ANSWERS: 4
  • Stop saying sorry and have a little more confidence in yourself. You've got to talk out the issues completely or they're never going to go away. Your effort to play peacemaker will only be detrimental to your relationship in the long run. Stick to your guns!
  • If you've already talked to him about it, and he hasn't put in any effort to--with you--fix the relationship, or even if he has put the effort in, but your patterns of fighting haven't improved, then I don't think there is anything you can do about it. Sometimes people just aren't compatible. If I were you I'd move on.
  • Big problem for many people is getting over the idea that someone has to be right and the other wrong. Takes maturity though, to realize that two people can have different opinions, experiences, values and even see the same event or hear the same thing and perceive it differently. Dont "give in", but do try to be tolerant of his insecurity, as apparently he doesn't think he can be right unless you arent. You can just state how you see it or feel about it and say "I dont see it the way you do, although I know you see it this way, I guess we will just have to agree to disagree". Then change the subject. If its a personal matter that needs to get resolved between you, then say you are interested in discussing it when you arent both upset. Then discuss it later when you can both do it with respect and love for the basic goodness of the other.
  • In all honesty, I would hardly give that insecure-excuse-for-a-member-of-the-human race a second or even a third thought! Good riddance AND GOOD-BYE! There is absolutely no excuse to pine and whine and feel sad or lonely over the person who mentally and/or physically abuses you. There are LOTS of ways to move-on AND find someone A WHOLE LOT BETTER who will treat you with the respect you so rightfully deserve! I posted the following quite a few times, but I think it's worth posting again. The first suggestion I'm making WILL HURT LIKE THE DEVIL for a few weeks or months - maybe longer! THE ONLY suggestion I can make is to forget about THAT person and move-on! DON'T sit home on any evening waiting for him to "throw you a bone"! GET OUT of that mindset and that environment! If you have one or more hobbies or outside interests such as fishing, knitting, tennis, golf, cooking, baking, trading, real estate, computers, etc., find a club or group in your area with people who have the same hobbies or interests. You don't have to go to bars, clubs or other "meat market"-type environments. There are some great places to meet nice people right in your own environment and perhaps if you get out of your "comfort zone" just a bit, a whole new world might open before you. If you go to church, temple or mosque, perhaps there are events for singles. If not, go on-line and find-out when and where those social events will occur. At your work, ask about professional organizations, which you can get involved with and participate in. Whatever your interest, IT'S UP TO YOU TO PARTICIPATE AND BE ACTIVE! Get on committees. Let people know you're alive! Get out of your comfort zone just a little: Find a worthy charity and on a regular, dependable basis - just as though it was a second job - do volunteer work for that charity. "The powers that be" and many caring, loving people - the folks you may be hoping to meet and "rub elbows with" and get to know, are those ladies and gentlemen doing volunteer work at hospitals, nursing homes, worthy charities and causes. When you do volunteer work on a consistent, dependable basis, your ability increases, your horizons expand and meeting that "special someone" AND possibly "climb, up the social ladder" could be greatly shortened and you could be recognized A WHOLE LOT SOONER. Are you bashful or an introvert? Perhaps you could enroll and participate in public speaking courses to help you "turn your flower bud into a live, vibrant, beautiful blossom" or plant! There are wonderful courses! If you want something more specific, look for "PUBLIC SPEAKING" in my "Summary". It's just above this series of ***********. BELIEVE ME: NO ONE is going to come and knock on your door asking if you can come out and play. YOU HAVE TO get out three and let yourself be noticed. YOU HAVE to get out there and meet new people! Thanks for asking your Q! I did my best to answer it! VTY, Ron Berue Yes, that is my real last name! Sources: My wonderful family, friends, acquaintances and business associates! The trading groups I belong to. The volunteer work I do. Some personal observations and opinions. "THE University of Hard Knocks" Also known as ("a/k/a") "life's valuable lessons".

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