ANSWERS: 3
  • So clearly, you've already extended the olive branch and she may just not be calmed down enough to accept it yet. I would wait a few days and try again. If that doesn't work, I often find putting something in writing (email, letter) works. Then she can read it in private and spend time reflecting on what you have. Good luck!
  • you have done your part by apologizing. let her cool off some people need time to get over these kinda things. In time bring her a gift and try to talk to her if that doesnt work then move on. She isnt worth you being miserable with yourself some people try to look for something to stay angry about just dont let it get you down.
  • I like what Breederbabe and chaos99 have already said. Here's a few more thoughts on the topic: feeling terrible about mistakes like this is a good thing -- that's what helps to put us back on track with regard to our commitment to being kind and understanding about others. There's a cycle to this kind of mistake: (a) you want to do the right thing (b) you screw up or fall short of your values (c) you feel badly about it (d) you try to clean up the damage, get back up on the horse and go back to (a). No human being alive has every done better than to improve their ability to "move through" this cycle quickly. You're always going to make mistakes and fall short, and then feel bad. That's being human. The only way to really screw it up is to skip one of the steps -- i.e. failing to acknowledge the mistake, or failing to allow yourself to feel badly about it, or failing to re-commit to your values, etc. As long as you are willing to get back up on the horse and try to ride again, that's as much as anybody can ask of a human. Don't beat yourself up too much. When people are unable to forgive, there's often stuff they have to work out for themselves -- large portions of it have nothing to do with you or your mistake. Most of the time when someone is hurt, the pain is 90% past-based: it triggers incomplete things from prior incidents which had nothing to do with you. You're not responsible for that part of their psyche.

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