rather hurt them once than over again and have to live with it, anyway as i said self-preservation
  • The answer is simple. It is a defense mechanism that people sometimes use known as Reaction Formation this sometimes causes us to reverse our actual feelings. In this case from love to hate.
  • the closer you sit to the fire the better chance you have of getting burned....
  • I think that usually it is because we are in some kind of pain, perhaps pain caused by the other person. One way to break the cycle is to talk honestly about our feelings rather than "stuffing" them.
  • It's true, and very sad. So easy to hurt & to be hurt. When we are in a close relationship, we make ourselves very vulnerable. It's that trusting vulnerability that makes the relationship close. We depend so much on the other for emotional support, that even a small off comment can hurt us greatly. We've all been there, done that. To be consciously aware of this potential, and to think before we act is very important.
  • i believe we do it because we hurt before we can be hurt...i hurt my boyfriend over and over and i dont know why i promise things i say i wont do it agian..and i still always do it..mine is lying i lie to him about the most stupid things thinking he will get mad..and i say sorry and i love you and it wont happen agian and it does...he says i hurt him because in my relationship i was in before this one i got hurt alot and now i am taking it out on him and taking him for granted because i know he is head over heals in love and will always take me back im tired of hurting him i just want him to be happy with me..he has told me that my word doesnt mean shit to him i want that trust back im tired of lying im tired of hurting him because i do love him more then anything in this world hes my everything i just cant quit hurting him....:-(
  • because if were 'hurt' then you go to those people first and sometimes u take it out on them
  • We have to experience pain before we can experience joy.
  • we hurt the ones that we love the most because they are the ones that love you the most
  • Because we know they will tolerate it most of the time
  • because they're usually the only ones there when times are tough
  • Because we know their vulnerabilities.
  • because we are always around those people. if we were around people we hated more, we would possibly try to hurt them.
  • Because we have the power to, it's so sad but true. The people we don't care about & who don't care about us, we could never hurt but the people who we want to hurt the least we end up hurting the most
  • My best guess...is that we are so busy trying to make sure we don't hurt ourselves that we focus on pushing everyone away or hurting them before they hurt us..after all is said and done though we are still hurt and nothing will save us from this. Best advice is to take the good with the bad and take risks and learn from our pain.
  • Part of it is definitely the fact that the ones who love us back are more susceptible to everything that we do. If your mom gets upset or something when you don't call, chances are a casual acquaintance will not be as affected by it. Also, our judgement is clouded by love, which can cause pain. However, if you look further, then you will realize that pain is really what brings people together. or at least one of the things. ;)
  • because you know that they will always forgive you in the end....
  • More fun and hurting someone we dont know?
  • Because they are closest to us, and since they love us-they CAN be hurt by us. It's easy. Strangers are rarely affected, let alone hurt, by another stranger's comments.
  • Teasing helps to strengthen bonds between people. We have all been on the giving and receiving end of teasing. Friendly, playful teasing helps us to alleviate anxiety, to cope, to play and to exercise our wits. Teasing can even improve relationships at work and at home. "Teasing is a pervasive activity that occurs in most group contexts including family, friends, coworkers and teammates. While teasing is commonly thought of as an ostracizing mechanism, new research has suggested that teasing actually facilitates bonds within a group and acts as an indicator of intimacy. While teasing is most prevalent among group members who are familiar with one another, teasing can be used among strangers to communicate friendliness and indirectly express affection. Thus, teasing can actually integrate the rookie by revealing both the norms of the group as well as the status of it's members." http://www.units.muohio.edu/psybersite/groups/teasing.shtml Teasing is an all pervasive activity which is a part of an effective communication process in various age groups. These groups can be classified as family, friends, coworkers and teammates. Often thought of as an ostracizing mechanism, teasing is not always harmful. If done properly and playfully in good faith, it helps to facilitate bonds within a group. An indicator of intimacy, teasing helps to understand the closeness between two individuals. Mostly prevalent among familiar group members, teasing can also be used among strangers to exchange a few words on friendliness and indirectly express affection.From the outside, teasing seems to be a twisted pleasure: affectionate and sort of insulting all at once. Teasing is a very articulate way of winning a person’s attraction. It actually helps bring people closer. http://www.mydearvalentine.com/flirting-tips/teasing.html My wife fights with me once in a while. It doesn't mean that she will leave me. It improves the understanding between us.
  • Sometimes we hurt the ones we love most because they were your guiding light the whole time, and then all of the sudden they may have the power to destroy that light, sort of like a balance beam in a way.
  • Because love finda a way to excuse the most, forgive the most and it is a safe place to vent? Or at least it is when it is true. Some people take advantage... but most are just doing what comes natural.
  • I think it's because we believe that they will always be there, always forgiving, and loving you back.
  • because they used up all of the regae regae sauce
  • There the ones we trust the most.
  • Because we can.
  • lolz i just posted the question 1 min ago on Why is it the one's we love are the one's that hurt us the most? so its the opposite of ur question.. and really i dont know cuz i never hurt the one i love .. however the one i loved in the past always hurted me.. i wish i knew why ppl hurt the one's they love or hurt the ones that love them .. so that i can get closure for myself.. sorry i wasnt too much of help.. but i hope u will get the answer u were looking for .. take care n God bless
  • Convenience.. They're close and want to protect quite often and it's just way to easy to use people when they care.. Most people don't know what they have till it's gone.

Copyright 2020, Wired Ivy, LLC

Answerbag | Terms of Service | Privacy Policy